Understanding Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation...regarding Myself

Hey everyone!
Ok...I am without question a "man."
I consider myself straight...mainly due to the way I live my life. In short...from all outward appearances I look, act, sound, dress, etc as any other man who is straight or heterosexual.

When it comes to sexual orientation...I don't really feel the need to apply a label to myself...but more of just trying to get an idea of what group I would fall under. I can't figure it out so I hope I can get some opinions from some of you.

In my younger life I was without a doubt heterosexual. I had several girlfriends, more sexual encounters than I can conceivably count with women only and there was no other inner desires.
When I was around 13-14 years old and coming into puberty, I naturally started to discover my body and began to experiment with masturbation as well as discovering that I really enjoyed anal stimulation. To me, that was a sensation that was enjoyable but also very taboo and needed to be hidden or suppressed.
As I got older and progressed through my 20's and 30's...I always focused my attentions on females, ciswomen, etc...but secretly when I was alone, I would use different objects to play with my ass. I knew this wasn't "straight"...but it was my secret.

Time went by and one day I just made the decision that I was going to seek out and experience sex with someone who had a cock. I had fantasized for years what it would be like to be face to face with a cock and finally one day...I had made an arrangement to meet up with a MTF Trans escort. Was so nervous!
I was about to shatter every preconceived idea of what I considered myself to be and I was excited about it.
I went with a Trans woman because I still (to this day) wanted femininity but it was her cock I wanted most.
The moment I took her cock into my mouth...I realized I was experiencing the most erotic, sexually invigorating moment of my entire life. I didn't lose my anal virginity that day, but it was that day that I knew I was a heterosexual anymore.

So here today, I realize that I am attracted to not just the binary genders. Which (correct me if I'm wrong) rule out Bisexuality.
I'm still very attracted to cis-women. I also get very sexually amplified by males who are younger, smaller in stature and somewhat effeminate. Twinks, Femmes...I find to be very arousing!
MTF Trans are always attractive to me. They're feminine with a cock!

All that being said...I'm "sexually" attracted to the binary genders of male and female but also to include trans gendered. I have never experienced a FTM Trans or someone who is non-binary, but I would if I found them sexually attractive then I would without question want to experience them.

To me...sex is to be enjoyed with the person you are with regardless of how they were born or how they identify. Sex is pleasure...it doesn't matter who they are as long as the two of you are mutually attracted and want to share yourselves.

A long post...but here's the question:

What is my sexual orientation?..... to those who will share their opinion.

 

Do you really want to put a label on it.
You don't have to identify to the world, what you do in private is your business.

I don't want a label. I identify as straight but that's always been the norm I guess.

I read the terms cock curious and mostly straight here. Maybe we are that, I have not taken the plunge but hope to.

I'm not going to put a label on me or "Identify as"

Been married a long time, she is happy and I have things I want to experience for the physical sensation and experience.

If people don't want to be with someone experimenting then maybe I go down the escort line, until then there are toys in the draw and the internet

 

I agree that I don’t feel like I need to put a label on myself. I guess it’s more a curiosity of if I were to feel the need to fit into some category, which one would it be?
I’m not “gay”... but most definitely Bi...but what about Pansexual or something else

I don’t have any desire or inner need to come out to the world “Hey everyone I’m bisexual!”
I live my life as a straight he/him and what I do in the privacy of my or someone else’s bedroom whether it’s eating pussy or getting topped by a hot trans girl...is no one else’s business.

 

Seems like you're open to swinging both ways but desire some sense of femininity with your partner. If you're open to NBs or anyone else who isn't strictly of one gender that would make you pansexual, if you're looking for a term.
PS: Liking butt play doesn't mean you like guys. It just means you like butt play. Everyone has a butt.

 

Sex is about reproduction, but love knows no boundaries.

 

Humans have sex for pleasure as well as reproduction, variety is the spice of life and why some people are more adventurous or have different preferences

 

Love makes the world go round, and anyone who tells you otherwise, is a sore loser.

 

Yes love makes the world go round and this is a Hippy Forum I should expect that.
I am in a relationship but I am here talking about other physical pleasures and desires that come from being open to different experiences, ones I have not experienced due to my relationship status.
I want specifically looking for a hippy Forum my search lead me to Forum threads of interest.
I think the OP is considering their sex or sexiality , that may lead to love if they find a relationship with a common thread.
For others it might be the physical pleasure of a certain Act and love may lir elsewhere.

 

Love knows no boundaries, and is extremely open-minded and flexible too!

 

I’m versatile so in some situations I do bottom. It isn’t really a sense of feeling feminine but more of an urge or desire for no other reason than it just feels good. Getting fucked feels really good!

On the flip side, I’ve had male partners that are almost always smaller statured twinks and I’m definitely a Top in those situations. I’m not really attracted to masculinity so in males I prefer femmes or effeminate twinks over bigger muscular guys. When I bottom it’s always for MTF Trans or a versatile twink.

