So what happend after...?

yeah i cant really say it any better then elfin. been there done that shit and i agree. fix your shit while you still can man. your posts sound more and more fucked up lately. not trying to scare you, but give your brain a rest mate.

 

About a month ago I had my first somewhat bad trip. It was on magic mushrooms. On LSD I haven't even come close to a bad trip while on shrooms I felt pretty uncomfortable for some things while still enjoying them.
I also thought I couldn't have a bad trip and that I could handle everything.

Wrong thought! Don't ever think that; medical shit may happen to friends and most likely you'll still be scared a lot.

So basically I had a good reason to freak out that trip, and I wasn't exactely reacting in an unlogical way, I did all the stuff I had to do. So basically this is what happened. Me and a friend had been experimenting a lot with LSD recently and forgetting about shrooms a bit and especially I used to be love them before LSD and she never minded doing them much so we figured we'd do them once before the possible ban would come up and stuff (it still hasn't). At first, it was a lot of fun. She wasn't particulairy enjoying herself; but I was. She was first saying it was too light and after that she felt weird. I was just enjoying my chaotic mental state.
At some point she stood up from the couch we were sitting on because I told her I'd move my cat so she could actually sit comfortably and while she was standing she said she felt extra weird, and that everything had gotten darker all the sudden. She said she had to sit down and right after she did her head fell back, eyes rolled away and she started to make really fucking terrifying sounds, as if she was chocking. The nasty part was; she didn't wake up. I repeated her name and she didn't respond.
Now my mother who was asleep knew we had taken shrooms and told me to come talk to her whenever something was wrong. I thought this was pretty wrong so I started to scream she had to wake up (I didn't wanna leave my friend alone in that state really); luckely my mum responded to the high pitched loud "MOM they're something wrong with ..!!!!".
My mother started to shake her a little saying her name loud and eventually she woke up disorentated. Then she got all red and started to sweat and asked where she was an felt weird. I still do not know if she moved while passed out or not, as thats probably what happened: she just passed out.
Now the thing is; I ate a few more, and I'm a lot thinner and weight a lot less then her. At first, I didn't know if it was her or the shrooms. She never passed out while I have a naturally low blood pressure and get the black before eyes while tanding up thing every single day again. Affraid on that point as I was I sat on the floor until I knew more (i.o.w.: time had passed).
After about an hour I considred myself safe and rolled me a spliff and I could go back to enjoying it a little. Still though I couldnt'get the image of her passed out face out of my head, and for 2-3 weeks I couldn't. Everytime in that room in my house at night I had to think about it etc.

That didn't stop until last weekends (a week ago) LSD trip. Taking LSD fixed my brain up. I feel safe again in my own house since that trip.

 

well for some reason, if yous didnt read the trip report i wrote in the magic forums, here you go. i dont plan to re-read it myself tho, thats for sure.

i tripped on about 4 grams of shrooms last weekend, and the same dose just on the weeked that passed.

first week was amazing.
the one that just passed was fucked.
i was with my friend, at his house, things were amazing, then we smoked a few cones and he went to bed cause he didnt take shrooms. so i end up sitting downstairs, after 5 minits things go worse and worse.
soo frightfull, i couldnt move out of my seat, i was shaking, i had no grip on nothin, i saw spiders, i saw alien shadows, i jumped at creaking sounds, i couldnt stand properly, the walls were all in out waving, pictures growing and getting smaller with the type of music. my mind told itself i was going insane, everything i had realised on acid, i had now re-realised new things over it, in a way that was a tormenting mindfuck of insanity. like i was questioning the things i had allready questioned. getting further and further disconnected.
iv never had such a distorted perception of self, distorted feeling of self.
for hours i was tryin to talk myself down in my mind, so many harsh realisations about myself. all about how bad the drugs are, my fucked up life, the way iv been acting, how i act, looking at the time was tormenting as fuck. 3 minits of terror, felt like an unexplainable amount of time. just waiting for it to go away.
i had no grip on anything, so i took out my phone and tried to read the messages in my inbox, and the familuarty grounded me a li'l, it helped to concentrate on it, i had no clue how to function anything else like put on a movie.
the back door was open, and some beautfull little kitten came in, and it was amazing, tho i was still terrified. waking my friend was thought on my mind for a while. i wouldnt wake him unless i was truelly terrified.
i used the cat as a kind of excuse to wake him. i prob sounded nuts, but i was tellin him there was a cat inside the house, and i was freakin out. im like im freakin out man. i need help. im freakin out, but no cause of the cat. but he never really woke up cause he was pretty trashed..

