strict

Hi...well my parents are really strict...but one day i wrote them a long letter about it..and i told them i would be honest with them if they would only trust me and understand me and not get mad at everything. i told them i wanted to date and hang out with my friends more...and i wouldn't do anything "bad". but they got all mad and said i'm just gonna get pregnant and stuff..even though i told them im not ready for sex! *sigh* its so depressing! but um...so that didn't work. but recently i met this really cool guy...and i want to hang out with him..but i don't know how because my parents. i dont want to lie to them...because i have before. in my letter i even admitted that i lied to them before and im sorry but i dont want to lie to them anymore. but it makes me so angry..sometimes i just think 'screw it'! maybe i should just do whatever i want..because i already tried with them. i mean, im already 17! i just hate being controlled. i understand they care for me, but its just gone too far. any advice??? thanks so much....i keep worrying about it...

 

Hey Dejavoo. I know how it feels....it sucks yeah. They don't want their little girl growing up so fast... they don't want to let you go just yet. You've figured this out by now. I am not a parent, so maybe this won't help, since i'll practically be stating the obvious or something you've already tried. What you need to remind them is that you're not 5 years old anymore, and you're a responsible teenager who has the brain enough to make your own choices in alot more things than what to wear for the day. State that you're not an incompatent (sorry about my spelling) person, and if they don't stop pushing you into a corner, you're not going to be able to be prepared for the real world because they keep sheltering you a little too much.

Just remind them that you're SEVENTEEN...see how that works maybe?

They're just trying to look out for you. You know that though.

Sorry for the "blah" info. I just had to try to reply to this though.

 

What about inviting the guy to hang out at your house? That way your parents can see you two interacting and maybe loosen up a little?


As far as lying to them and sneaking around, you KNOW that you will eventually get caught, and essentially make it that much harder on yourself in the long run. Maybe try starting with tiny steps towards more independance. Try and talk to them more and more. But don't whine, and complain. Just be calm and mature. Show them how responsible you are. Maybe try to do better in school (I have no idea obviously, how you are doing in school!), maybe do more chores around the house, etc. Take on more responsibility without being asked. Things along those lines.

I really hope things work out for you!

 

Overprotective parents can be really hard to deal with. I was there for quite a while too, so I can totally relate. I remember this one day, though, my Mom and I had this huge fight and all this stuff came out about how I felt trapped at home by their rules and how they never let me do anything...next thing I knew we were both bawling and things were a little better after that. (and two years later I went away to school so... then I had no rules at all lol) I don't know if you can sit down and talk to your parents, everyone's relationship with their folks is different. But anyway if it helps, just know you're not alone!

 

just wait till yoru 18. I say start planning now collecting things( to live on your own) and networking with people who want to move out of their houses so maybe you can have a roomate ... when your parents see that you are serious about being responsable then they will trust you.

I'll never understand thos e people who are under their parents rule till they are into their 20's....you have to take control of your own life.