Should tell him he is a narcissist or just let him go?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by kyndmushroom85, Mar 21, 2022.

  1. This guy I’ve known for many years has a lot of narcissistic traits and he seems completely oblivious to them. We have had an on and off friendship because I always end up saying something to him that upsets him and he gets very mad if someone doesn’t agree with his way of thinking or his opinions. He is extremely self absorbed and I feel that I have always been very patient with him and I know when to walk to away and give him space. He has often complained to me about his relationships and why they never work out. Of course he tends to see the faults in his partners but never himself. I am terrified to tell him the truth about his behavior because I know once that happens, I will be the devil in his eyes. I’m kind of just to the point where I’m ready to put an end to our friendship and wish him the best. I’m just tired of him popping into my life when it’s convenient for him and he is so emotionally exhausting. A small part of me wants to tell him that he is completely psychotic, controlling and women run from him because he thinks he is above them. He is extremely argumentative and will not let things go. My question is, should I tell him or just let him go do his thing in life? I feel like he needs to know because he will never have a good healthy relationship if women don’t break the truth to him or they sugar coat it just to get him away from them. But also I don’t know what he will do if I break it to him. So I’m hoping someone outside of the box can advise me on the right thing to do.
    scratcho likes this.
  2. NookaTheNook

    NookaTheNook Members

    This person is causing you to be very unhappy, I think you could do better in life without this friendship, so he will be annoyed, we are all the bad guy in someone’s story. It should not be down to you to tell him how wrong he is especially if your going to suffer for it, once he has lost a good friend maybe he will think about his actions.this person is definitely not good for you.
    kyndmushroom85 and scratcho like this.
  3. scratcho

    scratcho Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

    A narcissist will never take advice as you wish to tell him. Just cut him loose. I assume you didn't take him to raise.
    Ray Roberts and kyndmushroom85 like this.
  4. I was thinking this also. I have a feeling that it would be almost useless telling him because he would just convince himself that I was a horrible person and didn’t know what I was talking about but not really hear what I was telling him or take into account the purpose of me telling him. It would be bad, very bad.
    Ray Roberts and scratcho like this.
  5. scratcho

    scratcho Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

    Make it easy on yourself.:D
    kyndmushroom85 likes this.
  6. T
    He does often make me unhappy. There are good things about him but the narcissist behavior far outweighs the good. He looks for things to argue about, he gets some sort of a high from it. I have definitely decided to walk away from my friendship with him because he is draining my energy mentally and spiritually. I just wasn’t sure if it was for his own good to know the truth about his behavior. I do want him to be happy and find love.
    NookaTheNook and scratcho like this.
  7. NookaTheNook

    NookaTheNook Members

    Let’s hope he does, but not at the expense of your own happiness.
    kyndmushroom85 and scratcho like this.
  8. Twogigahz

    Twogigahz Members

    Just walk away, let it fizzle out, unless you enjoy being treated like this.

    People like this will never change. There's just some high they get about being angry about everything. He will always be right. He will never see the good in anything. Nobody is as smart as he is. Everyone is out to get theirs, which should really be his. You're an ass if you don't see things his way. Everyone is dishonest, except it's ok for him to cheat. He doesn't feel the rules apply to him. Women are blind to him being the perfect man. They enjoy being with like minded people so they can bitch about everything and solve nothing.

    I've decided life it too short to be associated with people like this. All they do is pass their anger along - stress infectors...
    kyndmushroom85 and scratcho like this.
  9. drock69

    drock69 Members

    If you have to ask weather you need to let someone go, you need to let ‘em go!
    scratcho likes this.
  10. grower88

    grower88 Members

    A narcissist will never listen to anything, cut your losses and move on.
  11. Percyjackson1790

    Percyjackson1790 Senior Member

    Sounds like you’re unhappy so exit however you see fit.

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