good trips can be ego boosts, i just feel like now like this will bring my ego down. i can allready feel like it has.

first bad trip. anyone with bad trips, do you think they'll be much impact on me?
i feel like i need to fix my life and never want to take drugs again, i doint know how long that will last, but we'll see.

 

im pretty good from that, i just posted it anyway. i think now im headed in a more positve direction.
i taken a few days off work to relax.

 

ok, now i am sure you are expecting that i would say something like this. did you read my post or did you not consider it good advice? i am not going to get into a big elaborate post about alcohol but i will say that you are not making the right decision by choosing alcohol. sure, it will be much easier for you to find a girlfriend that drinks than it will be to find a girl who likes drugs. the problem is the kind of girl you will find will be much different. giving up on drugs only to use alcohol instead is like conforming to what the system wants.

i am just going to tell you what i think would be better for you and you go and do what ever you want. i know i dont have to say that but maybe saying it will help you understand that i do realize the decision is yours to make and as much as i would like for you to hear me i do not want to shove it down your throat....

if you were to smoke weed on a regular basis (every day but not too much or you will burn out from that) (i share 1-3 joints with my wife and i never burn out - if i have to go to work or take care of some business i hold off on smoking a joint till after i am done), and use psychedelic drugs once a month(no more than twice a month and spacing them out even more than one month might be a good idea), and use mdma no more than twice a year if any.... if you were to live your life in this way or something similar you could benefit from all the wonders of a psychedelic lifestyle. of course you would have to practice other ways of achieving enlightenment like meditation, yoga, reading some good books and all the wonders of meeting new trippy friends to learn and grow with. choosing to live your life this way would be good for you in many ways but can not come from a desire to get high or wasted - it must come from a willingness to explore the many wonders of who you are and a personal decision to seek your own spiritual enlightenment.

you obviously have had enough of doing drugs for the reasons that you do. that is why i suggest that you find good reasons to continue. you started using these drugs for one reason or another but it is time you realized that there are better reasons to do some of the drugs you were doing (LSD and mushrooms)... if you can not find any good reason to trip on psychedelic drugs than you are probably right to seek out a mediocre life of drinking yourself silly like the rest of the blind rat race!

and i would like you to read this again...

honestly you dont know what you are missing... right now drugs are what they are for you but trust me there is way more to it than what you have experienced... the best is yet to come - if you do it with the right intention.

 

couldnt say it any better. good post 3xi!

 

Aw you poor girl! And I feel sorry for you friend
That does sound like a bum trip, but at least your mom is cool with you two eating magic mushrooms! I wish my mom was that cool. Anyway we live and learn, better luck next time Ayz and God bless you and your friend.
Om shanti and namaste family -

 

I have had the EXACT same expeirence on mushrooms. It was horrrible but 4 hours into the trip I ate 4 tabs of the amazing blotter I used to get. At first it seemed that I was completely sober and this went on for about 20 minutes and then the acid slammed me. Didnt even feel the come up at all. Best night of my life. As for the re-realizations; it was a rough expierience but the acid helped me make sense of the expierence. This trip changed my life in such a huge way and I am ever so greatful for it.

