Hi everyone, i write here because i don't know anybody whom i can talk to and i hope this forum might help, the thing is i have been with my gf like 2 years and half, and everything is really good except for some things, my gf is really insecure about herself, she cries every time i say something strong, she is very sensitive, i tell her she needs to grow up a little because this is hard for her and for me, of course i want to support her every time with everything she do, because she is someone that really loves me and we really spend good time together, but the thing is that she is so insecure that even with more that 2 year dating we haven't even have sex yet!!!, only foregame i don't know why, but the urges are killing me, and i don't want to cheat on her or anything buy is really hard, a week ago a girl wanted to come to my place and one part of me was like omg im an idio...t rejecting this. my gf and i went a couple of times to places she could feel comfortable but she is just so afraid and sentimental that we couldn't do anything, i try to be the best guy for her but i don't know what else to do! thanks.
Has she said why she doesnt want to have sex? In any relationship you haft to have clear lines drawn, that way you can decide wether or not your in it or your out. Communication is key. If you cant talk to her about how this effects you than youre starting out all wrong. Try letting her know how you feel, even if it hurts her feelings because you haft to live with your feelings and shouldnt haft to conceal them. Hope this helps
Sorry to hear that you are having so much trolbul. Maybe see a relationship counselor. She may also try going to a therapist.
I was with a very timid girl for two and a half years myself, and she and I actually came out of the relationship still being virgins. It was a mutual decision and I actually don't regret it one bit. The reason being sex was not the focus of our relationship. It ended purely because we were not compatible in the end. From what you've described, it sounds like you two are not on the same page in your relationship. This needs to be rectified and unfortunately you need to be the more patient one if you want your relationship to work with her. Either that, or you end the relationship. You have to determine whether or not your feelings for her are based more on the emotional connection, or just the physical side of the things. If the former, then both of you must learn to communicate better. If the latter, then I'm sorry but that's now how a relationshop works. A relationship is about being with a partner who is compatible with you on multiple levels. It's about sharing each other's values, appreciating them, and nurturing the emotional bond that develops between the two of you. Sex is just a byproduct of those things. If you focus on sex now, it'll likely damage her (further). If you want to support her, then that's great. I say keep doing that. In the meantime, you can deal with your own sexual urges by masturbating. It's more than do-able. If she is comfortable getting you off during foreplay, then that actually says a lot in terms of how much she trust you, considering her insecurity issue. Her willingness to engage in such activities should be appreciated and honoured........which I'm sure you already do, so this is where I stop and hit the "Post" button. All the best, ::The AT::
2-1/2 years and you haven't talked to her?? I mean really, sit down and have a discussion about this. if you have really and truly invested 2-1/2 years into a relationship and have no clue why your partner won't be intimate with you, then you really have way more issues going on here.. I mean, you should have been having this conversation after a month let alone years. Unless you both are 14 (sorry not being a jerk), there is more going on here.
Soften your heart, help build her self-esteem and confidence, and realize that she is an individual, someone’s daughter, and not a tool for you to relieve your sexual tension. Remember, love works two ways in a relationship, not just one way.
depending on how old you are, thats weird. if your both over 18, i would say its very weird to not be having sex after 2 years (well for me, i dunno about u guys!). i have some friends who have been together for like 3 years and never had sex and recently got married. they are my girlfriends friends, and they are extremely lame. i would ask her if it has anything to do with her health or some kind of deformation. dont bring it up like that tho, be more, eh..... subtle.
