Problem With My Religion. Help

The first thing that comes to my mind is that you're still VERY young! At 15, most people haven't had the life experience or maturity to even really start considering religious aspects of life (depending on one's upbringing and social environment of course). Well I can speak for myself for sure, I didn't make a single effort to seek answers in life before I was 16. You say you've been a Christian forever, but I seriously doubt that's true in any confessional sense. To believe in God is something you can certainly do quite early, in some level, but in order to be logically and spirutually convinced that the Bible is revealed by God it's absolutely necessary to have obtained a great deal of maturity, in a larger sense. What makes things complicated is that even in case one does find the Bible does have a divine message, it doesn't mean (to anyone who knows anything about Christian history) that every single passage in it is the word of God. Most of us know (hopefully) that only a very minor part of the Bible's text includes teachings that supposedly are Jesus' words. Much, much more of the contents are written, edited and compiled by theologians who came decades or centuries after Jesus and had obviously plenty more than purely revelational motives to their New Testament contributions! Then, naturally, each of the millions of churches since that time has had their interpertations on what the book actually says, what techings are most essential, what is sin, how you come to Heaven etc etc. My point is, becoming a 100% convinced Christian (in the sense of having Bible as your holy book) can't possibly be easy for anyone, since legitimation of most Christian teachings - the ones that don't have anything to do with Jesus - is an extremely complex issue, no matter how strong your realtionship to God or Christ may be. All the more so if you're still very young and haven't had time to seek the truth independently, investigate different religions and ideologies, and finally, decide what way of life is the most meaningful for both you and the world today. I can't say for sure this is true of you Woodstock Child, that you're not there yet, I only know it sounds from the way you write that you haven't yet reached a very high degree of clarity on either Christian dogma or your personal goals in life. So I guess the best advice I can give is Take it Easy, allow yourself to be young for now, breathe the air and hear the music, and whatever you do, don't frustrate yourself too much by worrying about ending up in Hell because of some parties! Because if you end up there, you'll know well before your death... Because life in this world can be hell enough for you and peole around you if you live it wrong. The essential thing is to keep searching, to find the ansers with one's own mind and not through imitation or priests, drugs or other false saviours. To search is really all you can ever do - and search is quite possible even you're living a Woodstock life occasionally!! The way I see it, truth is not absolute. It's relative - it can be found in more than one book, more than one religion. And maybe for you it doesn't have the same implications in life as for me.

 

Bigg Daddy Pig rulez our reality.

 

I like the way you ask fundamental questions.

You intuitively sense where our social fault-lines collide.

I suppose it's that poetic soul of yours, and that's what also gives you the courage not to hide, like most do, your passions.

The liberating spirit within you is what draws you to Rock-n-Roll.

To be a Star, shinning Rock-n-Roll's ecstasy to the multitudes.

Rock-n-Roll rythmically releases our repressed anal-psyches, and liberates the repressed to experience the ecstatic nature of spontaneity.

It's no coincidence that Rock-n-Roll was inspired by Blacks, because, being less anally repressed, they're rythmically more spontaneous and free flowing.

It's also no coincidence that repressed anal-retentive patriarchal religions like Christianity have always felt threatened by the "Devil's Music".

That's no fault of Jesus, but the anal patriarchs who christified him to create their fascistic personality-cult.

Though they've fought against it from the beginning, Rock-n-Roll's liberating spirit is too powerful.

Yet, they're so self-conscious of that liberating power against their repressed stiffness that they even feel the deliberate need to create Christian-Rock.

Now John Lennon knows how Jesus must have felt.

However, as long as you refuse to believe the socio-historic facts of mytho-symbolic life, and deny the psychological needs that have always caused men to fabricate their god-concepts, then a monkey will always be at the throat of your Rock-n-Roll voice.

I'm sorry, Rock-n-Roll is a circle that can't be squared.

That being said, there are millions just like you who can relate to your dilema.

You can always share your dilema with them musically and honestly through Rock-n-Roll.

The rythm however, won't be quite so free flowing and spontaneous.

But you can say that about alot of otherwise successful Rock-Stars.

 

Hey I love those Veggie Tales! lol I really do. they have the cutest/funniest shit sometimes, like the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything song. that's absolutely my favorite...

"We are the pirates who don't do anything
We just stay home, and lie around...
and if you ask us to do anything
we'll just tell you "We don't do ANYTHING!"

that's just the chorus, wait til you hear the rest!

 

Everyone tells me not to let my obsessive lust for rock 'n roll ecstasy and glamorous fantasies of life in the fast lane get the best of me, but I'm not listening.

You seem to know a lot of things... very interesting philosophies I must say.