 

3xi smoking weed isnt to much my thing. i love smoking weed occasionsally, either coming down from certain drugs particularly E. or with some friends in a really nice bush. but smoking weed everyday for me is a absolue no. iv done it many times, and its never worked out. it makes me way to un-motivated, makes everything so diffucult, my mind gets way to clouded, and it makes me very unsane after several weeks of daily usage. ofcourse its differnt for everyone but not a daily thing for me. i think even weed is somthing you cant do everyday, its just a habit, and it has its impact on your life no matter what you think.
as for alchole, i know from previous posts your opinion on alcohole, and whilst alchole can cause alot of bad from many instances which i wont even go into, it can also be good, fun and social. if you can handle your alchole, have fun, not make an ass out of yourself while your on it, and it doesnt make you violent or angry, or get into fights, than alchole can be a very good choice. it doesnt drain you mentally like other drugs.
any persons opinion on somthing in this case alchole, is allways based on their first impressions with it, or if its impacted their life or childhood negitivly, or any other reasons. see somone who has a bad lsd trip their first time, is most likely never to do lsd again, and have a negative opiniion on it and wary people of its effects, unknown that for some it is the most amazing expereince. warning them it will just fuck them up or somthing.

alchole will make bad people do bad things, iv never been agressive or been in a fight from drinking, cause thats just not me. the more alchole you drink, and more you get used to alchole, the better you can controll yourself no matter how intoxicated you are, thus not making a fool out of yourself, which would be one of the biggest downfalls for some about alchole.
im not saying that these things happen to you, but all my postive, fun, and social times iv had from alchole have been good, and as allways, moderation is the key. id only drink once a week.

 

alcohol will be a great way for you to go

honestly, who cares if you are not into smoking weed everyday. that really is not my point. i was trying to give you a relatively healthy way to get high on a regular basis without fucking yourself up. you think weed causes that much of a problem yet you are willing to consume hundreds of pills. you obviously know what you are talking about. weed is not for everyone, and for you to suggest that it must be fucking up my motivation or whatever is crossing a line. i have been smoking weed for long enough - if it hurt my motivation i wouldnt be a musician who works a full time job who can still find the time to have more than 50 songs written. bob marley worked in a factory until he had enough money to record an album. there are many pot heads who have made a very good name for themselves in many walks of life.

giving up on drugs is probably a good idea for you. but it really is sad to hear about someone who could take that much LSD and still not snap out of it. i guess it happens all the time - people trippin out every weekend having a great time until they have a powerful trip and decide that it might be better to do what everyone else does. hey, at least your parents will be proud!

i dont mean to be an ass. just cant help being honest. the psychedelic lifestyle is not what you think - that much is obvious. you cant find any reason to continue with such drugs and probably shouldnt have tried in the first place - you were doing it for the wrong reasons. your reasons for getting intoxicated fit well with alcohol, coke, and e but not with psychedelic drugs. you are making a very good decision. i wish you all the best.

 

dayyyyummmm. tru dat.

 

my perspective on the psychadelic lifestyle only changed so dramatically since those 2 shroom trips. before that i was keen as anything about psychadelics.
its all just perspective, and those shrooms trips shook up my perspective and made me see things from even more differnt ways. these trips we have can put us in any number of differnt perspectives. whether or not just a coping method for my mind to cope, perhaps it told me things about lsd that arent real. in that, since those shroom trips, all the crazy, trippy stuff i had been startin to think up and beleive, i have now realised are for the most part, just crazy and trippy.

ofcourse, shrooms taught me drugs are just differnt forms of poison that give us 'pleasureable experiecees, compared to posions that dont, and lsd is just overloading our brains, frying our brains, and making us insane.
ofcourse i still dont beleive that 100%, and lsd i beleive yes does overload our brain, but by doing so, we learn a hell of a lot. i dont know.

ofcourse during a 'bad trip', it brings you down from the fantasy world that an amazing lsd experience will take you, back down to earth.
a mechanism to cope, you become a bit disconnected and your brain tells you none of it is real, maybe it has to too cope.

just shrooms, i dont really like shooms.

most importantly, dont say i did acid for the wrong reasons. i was never one to take acid just to get fucked up. i was allways the one out of our group who allways had the most amazing discoveries, and talked some of the weirdest shit.

 

hey or you know, it all just depends on perspective.
maybe i got myself out of this shit, got my life back on track. and wont be insane from acid for the rest of my life. i can be a respectable person in this world, and be able to form conversations with normal people. people wont think im a nutcase, i wont have a mindfuck all the time, and their wont feel like an infinte empty void inside my head.
ill be happy, i wont be so lost in thought, and have hppd. but i will have had one good thing about acid, it has opened doors, but when is enough? how many doors do you have to open?
dont worry, im just being a bitch. but seriouisly, its all just differnt perspectives.
i think psychadelics open your mind to lots, but at the same time, close doors to others in a significant way. and a bad trip is merely just a big realisation that had to come out in one way or another. its bad cause the realisation is so big, and you dont want to come down from such a hi almighty place, to such a harsh reality. gettin to grips with the real world.
ofcourse even if i stopped all drugs for a year, then took acid a few more times in my life. you know. anything.dont even know what im on about anymore.

but theres allot of differnt ways to experience life. and not any one of them is really better than another, just as long as you enjoy it, and make the mosts out of it. and theirs nothing wrong with drinking and doing what "everyone else does", unless the only reason you take drugs is an attempt to try and be differnt, cause you dont fit in with "everyone else".

 

Peter, I think it is important you decide to appreciate life without drugs. Purify all of your motives and take at least a few months to accept and appreciate life.

 

yeah dude. lay off the fuckin pills. they fuck your brain up worse then anything.

 

I had a pretty bad trip on shrooms when I was younger. I was staying with my father, he had a cow pasture next door, and i was tripping one night and for no reason really after everyone else went to bed I just started freaking out. I thought I was dying and I woke my dad up so he could bring me to the hospital (lol I didn't really go. He laughed at me and talked to me until I fell asleep). I thought I had died, I saw my body on the couch and everything. Anyway, after that I had anxiety attacks every time I would have to stay the night somewhere other than my home. It eventually stopped and I believe the bad trip just triggered an underlying problem. I've always experienced anxiety when I was away from home so something about that night seems to have started the anxiety attacks.

 

so i was doing a little research on this whole persective thing, and had this msn convo with someone who i talk with alot at work, a girl, who i would have thought was an ok friend sort of. well this is what she thinks of people who take drugs. and she knows i take drugs, we talk about it somtimes.

after some general discusion about drinking and drugs...
me:
do you think it would be harder to be friends with a person who took drugs, regardless of how nice or mean a person they were? i think alot of people have the perspective that people who take drugs are bad people, but after alof of realisations after this trip (which was prob ultimatly good), its made me think about this shit, and that i dont want to take drugs, and have people have those opi
marcus says:
opnions of me
marcus says:
expescially say, tryin to find a girlfriend, unless they take drugs themselves, there gonna have that same view...
marcus says:
bah. dont worry. im just tryin to crack into the minds of differnt people, and their differnt perspectives
l i s says:
yeh nah thats 0ok
l i s says:
bt it is harder to be friends with a person who does drugs
l i s says:
to be honest i wouldnt necessarily want to be friends with ppl who do drugs
--edit- me says:
exactly
l i s says:
or generally associate with them

so you know, fuck that shit. somone i thought was an ok friend thinks that shit. well you know fuck this.

well i thought fuck this, so i posted back.




but oh well. you dont have to assoicate with me anymore. that sucks. i new people hated people who they thought took drugs. thanks again. im off to bed

l i s says:

wat

l i s says:

i dont hate u

------edit says:

to be honest i wouldnt necessarily want to be friends with ppl who do drugs

l i s says:

or generally associate with them .

thats exactly what iv been tryin to gather, its just the perspective that people dont like people who take drugs, and that their taught to stay away from them, that their bad people, that sort of thing.
l i s says:

yeh bt i knew u before i knew u did drugs

-------edit says:

yeah

l i s says:

the fact that u do drugs doesnt change my perception of u because i got to know u frist

--edit says:

hopfully. cause iv allways thought you were a pretty awsum chick, and it sucks to have the harsh realisation that suddenly everyone you thought you may have been friends with who didnt take drugs, secretly doesnt really like you at all. see thats where im coming from,

edit----me says:

see this is what drugs do, they play with your mind, dont worry. iv just learnt from it, i dont want to take drugs and now i can see from others perspectives its all good.

l i s says:

yeh thats good

l i s says:

im proud of u

l i s says:

yay!!

---edit says:

heh

 

ya, buddy, thats right - i like to do LSD to be different... thats it, you have it all figured out. if you have read even half of my posts in this forum you would realize that there are many reasons that one might use LSD and usually that has nothing to do with wanting to be different. sure, being someone who has walked a path of spiritual enlightenment for 10 years will automatically make you different than most but that is just a natural process and has little to do with the actual intention. my intention is and always will be to become the best person i can be this life time - i find that psychedelic drugs only make that process easier.

it was not the LSD that made you crazy man - you did that to your self. i have done more LSD than you can possibly imagine and i dont suffer any of the symptoms you mention because i use it wisely. that is and always was my point... the reason why you are now afraid of psychedelic drugs is because you A - did them for the wrong reasons and B - abused them.

(you say)LSD closes doors in significant ways??? maybe with your lack of respect but in my situation the only doors that were closed were the ones i closed my self. (like i never want to meet another girl from a bar again - that was my own choice for obvious reasons - well maybe not obvious for most of the blind fools but obvious for some)

so it is all about perspectives eh? thats a good one. so if you think it is a good idea to start raping little girls it is ok as long as you are happy doing it. you say it doesnt matter what you do as long as you are happy because that is what life is about. that is a very convenient way of thinking for someone who doesnt care about becoming a better person.

life is not about doing whatever it takes to make you happy. because a lot of times what you think makes you happy (like getting wasted at a bar) does not actually make you happy in the long run. by your philosophy we should all have a drink in our hands at all times - at least that way we would always be happy. what about when you have to wake up in the morning hung over as shit... what will you do then to make yourself happy - have another drink.

there are many ways to live ones life in a beneficial way without the use of psychedelic drugs. the sad thing is that in western society most people never find a path towards spiritual enlightenment amongst all the chaos. most people are too busy with there pointless obligations to ever care about what they are really here for. we are not here to waste away doing what the government wants us to do (work, pay taxes and ask no questions,,, and oh i almost forgot - drink alcohol to make all that easier to do),,, we are here to find love and learn how to be wonderful loving people who live in harmony with our environment. unfortunately in western society it takes a drug as strong as LSD to wake people up from their slumber and in most cases it takes a lot of LSD. - so many people try it a few times only to fall back into their meaningless lives.

it really sucks when people like you abuse and use a drug for the wrong reasons because now you are going to go and give LSD a bad rap. if only you knew what you were getting into you could have used it more wisely and not had such a bad experience.

LSD did not close the doors man - you did.

i think it is a great idea for you to lay off the drugs for a while. maybe you could realize that alcohol is also a drug (and considered one of the worst by many)... if you are the type of person to abuse drugs like LSD you will certainly have a difficult time with alcohol. you are going to do the same with alcohol that you did with other drugs - you are going to abuse it. you need to give all drugs a break and find who you are. learn how to make yourself happy without a substance. unfortunately for you this would probably take a couple of years and i dont think you are going to make it one week without looking for the party.

i am not sure if you can tell and i hope you read down far enough to get this point... i speak up because i actually care about you. i feel bad for you - i wish you had a better experience with psychedelic drugs. your outlook seems dangerous to me for many reasons. i dont think you will recover from what you have done to yourself for a very long time and it sucks that you are going to blame the drugs and not yourself. for months now i have been trying to get you to adopt a healthier pattern of drug use. one of the reasons i post on these forums is to help inexperienced users find a positive and productive perspective. not all perspectives are good and you will never get away with believing that some perspectives are true when they are not - karma will always take the time to enlighten you.

i think that what would be best for you at this point would be to start meditating and learning how to live a healthy lifestyle.

alcohol is a big mistake - especially for someone in your shoes.

 

someone who thinks it is a bad idea to be friends with someone who uses drugs is prejudice. they are discriminating against people they know nothing about. not all drugs are bad and not all people who use them are bad. if you want to give up on some good mind expanding drugs so that you can go and be friends with a bunch of narrow minded prejudice fools – go right ahead.


in fact - the beatles used lots of drugs and they are one of the most respected musical groups ever!

 

i updated that msn convo, read it above