Stoner Mathematics, the key to an Easy Ride

When you're baked, do you find it difficult to make what you might realise are quite mundane decisions?

When you're wasted, do you despair at the choice of operating the microwave, or simply slapping some odds and ends together into a sandwich?

Well, for a while, I've had a solution that I'd like you all to help expand on

Its called "Stoner Mathematics". A while ago, I was faced with a decision, one i can't remember obviously, but i was stuck, stoned and hungry (munchies, it was probably for munchies...ah yes, it comes back to me):

I was in town, and i wanted some food; it was past 5, so much of the shops were shut. I could either walk down to the bottom of town (its two main streets at a right angle to eachother on a large, large hill) to the local Kebaby where the food isn't very...fulfilling, or i could walk uptown to a decent fish and chip shop. It was raining, and the wind was blowing into the face of people walking up the hill. I also had to be somewhere quite quickly, so time was an issue as well.

What did i do, you ask? Well you know, i can't remember the choice

But,I used Stoner Mathematics. It basically involves whittling down all the little quirks you have with the choices of action, until you are faced with an often enlightening and uplifting solution.

Any insight?

 

Yea i find it difficult to make decisions in general, so when im stoned it's difficult to make decisions, so I just make a simple, easy decision and stick with it. When I first saw the title of this thread I thought it was about how well stoners do mathematics, or doing mathematics while stoned.

 

What the F*** are you talking about. You are freaking me the F*** out!!!hahahahaha

 

Personally, I like fish and chips, so I would have gone there, but I know exactly what you are talking about, though here we call this "Stoner Logic".

Depending on who im with, decisions on eating and going places while stoned are either settled very quickly or with much debate. It all depends on the question. Sometimes something pops up that everyone agrees on and were all out the door before we stop to think if we had anything else to do. Other times we argue over and over about what to do even when there's really only one action possible, so we sit and bitch about it and then eventually end up careying it out or everyone gets upset and we don't do anything and just watch TV and drink beer and continue to smoke.
Sometimes there's many thing's to do, and this is usually setteled by the first person who gets up to go do what they want to do, and more often than not everyone follows...

 

Yeah, I'm a vego so I would have just got some chips if they cooked in vege oil!


TFS

 

Yeah I make decisions like that.. my friend lives in the ghetto, and I was at his house and had to make a decision:

To risk it and drink the tap water (probably bad)
or
To get some bottled water out of his fridge and drink that.

Then I saw two choices of cups:

Some cups on the table, or some cups on the counter.. I went with the ones on the counter.

 

yeah, i find it was easier when i smoked to weigh my options.

 

Yeah, I have a difficult time with dilemmas when I'm high. One time when I was over at a friends and had $50 for a halfO, my friend was trying to ask me which dealer I wanted to get through. I couldn't make up my mind. I'm not sure how, but finally we decided on one.

Happens to me with speech, too. Someone asks me a question, and of all the possible answers, I can't choose between them all.

 

Who drinks bottled water out of a cup?!!! Or does that mean you decided to go with the tap water? I'm dying to know.

 

lol I don't think he knows

but anyway I have this problem where I'm munching out and no matter what I do I can't get of my ass and walk the 50 meters to the 7-11. I guess my brain just decides better to go with out then actually put effort into something.

 

It was a big gallon jug (like a milk jug) that was filled with good water..

And I did something else stupid at the same place yesterday. My girlfriend asked me to get her some ice (for cottonmouth) so I came back with the ice in my hand..I didn't even think to get a cup or anything hahahaah it was so funny but so stupid too.

 

I had another one the other day, but i use this so much, its kinda part of me, so i didn't think about this until now....

I went to the beach for a swim (after my run) and thought, should i smoke this pre-rolled blunt now, or on that rock in the water, or in the water, risking it getting wet. I went onto the rock, then decided to slide oh so gracefully into the water (the angle looked right)

It wasn't. I felt my back scratching against all the barnacles and rough bits which i just happened to not see on first inspection - no worries, the blunt stayed dry.

Keep em coming, stoner mathematics (and philosophy, literature, astronomy and all sorts of sub-specific areas of human study) will help you, help the world