published

gues whattie? I am a published author now - woo. Well, it's just an article in sexy old Critic (the student magazine) but hey - it was ever so exciting...me and my mate Jimmy did a survey of the toilets around campus..good times.
it's called "Crapping on Campus" and you can look at it here - it's in issue #10, on about page 27 i think. But yeah....good times.

 

hey that was cool, original... good work!

 

alright, so i look at the title of the piece...and i think, "ok there has to be some slang i'm missing.' But sure enough, there wasnt

 

Fucking awesome. I was pissing myself reading it and I've got no idea where these toilets even are.

love the pink jersey, btw.

 

ha ha ha ha ha
man i wish we had shit toilets, ours are all very very posh, you feel like a 1900's gentleman when using them, with their individually hand tiled floors and porcilen bowls and stainless steel soap dispensers as well as hat racks and bag holders, with a lovely oak finish.

ha ha haa

yeah i am loving the pink jersey too.

Doug

 

Sophie that was actually so cool, u are the ultimate Bob Saget!!

 

ahahaha...saggylicious. And go the pink jersey - from an exclusive boutique known as glassons.

 

saggylicious ?????????

yeah go awsome glassons, making girls sexy all over NZ. can't beat them

well unless your a guy and then halensteins is cool as cos its so cheap.

Doug

 

I used to write for Waikato's paper, and recently got back into it. I am glad it is all on computer now -- you have no idea how long I spent with a craft knife putting all that text into columns....

 

ahaha, yeah, well stull have it in print - the online version supports the print version which is still the most widely read.

Oh, and by the way, just because you couldn''t see it, the delightful caption they put under the photos of Jimmy and I was "Jimmy is trapped in a woman's toilet. Sophie is just busting for number twos"

hmmm.

 

LOL

busting for number twos (i don't get it) btu i will laugh anyway.

oh and whats up with not being able to see the scores on the crapometer :'(

Doug

 

i dunno....alls I can say is that it looks different in print.

and do you really not get it or are you being sarcastic (i am in essay brain meltdown at the mo, and can't tell).

I'm assuming the former then....
number twos....it's a toilet story....ringing any bells here? It's very much like that little girl on tv saying Mummy's on the toilet doing pooooooooos.

 

(and this is a big indicator that I am getting into that hysterical stage of hangoverness where anything is funny)

Poos is actually such a funny word...say it, c'mon - POOOOOOS. even a poo, singular is flippin funny, pooos, poos, pooooooooos.

i crack myself up.

 

haha, a great read! Thanks for posting it for our entertainment

 

i know what number twos are but why are you shaking the bars to bust for number twos? wouldn't you turn around and use a lovely toilet which is rigth behind you. or are you implying they are unusable for number twos

ha ha ha

and OMG that ad "mummy is doing pooooooos" is fucking hilarious.

i agree Pooooooooos is such a funny word.

Doug

 

That ad is great. I love the little psycho boy who is playing the drums...awwwww.

I also love how everyone can identify with at least one baby 'type' - I was the chatterbox muumy's doing poos kid...
apparently one time when I was about 2, my parents picked up a hitchiker, who tickeld me and says "now, what's your name, little girl?"
to which I relplied "I is sophie watson, I 2 years old, I a chatterbox and I full of beans".
That shut his patronising self up

 

dirty hitch hiker.

why was he touching you. (dirty dirty old man)



but LOL you were full of beans thats just funny


Doug

 

geez doug, you make it sound so sordid....
and as for beans...I was an odd child. I called my grandma 'gamma' and my grandad 'more gamma' (coz he was like gamma, only there was more of him).
and once when we went to sexy old churton park I saw one of those metal electricity tower thingies, obviusly thought it was the eiffel tower, and asked Mum if we were in Paris...oh dear.

 

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA.
When I was little I invented my own swearword coz I didnt think any of the existing ones were bad enuf.
Do you know what it was???



IGGY!!!!

 

iggy! gloria, wash your mouth out with soap!