sad and lost

Discussion in 'Love and Sex' started by SensualCaramel, Jun 2, 2004.

  1. SensualCaramel

    SensualCaramel Member

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    my boyfriend and i have been living together for a while now. we have been very buisy with work and trying to keep up with payments. ive been thinking on how to spice up our sex life, but its been hard lately because he's always tired. i want to wake him up (if you know what i mean). is there anything i can do or any ideas? i tried sleeping in lingerie, but it's not kicking in. i hope he's not losing interest with me or him finding someone else to screw around with. thanks in advance!
     
  2. meishka

    meishka Grease Munky

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    wake him up. set the alarm for an hour or two before you both have to get up in the moring and have a go. maybe while your in the shower. or you could wake him up with a bj. then rape him in his sleep. he won't mind. lol
     
  3. AutumnAuburn

    AutumnAuburn Senior Member

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    Toys, games, role playing... There's lots of things you can do...

    Waking him up with a bj, is a good idea, guys dig that...
     
  4. SensualCaramel

    SensualCaramel Member

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    ive tried, still no luck what so ever. maybe i dont spark him anymore, who knows.
     
  5. PureInnocence

    PureInnocence Member

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    You tried waking him with a blowjob? What happened? He just said no, too sleepy? I find I have a hard time with my bf when he sleeps too. I heard men love to be woken up like that. But mine!! sheesh... sort of mumbles in his sleep and rolls over. Then in the morning feels mortified cuz he missed out on a blowjob! lol.

    But why isn't it working? What does he say?
     
  6. MikeE

    MikeE Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    On your mutual days off of work, initiate sex in the afternoon. He will be rested and appretiate that sex is a priority for you.

    Or, how about this wild idea, talk to him about what has changed.;
     
  7. glsspder12

    glsspder12 Member

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    Surprise him at lunch for a nooner. Join him in the shower in the morning or at night before bed. Or wake him up with a BJ. I don't know a guy who would turn down any of these options, I have been tired and worn out many a times but is she initiates something i never turn it down.
     
  8. SensualCaramel

    SensualCaramel Member

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    see the thing is, on our days off which is only two days, he is still too buisy. like for example he wants to go grocery shopping or having that day out with his mom and stuff like that, and always when it comes to the end of the day he says hes "too tired to do anything tonight". also its hard to wake him up with a blowjob because he either dont wake up or rolls over my hair in his sleep, ha ha. i mean im really trying and i dont know what to do. i give or should i say gave him whatever he wanted, im just so confused. if only i knew what is wrong with him.
     
  9. lk_twst

    lk_twst Member

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    ummm it definatly sounds like he has found a buddy
     
  10. PureInnocence

    PureInnocence Member

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    I think you need to talk to him, for sure. Because for him to have no sexual appitite is odd. Plain an simple. Not saying it's not impossible, but deffinatly not something that happens every day for men. Testosterone is the sex drive hormone and we all know men are just hopped up on it, hence, horny dudes always looking for a piece, (no offence intended, I may be exagerating a little ;), but not that much! :)). Now, if you're bf is suddenly not acting like a normal guy, I think it's something you should bring up to him. I'm sure there could be a few reasons why he's like this, but he's the only one who knows.
     
  11. Miss_Tambourine_Girl

    Miss_Tambourine_Girl Member

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    i have the perception he's cheating...
     
  12. TheStoon

    TheStoon Member

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    Its IS normal occurance for a man to lose his sex drive from time to time, there certainly isn't anything ODD about it, and it doesn't mean he's having an affair...

    I'd imagine it goes something like this, he was down for some reason, possibly work, and the pressure of paying bills etc - so he lost his sex drive. Now, instead of being understanding and giving him time - you have made numerous attempts to turn him on, which have not worked - no fault of yours, he's just not in the right frame of mind for it - and now he's worried even more because he feels he's letting you down or upsetting you when he rejects your advances. The reason he wants to be busy at weekends etc is because he knows he's not up for it, and he doesn't want to be in a position where he will have to reject you, because he wants to spare your feelings.... you can hardly try and seduce him when he's with his mum can you!!

    My advice, give him time, give the trying to seduce him a break for a while, and let him come round in him own time. When he is good and ready and in the right frame of mind for sex he'll let you know.

    (mini rant follows)

    I'm curious however if the advice in this thread would still be along the lines of "rape in his sleep" if this was a man complaining that he wasn't getting any because his girlfriend was not in the mood.
     
  13. Magicfunkychicken

    Magicfunkychicken Member

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    I think you need to have a good talk with him about how you're feeling and decide together what should be done about it. Maybe you could set one 'special' day a week together, where it's all just you and him. But it seems to me lack of communication is a problem here.
     
  14. meishka

    meishka Grease Munky

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    a spark you need huh? try a tazer. maybe some leather. some sexy outfits. roleplaying. pretend your a hooker and have him pick you up in the car or something.
     
  15. SensualCaramel

    SensualCaramel Member

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    role playing has been done and dressing sexy (when dont i? lol) im not fat. im a size 3 in pants and have a well defined body, i just dont understand. im up for sex whenever he wants it and i also asked him if theres anything he wants me to do or him to do to me, like his fantasy, but he said there was nothing that hes just been tired lately. maybe he has found someone new, but i havent seen anything on him like lipstick marks or hickeys or certain scents. i even looked through everything of his and havent found anything. (ex. wallet, cellphone, cellphone bill, computer, and receipts)
     

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