salvia breakthrough finally

why do some people think cucumbers taste better pickled?

 

for me the experience looks like something i always knew about... like some lost memory. as soon as i'm into the trance, i recognize that reality, and it's so familiar that i have no difficulty in being convinced that it is the only thing that exists.

so i don't agree that it seems like some place we haven't been yet. i feel the opposite.

 

It's some place we have no business being. I 'reconized' it on some obscure level too. I recognized it was bad and I didn't want to be there. Seriously as soon as I broke through I looked around and thought "Oh shit not this"

And the salvia entity seemed to convey to me "Hey man, this is what you wanted, you're here now... time to go for a ride"

 

ME TOO. except i use the work "looked" loosely, as i was not seeing my actual surroundings AT ALL.

and about your other question...i wonder if it has to do with smoking technique? i've done it twice before, but only taking one hit at a time, and then passing it. during those times i laughed really hard, felt the salvia gravity, but didn't ever breakthrough. this last time i took two big bong rips and instantly forgot about what i had done. i vaguely remember seeing my bong in salvia land split in half and fractal all over the place. i knew it looked familiar but i had no idea what it was. it was probably when my friend was moving the bong out of my hazard zone.
when i came too, and my friend told me how crazy that just was, i thought he was tricking me. i felt kinda mad at him for a second, cuz i was just so confused, like WTF just happened?!

i realized last night before going to bed that i have two injuries from rolling around my couch/floor/table like i was possessed. i scraped my shoulder and got a bump on the back of my head.


the "salvia people" weren't conveying to me "hey this is what you asked for" because i didn't remember smoking it. but they were kinda conveying a similar message, like "you got in line to play this game, and now you GOTTA play. when the music comes around to you, you know what to do"

oh man, i'm getting scared writing about it.

another note: i was sweating bullets when i came down. and couldn't move my legs well.

 

Hearing people express their dread of the Salvia beast makes me as jolly as Santa Claus.

 

How come?

 

Fear is real.

 

Fear is a liar. Where is salvia's bite. I'll admit that it barks.

 

probably in instances of unstable youth like that kid who killed himself shortly after doing salvia.

 

Well, you have smoked it right?
I'm aware that people believe fear to be a lie, and sometimes I can even believe it myself, but ironically, for some reason, I never can quite remember that fear is supposed to be a lie when I myself am confronted by a grand tidal wave of terror.

It seems like it's one of those hearth-side things that people say while in comfort because it sounds nice and the world would make sense and be a happy place if it were true, yet the whole notion kind of dissolves in the presence of fear itself.

 

i posted more in SB's thread - don't fight her

 

I have smoked it. Yes, it can be of a stressful intensity, however as far as I can tell it has no enduring deleterious effects, no matter how terrifying it may seem. Nor do I see these effects having an enduring purpose beyond the sensational intensity itself.

Are you happy because you have company in your experience?

 

I fought her the second time. It started weaving me into its device again (over a bus seat, like my bodily form was being used to reupholster it) but I ripped myself out of it with a burst of willpower and directly refused the entity when it tried to pace me back in. This thing was standing in front of me or beside me and actually leading me into it by taking my hand and placing me whereever it pleased. I tore from the mechine then tore from it's grip and yelled in its face that I would not let it take me again.

And I feel damn good about it. Something terrified me and used me, and I went back and affirmed my Will.

I'm still not sure if it was a genuine entity/dimention or just some incomprehencible splitting of my own conciousness. The latter is more likely from a rationial standpoint, but I can't claim to understand these things.

 

Add on.

The most confusing thing about this is how it felt so real, while being so absurd. While the mind is our only catylist for perception of the univerce around us, it is obviously capable of great deception. Mental illness and ect.

But is not the most rationial perception of the univerce not inheriantly deception? It's a noted scientificial fact that we do not directly 'see' the world around us. Senses such as sight and hearing are only a vague interpretation. Gathered by inperfect receptors and defined by an ignoriant mind. It even seems that the mere act of observing something changes it. Go youtube the double slit experiment... how the hell do you explain that?

Wow, this is pure rambeling. Ha, nevermind me.

 

Not deception, but you do make it up, conception. Everything arises from conception, everything is an idea.

 

My point is at this time, we as humans are completely oblivious to the true nature of the universe. Only in recent history with developments of science are we only beginning to try and look.

 

We have been gazing at the night time sky for a very long time. there have been discoveries made time and again only to be forgotten to be remembered once again. Libraries burn in Alexandria and our current data base is in enormous jeopardy at this very moment.

 

I'm also aware of the sentiment that fear is not real because it isn't infinite in length.

To this I'd say that neither is contentment, nor peace of mind apparently. Longevity doesn't have a say in defining what is real to me, because I don't believe reality to be that static. So the difference is, from the perspective of peace of mind, you are free to say fear is a lie or fear is real. You are free to say anything you want. But from the standpoint of being encapsulated in fear, you are much less likely to speak the former. And by "much less likely" I mean, it isn't going to happen.

Basically, it occurs, and it makes people shut the fuck up.

But you have to understand, to me, this entire discussion we are having is nothing but a sport or a game because, like I said earlier, any proprieties made about fear while not in the clutches of fear are just posterity.

It doesn't matter to me either way. I'm completely accustomed to people not agreeing with my experience.
And to be fair, nothing in this thread has confirmed that I even do have company in my experience.
Salvia is scary, everyone knows that and it's not a new revelation. It seems the interpretations of that fear are still very wide.

 

^ We are never going to see eye to eye on this but I dont think you can accurately make the blanket all statement salvia is scary. I have had scary trips on it and something about having my reality and perception so strangely transformed is always disturbing to a degree but ive had some completely ecstastic trips on it as well. What it is to me is unpredictable on how it acts on emotions, Perhaps you have not taken it enough. If that's the case maybe we will see eye to eye eventually.

 

My life occurs to me as series of sensations, some of which I may call pleasant and some not so, but am required to do neither.

There is a bandwidth of sensational awareness beyond which we cannot go and the only entertainment value is really on the level of intensity, and even then there is a ceiling to "peak" experience.

Is this why you are so amused then? Did you answer this question and I not understand you?