Scary Men

have you ever been just glanced at by a guy and feel uncomfortable. Its like they have this scary man lust thing go through their eyes. I have been looked at by men who seemed like REAL men, not silly boys. Is it just me being young and growing up or are there just some really creepy men out there i have come across?

 

some of us are creeps....I dont know which kind I am....

 

there's some really creepy men out there. i tend to trust my instincts, they've never led me astray yet.

 

Well I just usually admire a womans beauty and leave it at that or sometimes give the girl a smile and she smiles back and I leave it at that.


Warlock

 

I don't think I am scary yet. When I am scary, I want to become real scary, having like mutated by radiation (from being tortured in a war) body parts, a robotic eye, just creepy......... ahahahahahha

 

there not starring at ya cause yer a girllie ....its cause yer from south dakota .....anyway get some backbone and stop your bullshit blaming others for your fear .

 

MoonWater,

Trust your instincts. That's what they're for. Yes, some people are really creepy and you can tell right away from their vibes.

Some creepy predator types will try to prey on young women because they think that those younger, less experienced women might doubt their own judgement and try to be nice to everyone, IMO. Just ignore them. You don't owe it to everyone who looks at you to pay attention to them, you know?

 

Yes, I have been in situations where just a glance made me feel creeped out. It happens in two main circumstances -- sometimes, I encounter a man who is just a complete sleazeball in a well lit public place and am creeped out. Sometimes, I probably overreact, but I get creeped out by some strange man just being too near me on a dark street or whatever because that's the kind of setting you always hear about when you hear of a stranger rape. It's happened plenty of times that I get my guard up and nothing happens, he just walks past me in a hurry to his destination... BUT, you never know when that situation will happen and you won't be overreacting. I'd rather be excessively standoffish (keep your distance, keep him in your peripheral vision, even to the point that he knows you are aware of his presence, but not make direct eye contact) than take that risk of not being on guard.

I know this is nitpicky, but would you please clarify this? Because, for me, a real man would never do anything to creep you out, and silly boys carries for me the connotation of just being silly, not creepy.... Creeps are in a class all their own.

 

Bugger off with that attitude! The suggestion that concerns about one's safety in the presence of a creepy individual is bullshit has no place in the current culture of rape we live in. What's the most recent stats on how many women have been raped?

There ARE some people out there who act like complete creeps. One who pays attention to her instincts will pick up on behaviors that she may not be able to articulate but that warn her of a potential danger. Often, this initial instinct will be shown to be true by observed behavior. What does that have to do with some "bullshit blaming others for your fear", a statement that sounds like you think she would be unjustified in avoiding this person who creeps her out?

 

i think he's one of the creepy ones and is probably therefore offended by all the women not liking him.

 

You might be right.

 

When I was younger I had a job supervising people with mental problems, I don't know the right way to put it, as we worked in a kitchen in the basement of a student union on a university campus. This really creepy guy started paying lots of attention to me. I did not encourage him, but I did let him talk to me as I worked. I thought he worked there because he always wore a toolbelt, hung around the clock when I was punching in and out, etc. I felt sorry for him because something seemed to be wrong with him, and I was, after all, working with the mentally handicapped.


He started bringing me gifts and notes. I didn't read the notes or accept the gifts. I explained to him very nicely that I had a boyfriend and wasn't available. I started to feel very uncomfortable.

My boss made me come work late at night for a special event, which made me mad because I would have to be there after the buses stopped running. He heard all of this because he was always lingering around. He offered to walk me home that night. I refused. As it turns out a DIFFERENT man attacked me as I walked home alone that night. I wasn't hurt, though, just shaken up.

One day my boss asked me where a fancy piece of pottery that was sitting in the dishroom had come from. I told her that Thomas had brought it to me. She told me that not only did he not work there at all, but he had done time for 'hurting women' and the way he lured them was by offering to walk them home. The pottery he tried to give me turned out to be stolen from an exhibit upstairs. I had already put in my two-weeks notice at this point and I told my boss not to tell anyone where my new job was. It was in another part of the city.

Well, after I had been working at my new job for several weeks, I was there working on a day when the restaurant was closed. Someone knocked on the front door and I opened it to explain that we were closed. It was the stalker from my old job. I was shocked. He handed me an envelope and I told him to leave. He said he wouldn't leave until I took it. I took it and shut and locked the door. It occured to me that if he knew where I worked, he certainly knew where I lived. I was terrified.

