The sense of belonging one has

I was a navy brat, too! I've moved too many times to count. I've never really felt at home in any place that I've lived. I've always just felt really unsettled.

 

Are you an outgoing person, Karmalized?

Great screename BTW.

 

I don't really hate the place, I just can't wait to get out. I don't really hate anything. But it's such a small country living in the shadows of other countries. Angry, self-righteous little people. It sounds like generalizing but try living here.

Again, of course, there are pearls in a kingdom of rocks.

I'm the kid from a tiny place in Eastern Europe with the American dream.

 

For the most part, yes. And thank you

 

it's a blessing and a curse, really. you can make new acquaintances easily, feel pretty comfortable anywhere, go with the flow and stuff. but i remember maddening envy for kids i knew who'd lived in one house all their lives and had a history with people.

 

Funny, the moving around has made me a bit of the introvert.

But sometimes I flip my personality inside-out.

 

Me too. like those darn kids that had gone to school in the same district since, idk, conception? the worst time for me was highschool.

 

i HATED where i'm from. Fucking hated it more then anything. The only thing that kept me going when i was in school, was the fact that one day i'm going to get out of here. my hate for my home was the one thing that gave me my drive.

which is really funny, because now i really dont care where i live. I dont care if i stay here. I just wana be close to my family.

 

I've also moved a lot (I think I counted 15 homes altogether) and I'm actually happy with it. I've been wanting to get out of this country since I was 12-13 so all of it always seems temporary.

And I was never jealous of the kids who had lived in one house for their whole lives. I mean, you see those people at parties. They always leave at 11PM.

Why?

Because they want to sleep on their own pillow!

 

you certainly don't seem like an introvert to me.

Moving around so much made me an extrovert, for survival. I mean I never knew what to talk about with other kids, because I never got to know them enough to come up with a good convo starter. But Ive always been excellent at cracking jokes. So that's what I would do. Crack jokes, make fast friends with the class clowns and then move again. Repeat, Repeat, Repeat.

 

I'm the same type, I'm a social introvert.

 

Oh, yeah. Jokes and fantasies always gets people's warmth.

You're a good girl.

People usually don't guess that I'm as shy and cerebral as I am, because I have an outgoing social mask. Among many other masks for each ocasion. One of my great pleasures is bringing out an "inappropriate" mask and take people by surprise.

Van Gogh: Why did you hate good ol' L.I.?

 

Jesus Christ, we're the same person. :huh:


Anyway. A good friend of mine told me that if I'm the way I am now at 20+ then I'm a sociopath..

 

well, at the time i hated everything.

i was reading sophies world at 14. philosophy books. Listening to DK and cheap sex. I was waaaay way way just all about anti everything.

and when you live in LI. its everyone drinking and going to football games.
it just clashed.

i dont really care where i live anymore

 

Jeez, I already have two people I wanna meet when I'm in NY..

 

You a cerebral introvert sweetheart?

 

Come down my man. Unfortunately, I can't serve you beer.

 

I can't come yet, man.

My destination is actually Vegas but.. I could make a stop for NY.

But it'll take me at least a year.

If not two.

 

Hopefully I'm alive then!

 

Fingers crossed.