OK, so to most people hair is just hair, but to me it holds energies of past experiences and spiritual strength. This past Thanksgiving I decided to give up the hairbrush, give up fancy schmancy hair products and use one all-purpose soap, and give the dreadlock thing a go. They're just now to the point where they really look like dreads and they're looking pretty awesome. The thing is, I'm wondering if maybe I've picked the wrong time in my life to have them. Things seem to be coming to a head at work, and I am really getting to the point where I'd like to start the hunt for a new job, one with better pay and benefits if possible, but definitely something less stressful on my body and my mind alike. The only other jobs in my college town I could possibly find WITH dreads would be in the foodservice and retail sector, which I'm desperately trying to get away from. I could possibly do a phone job, but that's not a permanent solution to me. I'd ideally like to do something where I'm helping improve lives, like some kind of social service job. The thing is for those kinds of jobs you often have to look professional, and unfortunately if you're caucasion with dreads, there are a lot of negative stereotypes that go along with it. It isn't right, but it does exist Also, these last couple years of my life have been full of extreme up's and downs, emotional torment and stress. Do I really want the hair that I had during that time sticking on top of my head? Do I need to keep those energies around? If I'm trying to move forward with life (and I am), is hanging on to my hair going to help? I remember when me and my ex first broke up (now going on two years ago), the first thing I wanted to do was cut all my hair off, but everyone around me told me not to, that it was soooooo pretty and I should keep it. Looking back I wish I'd gotten the shortest haircut possible. I think the symbolic act of the shorn locks of my lost love would have helped make for a cleaner break...sound silly? I don't think so... I just don't know why I'm agonizing over this. It's just hair, right? But dammit, I like how I no longer have to brush it 8 zillion times a day, how I only have to wash it once a week and it stays clean! It's so easy to maintain, and it's gotten me to focus less on the material and more on the internal. Also, I've seemed to become emotionally attached to them. I know if I cut them off so soon without even letting them mature, I'll be sad about it, at least for awhile. In fact, the thought of letting them go is making me tear up a bit. It's more than just a look or a hairstyle, it's a part of my ongoing efforts to live a sustainable lifestyle, and it's intensely personal for me. So I'm kind of agonizing over this...and it sucks. Many with dreads say that when they cut their dreads off, everything changed for either the better or the worse...so that's another thing that I'm sort of scared of. Those who've said those things have said that when everything was going well for them while they had dreads and they cut them off, things got worse for them after they cut them off, and vice/versa. Things have been a mixture of good and bad, but I wouldn't call my life horrible. Then again, things could definitely improve. So, I kind of really don't know what to do. Part of me really doesn't want to, but part of me knows it might be a good decision, and it's not like I couldn't try again in the future, once I'm in a more stable part of my life (after college and in the career field I want to go into, which is more dread-friendly, etc.).