Tell Aunty Iago Your Adolescent Problems.

Discussion in 'U.K.' started by Iago, May 29, 2004.

  1. Iago

    Iago Member

    Spill your guts to Honest Aunty Iago. Boyfriend dumped you for a publicity photo? Worried about the fast approaching next ice age? Socks are too tight? Just tell Iago and he'll make it all better for you.
  2. flowerchild17

    flowerchild17 I practice safe sax.

    I dont have any chocolate!~
  3. Iago

    Iago Member

    Advice : get a job as a paperboy/girl person and be real nice to the boss of the newsagent. They might give you some tasty chocolate! :)

    Alternitively you could ram-raid Thorntons with a Ford Focus. Meh.
  4. boog

    boog A square peg

    im stuck in on a saturday night. :(
  5. Iago

    Iago Member

    Advice : Watch as much mind-numbing unstimulating nerve shattering saturday night television as possible whilst rubbing salt into open cuts on your body. You will condition yourself to associate staying in on saturdays with incredible physical and mental agony, and will do anything (including sexual favours to farm animals) to avoid being stuck in on saturday.

    If you condition yourself well enough you might even develop a nervous twitch whenever anyone mentions dale winton or ant & dec. Ace :cool:
  6. Spyder

    Spyder La dah de dah

    im bored of patronising shakespearean named people on the internet...
  7. Iago

    Iago Member

    Try some chauser!
  8. Spyder

    Spyder La dah de dah


    Bifel that in that seson on a day,
    In Southwerk at the Tabard as I lay
    Redy to wenden on my pilgrymage
    To Caunterbury with ful devout corage,
    At nyght was come into that hostelrye
    Wel nyne and twenty in a compaignye
    Of sondry folk, by aventure yfalle
    In felaweshipe, and pilgrimes were they alle,
    That toward Caunterbury wolden ryde.
    GP I.20-27
  9. Valis_77

    Valis_77 Member

    I'm having trouble deciding if this life is basically meaningless and empty with nothing beyond to look forward to or whether the basic religious idea of an afterlife is correct. Any thoughts?

    Also, do the concepts of "right" and "wrong" actually exist or are they just human constructs? Do we in fact live in a world where nothing is actually right or wrong except for in popular opinion?

    Without knowing which of these (or the many other possibilities) is true, I'm having trouble figuring out how best to live my life. Should I devote my life to helping others? Should I kill myself now? Should I never work and spend my days smoking weed and watching porn? Should I go on a killing spree? Should I become a monk?

    And most importantly, is it bad that I want to fuck Beyonce even though I'm not really into her music?
  10. Iago

    Iago Member

    Advice : You have many questions of a philisophical nature, you should watch copius amounts of emotive daytime talk shows until you become so opinionated that you have an answer for every single question our greatest minds thought over. Just listen to the charming views of the nice people that infest the television studios of Trisha and Montel (Not Kilroy, god bless his silken mane :() and let them seep into your morals and ethical code. You won't care about the meanings of excistance, you'll be too busy wanting to shoot all those job stealin' asylum seekers!

    It is not bad that you want to fuck Beyonce. That is not a problem.
  11. ArtLoveMusic

    ArtLoveMusic Senior Member

    i have three nipples

    but six breasts...... what to do?
  12. Valis_77

    Valis_77 Member

    Iago, you're a wise dude!!
  13. Dandelion_Blood

    Dandelion_Blood Gremlin

    I am finding time passing really slowly this week, how can i speed it up?

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