Unable to deal with failure

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by Bella Désordre, Feb 2, 2009.

  1. Bella Désordre

    Bella Désordre Charmed

    Messages:
    10,565
    Likes Received:
    1
    anyone else have this problem?
    I didn't think it was a problem, rather a blessing, increasing my desire to do well in life. But then, this weekend, I burnt a pan of cookies (toffee and dark chocolate), threw them in the sink and started crying and screaming. i now know it's a serious issue.
    I also think it's what drives my procrastination. I am afraid to complete something, fearing it won't be good enough.
    I don't have a therapist right now to ask about this. i am wondering if a good cognitive therapist would tell me to try more things and work on how I accept failing at them or ?
    I just don't know. i need a therapist.
     
  2. seizedbyanger

    seizedbyanger Banned

    Messages:
    5,638
    Likes Received:
    6
    if i fuck up, i get pissed and agitated, but i don't really see it as a failure.

    idk, i just deal with everything that comes my way.
     
  3. I'minmyunderwear

    I'minmyunderwear Newbie

    Messages:
    59
    Likes Received:
    9,110
    i'm a bit like that. apparently not to the same extent though...

    i don't really have any advice beyond start smoking weed, which you've already done...
     
  4. nakedtreehugger

    nakedtreehugger craaaaaazy

    Messages:
    5,236
    Likes Received:
    10
    you don't need a therapist. just take responsibility for your own life. for your own decisions. own up to who you are and the things you need to work on, and then work on them.

    it's not rocket science. it may seem scary, but it's perfectly possible to grow on your own without spending thousands of dollars on therapists.
     
  5. bluesafire

    bluesafire Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,757
    Likes Received:
    4
    You're already dealing with failure. After all, you're still with us. :)
     
  6. Bella Désordre

    Bella Désordre Charmed

    Messages:
    10,565
    Likes Received:
    1
    I must say, I do like your advice!
     
  7. Bella Désordre

    Bella Désordre Charmed

    Messages:
    10,565
    Likes Received:
    1
    You are so pretty and etherial looking.
     
  8. olhippie54

    olhippie54 Touch Of Grey Lifetime Supporter

    Messages:
    14,498
    Likes Received:
    11
    That almost sounded like a "low blow".
     
  9. Bella Désordre

    Bella Désordre Charmed

    Messages:
    10,565
    Likes Received:
    1
    no, not an option or a desire. I say "omg I wanna kill myself' a lot, but never mean it. Usually it's to express the severity of a situation to my husband or just to be a drama queen.
     
  10. Cherea

    Cherea Senior Member

    Messages:
    12,114
    Likes Received:
    40
    Now you can't accept not accepting failure.
     
  11. bluesafire

    bluesafire Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,757
    Likes Received:
    4
    thank you. :)
     
  12. Dave_techie

    Dave_techie I call Sheniangans

    Messages:
    14,932
    Likes Received:
    3
    I am this kind of perfectionist
    it sucks.
     
  13. bluesafire

    bluesafire Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,757
    Likes Received:
    4
    Oh I'm sorry I didn't mean it like that. I meant that she's alot stronger than she thinks. But... there are different ways to deal with a situation... maybe she could consider a different way if she thought about it differently. Question your thoughts, that's what I suggest. :)
     
  14. Cate8

    Cate8 Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,414
    Likes Received:
    11
    ohhhh lets throw cookies together. And smash plates. and um, go egging!

    and make new cookie dough and smear it on each other.
     
  15. Frieden

    Frieden Senior Member

    Messages:
    5,085
    Likes Received:
    48
    Me and you, we are two totally different creatures. I don't mind failing at, to the point where I have very little try. I do not remember the last time I really put effort into anything, and I'm not exaggerating.
    I think my condition is worse.
     
  16. bluesafire

    bluesafire Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,757
    Likes Received:
    4
    you want us to toss our cookies? :eek:
     
  17. Bella Désordre

    Bella Désordre Charmed

    Messages:
    10,565
    Likes Received:
    1
    that sounds divine! I miss egging and tping. Highlite of highschool (besides dry humping of course).
     
  18. olhippie54

    olhippie54 Touch Of Grey Lifetime Supporter

    Messages:
    14,498
    Likes Received:
    11
    I was teasing you, dear.
     
  19. Cate8

    Cate8 Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,414
    Likes Received:
    11
    haha nasty missy
     
  20. Wild Mountain Dave

    Wild Mountain Dave Rainbow

    Messages:
    6,605
    Likes Received:
    13
    Doesnt seem right to freak out and start crying over baked goods. I wouldnt say you need a therapist but I will say that it sounds as if you are on the wrong track. It's good to have drive to be the best you can be but at the same time you should have a love affair with yourself that is not detructive.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice