Short Rhymes

I love your work

 

Jack and Jill went up the hill to catch a pitch of water
Jack fall down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after
Jack and Jill both have good fund me pages for hospital bills and rehab afterwords

 

Mary Mary, quite contrary
How does your belly grow?
Ask Tommy Tucker,
The little fucker;
He ought to know.
____________________________________________________________

Not mine.

 

Mary Mary quite contrary
How does your belly grow?
With burgers and fries
And hot apple pies
Bagged up in an order to go.
____________________________________________

Storch, circa 1972.

 

Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow
And everywhere that Mary went she took a bus.

These aren't mine (besides the Miss Muffet one.) I read them in a book of jokes when I was a wee little boy.

 

When I was in the 7th grade, there was a kid whose last name was King. He was the son of a farmer, and he didn't know better than to brag his ass off about his harvest of carrots from his garden. So everyone called him carrot King. And one day I came up with a little upbeat snappy jingle.

Intro:

For the best blow-jobs in town,
It's the Carrot King.

For a nickel or a dime,
And fifty cents for overtime.
For a credit card
He'll blow you hard.
It's the Carrot King.
_________________________________________________________

Kids can be so cruel . . .

 

The air is bitter and biting:
Like the words you last spoke to me
I would bear the wind of a thousand Decembers
If from your frozen soul I could be free

Or, perhaps, I could warm you-
Thaw your clenched hands in my own
Press your cruel mouth to my mouth
Spread a warmth you have never known

 

I liked the Muffet one best.

 

God is God
God is great
So is Mick Jagger!
So is John Lennon!
Wait who were talking about?

 

As my ambulation of the Deist got suggests. If she's out there, she's long gone. It makes your life no less important.

 

"Eyes so wide, and lips so thick, gimme' Mick"

 

I do my best around noon and then after five I get all tired from medication. It is what it is.

 

Trying to hard to not forget you is like a trying to catch rain drops
Trying to put the pieces back together feels like acid on skin
Trying to forgive is like putting back together a broken egg
Loving you is like trying not to eat a sweet while dieting

 

Some roses are black
And violets are blue,
And if you won't love me
You will be too.

 

You run in the at mid-night in the rain
You drink beer with your breakfast and energy drink before bed
You dance to C-Span and Music bores you
You don't own a cell phone, computer or IPAD but somehow I found you on-line
You are you I will never understand you

 

One cold and frosty moonlit night
Whilst feeling restless, full of spite,
I left my home, went over field,
And found myself a bitter meal.

A dog had shown to challenge me;
She sensed my evil flowing free;
Attacked, but couldn't overcome.
She came too close, her neck was wrung.

Such foolish courage of mortal flesh
Not satisfied with run and fetch.
At least her blood-stained corpse was spared
The sight of how her bones were bared.

Those cold and frosty moonlit nights
When I would spread that touch of fright
Kept people to their house, secure.
For such as me there is no cure.

This is my prime
I ask of men
Their fear and blood
Again and again . . .

 

I liked that a lot

 

This thread reminds me of my very first rhyme. I was about 8 or 9 and, while walking home one fall morning I came up with it;

Spring has sprung
Summer's gone
And now it's time
For the Autumn song

I was so proud of myself and couldn't wait to get home and share it with my mother. When I did, she just laughed and said, "gone doesn't rhyme with song". Well, the way an 8 or 9 Y/O Oklahoma boy says it..., it does. That was the last time I ever shared anything I wrote with my mother. And, honestly, I never even liked her after that day.

If she had still been alive, I wouldn't have even told her about the teen books I wrote.

 

I miss your face so in every strange I see you eyes
I see you smile and see you cry
I see everything I will have to miss
I miss you voice and you talking to me
Since you have gone your everywhere

 

To say you did but didn't
to say you didn't but did
to say you a didn't and didn't
and to say you did and did

of which of these would you be
if you wanted a pickle or plum?