to hit or not hit...

Discussion in 'Attachment Parenting' started by Mgmlovespeace, Mar 29, 2012.

  1. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    You don't see the irony of it do you?

    You find the subject of using violence on children to be funny...

    Pretty much sums up everything we need to know about you doesn't it?
  2. FlowerMama

    FlowerMama Member

    No no no... I find YOU funny. :D
  3. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    As for your edit...

    If children are raised in an intelligent caring household, violence is never needed...

    Those that think it is needed, are people who have no patience with their children and take the easy way out... smack them... and hey, if that doesnt work, obivously you just didnt smack them hard enough right?

    How about you raise your children to respect what you say by treating them with respect?

    I know eh... such a hard concept.

    Oh wait.... you are arguing with me.... perhaps I should come smack you to get you to pay attention?
  4. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    and I find you to be disgusting
  5. FlowerMama

    FlowerMama Member

    I'd try to have a reasonable conversation with you, but it doesn't seem possible without you behaving like a pissy teenager - you know you can make a point without calling people names - actually if anything, by making a personal attack it weakens your argument because you show yourself to be too emotionally involved to be taken seriously.

    And so these are the last words and minutes of my time wasted on some one who cannot even have a proper conversation.

    I'm sure someone else will try to speak to you, and explain their point of view, and I'm sure you'll just throw more obscenities around to cover for your inadequates, especially since you still didn't answer my question as to how you'd keep your child off the road, but I guess I was expecting to much.

  6. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    and yet, you want to turn more children into adults just like me...
  7. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    oh, and yes, if someone else's opinion is that it is okay to use violence against children, then YES, I will FUCKING use obscenities

    Because people who think using violence against ANY child is justified, don't deserve the tiniest bit of respect... they deserve exactly what they are handing out to CHILDREN.
  8. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    Something for everyone to keep in mind, especially those who don't like the way I talk to people or how I express myself....

    Everytime you raise your hand to a child, there is a chance you are turning that child into another me....

    When that child grows up, looks you in the eye, calls you a **** and punches you square in the mouth... remember, YOU trained them.
  9. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    There's a big difference between physical abuse and a corrective spanking. The area between them might be small, especially when parents are frustrated and angry but if you have a kid that proves to be hard to discipline (not always because of a lack of patience in the parents department of course) it has been a succesful and accepted way for centuries. This does not mean it should be practised as much as in the past but it does mean some kids benefit from it. I think the wondering across the road example is a pretty good one.
  10. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    If you live somewhere that your child can wander across a road, then you as the responsible adult, should be monitoring them when they are outside. You talk to them, explain that you don't want them to get hurt and the road is dangerous because of the vehicles that travel on them.

    If you hit them, because they do wander on the road, all you have taught them is that if they get CAUGHT, they will get hurt... by YOU.

    Stop and think about what you are teaching... if you want to get your way, it is okay to use physical threat.

    If it isn't right for an adult to do that to another adult, how can it even be conceivable that it is okay for an adult to do it to a child?

    If it is okay for an adult to use on another adult, then why do people keep freaking out when I tell them I will use violence on them if they do what I don't like and hit a child around me?

    You are arguing FOR 'Might makes Right'....

  11. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    If the kid is not backwards in some way it will understand why it received punishment in a case like that. You are talking from your experience I understand, but I am talking from mine. It did not hurt me because it was used righteously.
  12. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    So, as long as I feel righteous about it, it is okay if I beat other people?
  13. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    That's your interpretation.
  14. Meliai

    Meliai Banned

    I think older children are smart enough to explain things to them. I babysat my nephew a lot when he was young and from the time he was 3 years old I was able to explain things to him. He would not only listen but he would hold conversations about not only the fact that he should not do something, but why he shouldn't do something. Kids are smarter than people give them credit.

    I plan to raise my own child the same way, by explaining and by using time-out. Putting a kid in time out gives them an opportunity to THINK about what they did, instead of reacting to violence.

    Younger children can't understand reasoning, but I don't think they can understand violence, fear, and pain either. Younger children simply need more supervision. Older children need to be taught how to think about their actions.
  15. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    Yes it is... strange how that works eh? Someone talking about their own interpretation of something...

    ignoring that... the problem with the idea that 'some' abuse is okay 'if' used in the right way, is that it makes our society one where the mighty rule over everyone else. Look at our society, it is a reflection of that.

    Don't like what the cops do to protestors? Oh well, the cops are trying to prevent more harm by launching pepperspray canisters at peaceful people's heads... after all, if the 'revolution' took hold, a lot more people would get hurt.

    In a society where might makes right, it is only the 'mighty' who decide what is enough, or righteous. While you may think it is okay to use some, you don't get to decide what level that some is at, those who are stronger, have better weapons make those decisions.

    I just love how some of the same people who argue for peace and love, think it doesn't apply to children...

    Hitting is not a sign of affection towards children, it is abuse.

    What do you tell your child when they get sent home from school because they hit someone who called them a name?

    Do you ask them, "Did you feel it was righteous?"

    Do you tell them it was okay if they felt it was?

    I hope that you don't say something silly like, "Hitting is wrong, you have to learn to use your words" and then turn around and hit them for running across the road....
  16. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    Abuse is never okay, if you think I said that you are again misinterpreting me.
  17. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    No, I am not letting you use words to disguise the truth...

    Hitting, IS abusing.

    You should not need to use physical punishment, or the threat of it in raising children.

    Think about the excuses that are being used to claim it is okay...

    "as a last resort" means, when you don't know what else to do, and you know something needs to be done, hit them.

    THAT is frustration... and it is wrong.
  18. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    I guess we just have to disagree then. Physical correction can be righteous but should of course be avoided. It's ok if you think I for instance was physically abused as a kid (which by your logic you probably would think), I know better.
  19. ChronicTom

    ChronicTom Banned

    Well, just make sure you remember this conversation the next time someone hits you, because according to them, they will most likely feel justified and righteous for doing so...
  20. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

    I'm pretty sure I won't. Getting hit by a stranger is a total different issue to me, wether I asked for it or not.

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