When your beard gets long you have to be careful when you masturbate. The only way to clean cum from your beard really is to jump in the shower.
My plan for Total Beard Domination is under attack. The Fellowship of the Beard must disband. -Frodo! You must take the Beard to Mount Groom and Shave it into the Razory Chasm. (insert picture of bearded Frodo here) My boss threatened me today. da bitch... She told me I should start looking for another job if I don't shave. (I work in the fast food business, like a true gangsta) Looks like I cant just let it grow. I have to start trimming it and giving it a shape early or I'm fucked. Tho look for a new job I shall!! The evil circle of the shavin continues...
One time when I didn't shave for 6 months I had a friend who showed pics of me without a beard and asked random girls which they preferred. 100% of them told me without. So we can safely conclude that no beard is better.