Top 1000 things that you can do with an egg

stick it in a raffle

 

drain the life force and paint it pretty so that easter bunnies will fornicate in it's gurudevic proximity

 

*GURUDEVIC!!*

spin it

 

Rapturously devour

 

show it some love

 

gently stroke

 

get 2 and have a rolling race with a friend

 

Pretend it isn't R E A L O.O

 

shoot at it and make it dance

 

bust your load all over it in an attempt to fertilize it

 

snort it

 

eggshell tea

 

sell it for lots of people's hard earned cash and retire on the profits.

 

sit on it

 

give it to a vegetarian.

 

put it in your mouth
walk around with it protruding
making weird noises

 

take it on holiday and let it sit on a sunbed before the crack of dawn in order to reserve one. that'll piss the germans off.

 

boil it in chicken broth

 

scream at it until it rolls away from you

 

throw the egg....


...then catch it