Real men DO cry

We've all heard this throughout our lives: "Boys don't cry!", or "Men don't cry!"

And, of course, the time-honored "ACT LIKE A MAN!"

Given this, a REAL man does NOT show emotions (especially to other males), nor does he EVER cry, except, perhaps, at the passing of a family member.

Ever think of how many men, later in life, suffer both mentally and emotionally, from having this long-outmoded (and insensitive) fodder drilled into their heads?

IMHO, a REAL man is NOT ashamed to show his TRUE feelings (tears included), either to himself or others.

EVERY man (and EVERY human being, for that matter) are given emotions for a reason.

Why should ANY man deny them?

Gay and bi men, certainly, face many challenges in a largely straight society; just because a gay/bi male is attracted to (emotionally and physically) other men does NOT mean he is any LESS of a man than his heterosexual brothers.

If you are comfortable with who you are, and what you are, simply BE YOURSELF, and NEVER be ashamed to show your TRUE feelings; personally, I think it is LESS masculine NOT to show emotions, than it is to show them.

Being comfortable in your masculinity has no bearing on your sexual orientation.

If you are a MAN, being gay or bi does NOT mean you have relinquished your manhood.

Rather, draw upon your inner strength and fight an often unfair world with dignity and self-assurance........

 

I have never been into this "Man Up" malarky .

Its about time it was got rid of and treated all genders with equal and real respect.

I will give an example here of what I see as unbalanced treatment and it was with a doorman of a club a Late Night Cabaret Club that we frequent .

It was a typical Saturday Night and the singer had just finished her session and the DJ ramped up the music .

It isnt unusual in there for me to attract attention from other women as there are a high number of singles go in there and me and my Mrs always refer it to as the meat market . That aside its usually a good night out .

This one particular night a petite brunette ( not my type as this gentleman prefers blondes) was eyeing me up . This was going on for some time and I wasnt taking her on . She downed a few more drinks , Dutch courage as they say . After she downed a few shots ,she came over and grabbed me by the nipples . I pushed her away and then my Mrs who was at the side of me tore into her . My wife said to her "How would you like it if a guy did that to you?" and gave her the option of leaving or us reporting it .After apologising she and her 2 friends left .

Later I had a conversation with one of the doormen and I asked him their policy on this .I was quite shocked really but not surprised as we still have plenty of inequality and prejudice within our society .I explained to him what had happened and he told me to yes you guessed it to "Man Up" Grrrr . So I said to him what would have happened if i had grabbed her by her boobs . He said i would have been jumped on by them and the police informed .

So there you have it. Because I am a guy I get different treatment to a woman. I am not allowed to feel invaded and repel unwanted attention . I am a man and have to act like a man .

Not quite the end as we know the manageress very well and she agreed with us that I should not have been treated any differently . This particular doorman was never seen again at our club.

 

Thanks for sharing this (unpleasant) experience; it speaks many volumes, to be sure, and only further proves my point about that tired old cliche (and, man, IS it TIRED) "man up".

I always believed that EVERY individual, male or female, knows that when the situation arises, you have to respond accordingly (NOT always the easiest thing to accomplish!); though I am VERY old-fashioned, and believe a man should act like a "gentleman" and a female should act like a "lady", what I am REALLY saying is "act with decorum and decency".

I was raised with this simple creed: "treat others as YOU wish to be treated".

Sadly, many "characters" you encounter throughout your life do NOT adhere to this credo.

Color, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation mean zero to me.

I follow the late Dr. King's philosophy "judge by content of character, NOT skin color"

"Man Up", "boys don't cry", etc.......man, this time-worn "Johnny Macho" garbage is LONG overdue to vanish into history.

What REALLY defines a man, or a woman?

Character, dignity, honesty, sincerity, and COURAGE.

When a man is gay (or bi) in today's "politically correct" world he indeed has his work cut out for him, to try to establish a niche for himself in society where he can be HIMSELF, and, also, be RESPECT for WHO he his.

Trust me, I have fought many, many silent battles throughout my lifetime, and, somehow, have held on.

I worked for nearly 25 years with well over 1,000 people each day, mostly men.

There were FAR too many guys that were not at all subtle about their views on gays and bisexual men; however, these same men, who thought two that men having sex together was sick and gross, they all got pretty "hot to trot" when a buddy would lend them a lesbian video.

Then, "GAY was OK"

Double standard, for sure!

I was never into nightlife; always a homebody", and, when I see what things are like nowadays for gays and bi men, I am MORE than happy to simply live my solitary lifestyle, and talk with a few trusted buddies on the phone, or, on the 'net.

Again, "Captain", your post was VERY enlightining, and shed yet another aspect of the "man up" nonsense...

 

Think about this:

If REAL MEN were not SUPPOSED to CRY, then WHY were they given tear glands?

As I have always enjoyed reading about military history, I have read some truly horrific stories about the Marines, regarding physical (and emotional) abuse.

Again, REAL MEN do NOT cry or show EMOTION.

To those Marines who had survived such ordeals, and still remained REAL men, with enough courage and backbone NOT to succumb to all of that "Johnny Macho" gung-ho garbage crammed into their skulls, you have my deepest and utmost respect for your bravery and courage.

Many say that things are much easier for gay and bisexual men today, compared to 50-60 years ago.

These days, with so much political wrangling and civil unrest, I, personally, cannot be too sure.

In closing, live your life as you ARE, not what others EXPECT you to be...."fight" silently with dignity and courage, and, when the cards are played right, enjoy YOURSELF as you DESERVE to!

 

IMHO;

The MORE a MAN is NOT afraid to SHOW emotion, or, for that matter, to CRY, is indeed a man who is SECURE in his masculinity, and shows total disregard for the "established order" which strongly intones:

"REAL MEN DON'T CRY".

Yeah, right.......

 

Agreed, 100%, my friend, all the way.

Being part Italian, when I would cry, I'd say, "that's the Italian in my coming out".


Even I know that "holding it in" can lead to some serious issues, down the road.

Me, sometimes a cartoon will even make me cry.........well, that's just me....I've always been a VERY sensitive fellow, and would even be so if I were straight......