I am so depressed. I have no desire to do anything. I feel bad for those who know me and haven’t gotten kicked me out of their lives yet. It’s only a matter of time before they do. i am put down by the ones I care about, either blatantly to my face, or through their actions. Yes, I have thought of talking to a psychologist. No, i wont because i know what they will say and i dont have the desire or any drive to change anything. i am just going through the motions of life, a wasted “person” if that’s what I can even be called who is using up precious oxygen that could have been given to someone else
I’m sure there’s very little comfort I can give you in your current state, but I assure you there’s plenty of oxygen for everyone in the world, yourself included. Professional help seems to be the order of the day. If not a psychologist then a psychiatrist who can treat you with some of the latest anti-depressives including Prozac (Fluoxetine)
Mayve thinking about it this way will help, Depression is a sign, o change to come. you are at a crossroad right now and you can choose which ever way you want, you are at a unique postion to redifine your self and who you are and what you can become, so embrace that position and take back control of your life and be the person you want to be
Come on darlin' - don't EVER give up - fight back with the very last breath you have. You're young, (younger than me at least), you have your physical health, you can get out and about and meet people (obviously keeping the 2 metre apart rule) and apart from feeling mentally ill, which I appreciate is not nice, you do not have to deal with physical pain.
The mind has a tendency to focus on the negatives rather than the positives. If there are 9 positives and one negative, one tends to focus on the negative. It's possible that you are just looking at the few negatives and overlooking the positives which may be abundant. Just take a blank notebook and write down all your positive qualities, achievements and experiences in life, and refer to it from time to time. You will find a great morale booster in it. This has been used as a tool by spiritual teachers in ancient and modern times to boost morale and self-esteem. You may find this tool useful, but do explore all other techniques and tools you may get, along with professional help, to be strong enough to conquer your depression. I came to read this great saying by the Burmese Nobel prize winner Aung San Suu Kyi today, and who was incidentally imprisoned and under house arrest for twenty years for opposing her country's military dictatorship. "I think, if you have enough inner resources, then you can live in isolation for long periods of time and not feel diminished by it." ~ Aung San Suu Kyi
I am also living to be living. I am home killing time. I am waiting for my time to come. I do nothing else.
I have struggled with depression many times over the years. I think one of the most important things to keep remembering is that you are not alone, and many millions of people all over the world suffer with the condition as well. There are no easy answers but I wish you the best. Personally I find music helps my mood a lot, and I listen to it all the free time I have. Here is a track which I hope you may like, which touches on these feelings.
Sorry that you're going through this @Girlcurious. You're welcome to say more about what's going on and why you feel this way if you'd like. You have inherent worth as a human being. You're also probably a much better person than you give yourself credit for being. The put-downs you are getting may be distorting your view of yourself. You may be able to make some subtle changes that help, and then make more changes if your condition improves. This link in particular, and the links it leads to, may be worth checking out. Conventional Treatments for Depression and Mental Illness I hope that something can help.
