Share your fortune

My fortune cookie fortunes in no specific order.

Moderation in temper is always a virtue but moderation in principle is always a vice.

If you can shape it in your mind you will find it in your life.

People say you have sharp sense and superb intellect.

Fresh ideas are not always the best ideas.

Only listen to fortune cookie, disregard all other fortune telling units.

Live so that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.

That which you cannot give away, you don't possess; it possesses you.

Seek first to understand and then to be understood.

Please share yours

 

you will surprise yourself

you will experience dark and light

the universe will ignore your wishes, but may attempt to compensate

probabilities can be manipulated. your milege may vary

the unknown is debt free

nature is not procustian, but it is impartial

 

Beware of little expenses. Small leaks sink great ships.

Be assertive when decisive action is needed.

 

A very long time ago I came across one that said “look out for a duck in a raincoat”
I didn’t know what that meant exactly but at the time I was reading it, I was walking through a dark park on the way home and it started raining. I started running, and not because I didn’t want to get wet - I didn’t want to see a duck in a raincoat! Was creeped out about that for some reason!

 

"Man who stand on toilet, high on pot."

"Man who buy drowned cat pay for wet pussy."

"Man who fart in church sit in own pew."

"The difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is all a matter of taste."

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a great hand."

"It is better to have loved and lost than to have had loved and gotten syphilis."

"Man who drops soap in prison shower is super bummed."

"ERROR 404 - FORTUNE NOT FOUND"

 

This made me laugh Especially loved "Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a great hand."

 

I have a tendency to save fortunes, sometimes months or even years later I'll find some in a drawer somewhere or the bottom of my purse. The following list is from some I just found in a little pile together in a drawer I hardly ever go in.

"Today, be civil, but don't go out of your way to be over friendly."

"To go too far is as bad as to fall short."

"Well, why not? Admit it-- you'er intrigued."

"Explore your own world by working together with your friends."

The Chinese food restaurant I go to always gives me too many fortune cookies. As a result, I have a whole cookie jar full of fortune cookies, most of them probably too stale to eat, so I think I am just going to start opening them and posting them here instead.

 

Would love to see what they say

 

Lol, ok I skipped a day but I had Chinese food tonight so here are the fortunes

"Confidence is at a high."

"In life you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are."

"Failure is a dress rehearsal for success."

"Expect much of yourself and little of others."

 

Love these.
I've just realised. I've never had a fortune cookie. Lol

 

Really! Why not...I mean, they don't taste that great but they are always fun to read

 

Not something we get here. Don't understand why though

 

Well, it's a good thing I'm sharing then, lol

 

Lol. Yes.
I'll count that as having one . Than you

 

You are very welcome, lol

 

"Calamity is the touchstone of a brave mind."

 

"To shine is better than to reflect"

 

"Dare to dream, hope, believe, seek, feel, find, and love."

"Fastest way to find some thing you've lost is to replace it."

"Today is the day you let it go. Your chance will come."

 

So earlier I opened 4 fortune cookies because I have been forgetting to post them here. I open one, ate the cookie(still fresh), read the fortune. Open the second, taste the cookie spit it out(not so fresh), read the fortune. After having seen me throw the last one away my husband looks at me questioningly when I reach for a third. I say, as I pick it up and begin to unwrap it, "I'm not eating it anyway, I just want the fortune." I break the cookie open... no fortune, lol. Well, it happens every now and then that a cookie will have not gotten a fortune but having it happen at that exact moment was just priceless, I couldn't stop laughing!