Regarding NB...to me...it’s all about sexual attraction. If the attraction is there then I’m open to sex. In that case it’s about the person not their gender.

 

I can relate to the OP. I never knew that transgender women existed until a woman that I had been chatting with online confessed that she was trans. I did not believe her so she “proved” it to me. When I saw her cock I immediately knew that I wanted to suck it and get fucked up the ass.

After years of denial I finally acted on my desires and met a transgender woman in person. I thought I would freak out when I saw her cock but she still seemed a woman to me.

That night she fucked me in the ass five times cuming each time. I loved it and I knew that I was born to be a bottom.

Now years later I have a transgender girlfriend who is a pure top and I am her bottom. The sex is the best of my life but what’s more, I adore this woman. Am I gay or bisexual or straight? I don’t care - I am just happy.

 

Good question how does that define you?
Satisfied come to mind.

I'm not sure about the top/bottom scenario for men. Does the bottom get a load away?

In a gay male male relationship do partners swap, have mutual oral or does the bottom ever get to fuck?

My curiosity has me wanting to try various options not just be a bottomed and the guy says no I don't do that,

 

With gay sex, there are roughly three types of sexual roles, top, bottom and versatile. Some people like my girlfriend and I are pure top and pure bottom. She always does the fucking and gets sucked and I get fucked and suck her cock. Basically I service her cock and take her load in my ass or my mouth.

Most people are somewhere in between. They are versatile and may top or bottom depending on their partner or give and receive equally. Even if they are versatile though they tend to lean more one way or the other but they are not as rigid as my girlfriend and me.

 

Thanks,
It's interesting since she is your girlfriend but I guess dominant being the top fucking you or getting her cock sucked.
I can't find an easy NSA hookup it makes me think how people with the same needs ever get together in a small group of people

 

Sexually she is dominant for sure. Of course her cock is much bigger than mine so she says it’s right that she is the top. I love servicing her big cock!

I think the only way to find people who match is on the internet. You can find transgender women on Tinder and Grindr.

You might think my girl is a big masculine type of woman but she is very delicate and feminine.

 

She would get a lot of attention in certain circles. And she has a bonus for you.

 

She does get attention from men that’s for sure. Of course most of them would not be interested in being a bottom for her!

 

I'm sure there are curious men out there that are one-day hoping to bottom for someone why not a trans girl and who better than someone who is appealing to look at. I think a feminine partner is a way to break the ice and see what we are missing

 

I did some research and among transgender women, only about 5% identify as pure tops. Of course there are a lot of versatile women who will also top. Among men who are interested in transgender women, again only about 5% say they are pure bottoms. Again many men will go both ways.

The problem for my girlfriend is she lives in the Philippines and hardly any guys there will bottom for a girl like her. Her sex life prior to me was restricted to flings with foreigners in the country on business or pleasure. So she is happy to be with me since I love to bottom and I only care about satisfying her cock.

 

Agreed
I'm versatile...but I consider myself a versatile/top.
A good majority of the time, I go into a sexual encounter with the desire to top...and that is mainly due in part to the choices I make beforehand. As mentioned before, I prefer to hook up with pure bottoms or versatile partners. There have been times when I have gone in with the intention to top...and then after we get going, I get the desire to bottom. That happened recently when I went to visit my Thai ladyboy friend.
We had been going back and forth sucking each others cock and then she got up on her knees and was thrusting her cock into my mouth. To me...I took that as she wanted to top, so I had a mental switch at that point and told her I wanted her to fuck me. She seemed indifferent and maybe that was because she wanted to bottom. I got on my knees and arched my back. I felt her lube me up...and then I felt the contact of her cock touching my hole before I felt her push. She fucked me really good that night. I didn't know she had it in her! The next time I go see her, I owe her a good topping.

Thats true...but in my opinion...thats the difference between gay and bisexual men.
Gay men are not attracted to femininity...they want the opposite, masculinity.
I appreciate the feminine qualities of women even if she is packing a cock. To me it's the best of both worlds.

I also like to keep in mind that when you have female hormones in play, you also have female tendencies to be moody as well as other lesser desired traits. Trans women are the same way. That's when having sex with other men can become appealing. Think about how horny you may be at any given time...and then look at other guys. Other men are just as horny and want sex just as much as any other guy. They will sneak off, they will meet at a moments notice, they will suck your cock sitting in a car, they will drop their trousers for you behind a building, they will gladly let you fuck them...or fuck you...at any given time.
However, for me...considering how much I am attracted to females...I have to look for certain qualities in a potential male sex partner. I'm more selective...in order to satisfy my attraction.
My preferred male sex partner is a younger Twink around 21 years old, around 5'5" or shorter, 135# and a nice smooth hairless ass and shaved balls.