...Suicide?

I don't think it is selfish at all. No one asked whether or not you wanted to be brought into this world, why shouldn't it be your choice to leave early?

 

ive known at least five people whos killed themselves. the most recent was this girl who was in a few of my classes in high school, she jumped in front of a train.

 

ill also say that weed has helped stop a few possible attemps.theres been a few times i was alone and thought i would be for long enough to slice wrists the right way and end up haveing a friend just suddenly show up to smoke a bowl with me.then after he left id sit here and watch stupid shit till i passed out and slept till morning.so getting high was a better idea then getting the razor blade on the counter.

 

Ouch, I gotta say doing that even never came up in my mind, that's a metric mindfuck of a way to go

 

i agree with madcap. i did the same as him, with the excessive collection of opioids & the bloodloss. painfree. life was painful & agonising & horrible & tearful, so i intended to just slip, softly, comfortably into death.

i ended up being found, and was rushed off to a hospital and pumped. i overdosed.

but i'm bein treated for schizophrenia, and back then the symptoms were WAYYYYY worse. i can't imagine what a "sane" person feels like when they end up bein suicidal. cos i was takin orders from auditory hallucinations, and considering they were the voices of my relatives, the commands implied it would make them (my relatives) happy if i went and died.

uh... yeah.

 

i tend to rush thru discussing my schiz. its kinda embarassing.

 

Well sane is a relative term, but I think I'm pretty sane, and basically I'd sum it up with this lyric:

It's over now, I'm cold, alone
I'm just a person on my own
Nothing means a thing to me
Oh, nothing means a thing to me

Even though that song was about drug addiction and that 3rd verse was supposed to be about the comedown from something, that basically sums it up. It's like living in a perpetual horrible come down.