The Thread of LIES!!!

I woke up soft

 

i love shaving my legs so much. i just, i cannot even express how much i love it when i accidentally gouge out a huge chunk of my flesh and it won't stop bleeding. but it's cool. i didn't need all that blood anyway.

 

I love onions

 

i just got my whole to-do list done. and now i have the whole day to relax.

 

I have nothing to do today and will be online all day

 

everything i just said is true and accurate

 

my real name is Brad Pitt

 

my real name is angelina jolie.

 

I'm rich

 

i can melt faces with my guitar skills.

 

I ama lousy salesman and I Im no good at dickering

 

also my spelling is top notch all the time

 

I hate chocolate sundays....

 

i hate bob dylan...

 

I hate cheese cake with a strawberry topping on top.

 

I just ate my computer keyboard for desert, seeing as how I hate chocolate sundays so much.....

 

I've never been to dairy queen...I hate that shit

 

Dariy Queen = uke:

 

tank tops are awful on women...I wish they would never wear them...especially tight white one that show a little sideboob

 

:ack2: