So my boyfriend just...

Woke me up fondling my clit, jacked himself off and then said he had a mandatory meeting he was going to be late for and walked out...

Feeling a little used right now... And when I expressed that, he just got mad at me, saying "I really don't have time for this right now." and "Fine, I will never touch you again unless I can finish you too."

Wtf? I just don't like the fact that he doesn't consider my feelings and that he used me and I didn't even know what was going on at first... I just fucking woke up, I don't know shit right now. All I know is I feel hurt...

 

why would he not try and wake you first....maybe get you to help out instead od lying there like a dead person

i'm old school...shit like that creeps me

 

It is a bit strange.

 

my gf loves when I wake her up with intercourse, or playing with her vagina when shes sleeping.

some women like it, some dont.

 

who the fuck wacks off when there is a live woman right beside you....what am I missing?

 

I would have loved it... If he had included me a bit more or made an effort to give me something in return, but he didn't. Just took what he wanted without asking, leaving me all hot and bothered and wondering what the hell just happened. Now I have to carry this around for 10 and a half hours at work... Cool. Glad he got a good start to his day...

I've left him a note. Hopefully it will articulate my feelings better than I did this morning...

 

He didn't have time for me. He said he just did it to wake himself up.

 

dudes don't wack off in order to wake up....kind of a well known fact ejaculation releases the sleepy endorphins etc....that's why dudes roll over and pass out

dudes wack off when there is no women or when there is a woman later in the day and we don't wanna cum too fast

 

actually, depends on the time of day, or sex cycle of the male. not all men get tired, some gain energy, however short lived it is. he sought resolution to be less distracted during the day/meeting. however he just used his partner to the point shes uncomfortable.
was it fair? No.. why did he bother waking you up with so little time, could of just handled that himself in the bathroom.

how long does it take you to cum, can you get off under pressure, does he know how to get you off quickly or do you need more time 7min/15min?
running late is no excuse, unless hes really going to lose his job over it.


he would of gained more focus had he reached plateau before ejaculation and prevented orgasm. but Ive the feeling hes a little selfish and gains very little thru his sexual behavior other than self gratification..

 

Maybe he just wanted to get rid of his morning wood quickly. If your in a hurry that shit gets in the way when it doesnt want to deflate

 

I've suspected this about him for a while. This isn't the first time he's made me feel used. He's good at being very romantic and reeling me in then saying something like "sometimes sex is just sex" when I feel like we've just shared something meaningful. Apparently sex isn't just sex to me. I guess I'm just lame that way.
He says he loves me and I love him, and sometimes I feel like he just doesn't understand where I'm coming from more than he's actually out to hurt me... I'm not saying it has to be champagne and rose petals and chocolates all the damn time, but a little tact will go a long way in making me feel like I'm not just there to scratch an itch for him. It just makes me feel like I am being reduced to little more than another one of his sex toys...

 

communication. while you may feel hurt now. it brings the issue to light. you 2 need to talk.
you should explain why you need to have an orgasm or more bonding, less feeling like a sex object/used.. He may not be 100% consciously aware of his actions.

 

OP, I totally know how you feel (more so because I've been in your BF's shoes before). I don't know that this will cushion the blow, but let me just lay this out there and you can take from it what you will. Guys sometimes have erotic dreams throughout the night and often wake up with raging hardons, hornier than hell. So it probably was on this particular day he woke up unbelievably horny, started spanking, looked over and started fondling you.

Now here's what things boil down to...

From his perspective he woke up horny (probably horny for you), started jerking the chain and fondling you, maybe just to get him to completion or maybe to see if perhaps you might just happen to be waking up and be in the mood, but obviously he finished by himself, meaning either you weren't receptive (from his perspective) or he just blew his load and boom he's off to his day. Most of what is going on here is raw man sex drive stuff, nothing deep.

From your perspective you're in a peaceful sleep and awoke by your BF fondling your junk, rocking the bead and moaning. Now at this point I assume you're either disgusted, confused, sleepy or whatever. But obviously you didn't wake up horny too or you probably would have turned toward him and had some stinky morning sex.

Bottom line, guys are similar to dogs in that we are instinctive, horny, and simply in the moment. You by all rights can tell him you are offended by his actions, feel used and all that and I totally get where you are coming from. But let me ask you this, if he had woken up, then lightly woken you and said "Honey I'm very horny, can we have a quickie before I go to work?" what would you have done? If you'd have been receptive then by all means tell him that and next time things might be different. If it disgusts you, well then welcome to the world of guys beating off to porn and pick your battles...

 

hHow long would a scenario last like this for me? NOT LONG!

Anyway, do communicate...but do not attack your points across...as that just closes people down when you attack them.

 

Cracked myself up,as I was going to further with the comment i made in my head...when people feel attacked, they close down, or get angry and the thing just escalates into a furied mess.....escalates or ejaculates....hahahaha...ok, am going silly again, I know...bad joke.,

 

I guess what I should have added to my post (if it wasn't already obvious). If any girl woke up their guy by fondling his junk, that guy is going to wake up smiling and go with it. When a girl is woken up the same way, what does a girl do??? Well I can't answer that. But that about sums up the balance here because rarely do you hear about a woman waking up horny fondling their man's junk to try and get him kick started, probably because it never happens or is met with a good response

Difference between men and woman...

 

If you talk about it and it happens again...turn the tables on him. Wake him up with a blow job and just as he is waking up and realizing what is going on....say "Ooooh...so sorry. I just got myself off and now I have to run. Have a good day though."

 

See that wouldn't really work though Wiz. If I woke up to my wife blowing me for one I'd be like "Fuck yeah!!!" and if in the midst of it she said "Oh shit I gotta go" I wouldn't be pissed or violated. I'd finish myself off and say "Ya gotta go, well thanks for the blow!"

So yeah that shit doesn't really work to well when turned around. Nice try though

 

What is your sex life usually like? Are you sexually compatible? If not then that's not good..

I imagined myself in your scenario and imagined the guy being my ex boyfriend (since things like this did happen between us.. sometimes he'd wake me up and sometimes I'd wake him up). I was very sexually compatible and comfortable with him and I have to say, I think I'm in the minority here because, I would find it very hot if I woke up to him fondling me.

I would be turned on and join right in. I'm a very sexual person and ready to go anytime. If he said he was late for work, I'd understand and just get myself off and I think it'd be rather easy because I would be thinking about how the first thing he wanted to do in the morning was have sex with me..

But I do feel sympathy toward you because not everyone is going to be comfortable in this type of situation and he should respect that. So you should discuss it more with him and tell him how it makes you feel.

 

He waited for me to come home to read the note so we could talk about it right away. He said he felt terrible that that's how it made me feel and that he had no idea I would react that way. I still think we have two very different viewpoints on sex, but I think we have enough common ground in the middle to compromise. Thank you everyone who shared viewpoints. I might be back to discuss more but for now I'm snuggling up with the boy and watching the tube with some chocolate cake he made for us.