the off-topic thread

With an Ipod, you can listen to songs ten times faster than normal. You can listen to...like... 75 songs in an hour.

 

You shouldn't have mentioned his nasal hair.

 

There's nothing in life that I can't solve with a screwdriver.

 

I have stolen his mighty beard of masculinity.

 

I think you'll find that everything you've ever done is overrated and rubbish and you're going to die in a piss-filled ditch.

 

For my last birthday I got a miniature galleon. Totally useless.

 

In this world, we live to grow old.To die in a gruesome fashion,.to remind ourselves of the pain we suffered. And to accept that what is.......Is.

I confess I hate sultanas in a curry dish.

 

I wish my mother would support me instead of making me feel like shit about everything.

 

You mean the goat?

 

I learned today that ducks can land on terra firma. So not just water as I first thought. You see, I always thought that if they landed on land, they would break their legs. The other day I saw two ducks sleeping on the roundabout.

 

Ever noticed how the name Louise is remarkably close to the word "louse", how does this affect people called Louise and does it explain why they so often have an inferiority complex?

 

The other day, I got stung by a Giant Hogweed. Very nasty rash on my arm. With all this sunlight, no surprises. saw a few new Giant Hogweed patches by the railway lines. Large towers of course weeds. I have been fighting the weeds in my communal garden.

 

Horace is my narcoleptic teddybear.

 

It's not a proper shed. It's more like a big Wendy house.

 

Are you ready for a new kind of salad? A salad made entirely of beef.

 

She was eating a Mullerlight thing and getting it all over her scarf.

 

Mr Bronson is dead. He wasn't just in Grange Hill...He was in Star Wars

 

This heat is making me be a bitch to everyone.

 

Shoubbydooboby whop whop bo, whack, whack do, sippy, dat dippyidy whap dap de.....

.......Jazz......Funkatron........doopidoopido....oo.....ooo...yeah..ahhhhhh.......nice!:beatnik2:

 

I always wondered what it would be like if all cds were taken away and we just had Ipod terminals or vending machines?