the off-topic thread

Im not sad anymore because I HAVE A JOURNAL!! Gosh i thought i would never have one of those...

 

Crikey!

 

I was freezing last night
Even though i had a hot waer bottle and a really thick duvet wrapped around me twice and the heating on, and my fiancé was sweating and begging to turn it off
I also dreamed about food...which is unusual. Just random images in my brain, like macadamia nuts and red onions and bell peppers and berries, oh and cocao butter...mmm...
Seems a bit obsessive

 

if I was dying and I decided that even though I'd never particularly been into, say, Enya before but that now I really, really was into Enya and that in fact, I thought Enya was great and that Enya died for our sins and I wanted an Enya themed funeral with pictures of Enya and lots and lots of mentions of Enya, then I think it would be a bit bloody rich for my sister to ban all mention of Enya from my funeral. Yeah?

 

:lol:

 

I hate this course

 

chocolate

 

I know chewing over "what have i done to deserve this?" kind of thoughts is ridiculously futile, and sometimes i feel guilty i slip into this pattern, for i know we need to take responsibility and shut up and get on with it blah etc, which i usually do

But just some days i cant keep it quiet...when i find myself housebound age 19, and "medication" makes my body feel worse, and im in pain...and i feel bad for my fiancé, who is my financial support, and whats even tougher, my emotional and physical support when i lose full control...that hurts me the most, i think. Its a kind of guilt. For something that i didnt consciously ask for. And guilt because i know many, many people are thousands of times worse off. Im so rich, who am i to whine?

It feels good to have offloaded that Oki, its gone, im back

 

I have a journal on here now
Not that interesting tho...

 

balls

 

Sexy balls. For football...

 

Phrase of the day - "lovely knockers"

 

Over the solitary months my brain has shrivelled
Its dried, and shrivelled
Like a date or prune
Lovely

 

Lovely knockers

 

Croissants
I want croissants

 

Jugs

 

Eccles cakes

 

I just realised...
Its 4 months until i get married

:O


eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

 

I know what happens when we die. We leave our bodies and exist in spirit. If there is a heaven, no blood and flesh can enter the kingdom of heaven. So this must mean, the body is sinful, but the spirit is sinless. This was all made possible by the sacrifice of Jesus.


*I am not religious.my theoretical understanding.

 

It amuses me how people mix up judgement/punishment and the natural flow of life and lesson learning so easily

Beware the iron fist of God. Its merciless!

Wait...