Inside the envelope was a drawing of what he imagined I looked like naked. The note said that he wanted to make some jewelery that looked like that, and to do so he needed some nude pictures of me. He wanted me to call him to arrange that.

I was really scared. I don't know why I didn't call the cops. I was afraid to go home. I called him from a payphone and left him a message explaining that if he ever so much as looked at me again I would have him taken care of and he would wish that I had just called the cops.

He left me alone after that.

The point of my very long story is that I was polite to this guy that creeped me out right from the very start because I felt sorry for him and I didn't trust my instincts. Look what happened! It was terribly, terribly frightening. He was a big, strange guy.

SO...trust your instincts! It could save your life. You don't owe it to creepy men to smile at them. That's what they have porn for. It's not your job to make sure that no weirdos feel rejected or something. Protect yourself.

 

On a tangent: So what exactly (aside from the obvious drawing naked pictures and incessantly bugging you to let him walk you home) makes a guy creepy or scary?

 

also, some freaks love creeps.
i think some girls are confused and think that nice sweet guys look like creeps
and sick dirty perverts seems all nice and beautiful to them

so the real question is, just how confused are you, and how keen is your vision?
i think 99% of women think their creep radar is somewhat keen, but the truth is, 99% of them really have no idea what is good or bad

 

i'm not sure you guys understand just how often women are assaulted and don't report it. i've had to drop night classes for being stalked. this guy creeped me out bad, so i started carrying weapons. the last straw was when he tried to hit my car in the parking lot and drag me out. luckily a security gaurd was there. another time a guy followed me home, but i started honking my horn as soon as i got to my street and everyone came out to see wtf and the guy was naked in his car, and had been following me for 20 miles from my job. both looked fairly normal. but there's something wrong in some men's eyes or posture, their body language screams a warning, that something isn't right. now a lot of times a woman won't return your eye contact or friendly overtures because she's spoken for or just doesn't want to develop any new relationships. it's not an insult to the man. but too many times to count, a woman standing alone is attacked and terrorised by an angry, misogynistic man.

 

This woman I worked with at my old job use to creep me out so bad, my stomach would hurt everytime I was around her.. I would always just feel my gut instinct to stay away from her and so forth...
She was arrested at work months later for molesting her grandson...

When I get any gut feeling (not by appearances or anything or just cause someone acts a little different) but a true gut feeling, I just tend to stay away from them...

 

all those women on here who have nasty experiences - you have my deepest sympathies.
I don't know of anyone who has had anything quite that bad, but I do get what the original poster means, that creepy vibe thing,
My old flatmate called it beady eyes syndrome - she reckons you can't trust a boy with beady eyes. Judging by stories i've heard and some of the guys i've met, that seems to be true.

 

another thing
women hurt men just as bad as men hurt women

they just do it in a more subtle way

like saying you're the father when you're really not
or other stuff like that

women are very very creepy
but men are brave i guess, or stupid right?

women are equally powerful throughout
suffering and torment between genders just manifests so on the surface it usually always looks like the males fault.
when you see clearly
there is no such thing as gender inequality, and never has been
the whole gender problem is mass ignorance, not male or female.

scary men?
scary women?
scary people?
it's ignorant to think its not 50/50 and always has been since the beginning of time

 

Well, we all have about the same power. Nobody is necesarily stronger than anybody else.

 

What a scary story, KC, I am glad you got away. Three times when I was younger, I have had men show me they were masterbating in their cars. It SCARES womyn when this happens.

Levi, your story was also scary, but all too common. I know a number of womyn who have had to leave jobs, and even neighborhoods, due to fear of sexual assault, or assault itself.

MOST men are NOT like this, but there are a small, yet significant number who are.

Manko, if you had ever been raped or sexually assaulted, or even ever feared rape or assault, you would have a much different opinon. But unless most men have been victimized as children (a truely horrible thing which happens much more than it should) or been in prison or a Institutional enviroment, where THEY were the victims, many just can't understand.

Just this morning, I was taking Sage to the bus, and a dude in a truck just LOOKED at me with nothing but lust in his eyes. I was so uncomfortable that I made sure all the doors were locked when I went into the house. My first thought was "OMG, he knows where I live." As he saw me entering my home.

I've talked about this subject with my dh and other men, and none that I have talked to (save one, who was sexually abused as a child) could understand what I was talking about.

MOST men are NOT scary. But there are some who are. ALWAYS heed your instincts.