Privacy screen issue?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by 4thtwin, Apr 15, 2022.

  1. 4thtwin

    4thtwin Members

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    How would you feel if your mate / spouse put a privacy screen on their phone?

    My wife recently upgraded her phone to one of the newer iPhones and, according to her, it came with the privacy screen already on it. Meaning, if I'm sitting beside her I can't see what she's doing on her phone. Let me say this. I could care less what she's doing on here phone. I'm not a nosey person nor do I want to see everything she's doing on her phone.

    She, on the other hand seems to think that whenever she can't see my screen or if I'm sitting in a way that it looks like I'm hiding my screen from her she sees that as suspect. We do not answer each other's phones nor do we use each others phone. Why? Because we have our own phone. We both work from home permanently due top the pandemic. My job leased out the building i was in so all those workers were deemed permanent work from home. I won't be going back into the office. My wife's job, I think has done the same. I work from our bedroom and she works from the kitchen. My back is to the bedroom door and it's probably 10 feet or more to the door. If my phone is laying up on the desk and my wife walks into the room then she tries her best to see what I'm doing or what app is open on my phone. I tried this today. I laid my phone face up on the desk and walked to the hallway. From the hallway all you can see is a black reflective screen because of the angles so you honestly can't see what's on my phone. Plus, there is a large LED light right over the desk so if you can see my phone the only thing you're going to see is the reflection of the light.

    She gets nervous when she walks into the bedroom and I'm playing on the phone or if I hit a button because she feels I'm trying to close whatever app I'm on to keep her from noticing it. In between work calls I'm either playing a Candy Crush game, surfing the web, or checking email. I may be replying to a text message from a friend or family member but when she sees the text app open she assumes I'm up to no good. I guess she thinks she should be the only person texting me. A little while ago I got a notification on my phone from a photo app I have on it with a look back memory from like 5 years ago of old photos from that day. It was a pic of my wife so when I called her into the room to look at the pic she was looking at the screen and I got a text message notification so I just swiped it to clear the screen. She immediately thought I was trying to hide something. I wasn't trying to hide anything, I just wasn't ready to look at the text because she was looking at the pic. She then makes the comment, "Oh, you got a text message" and leaves the room. A little while later she comes back into the bedroom and stand about 6 feet from me just staring. When I turn to acknowledge her she turns and walks out. When I go ask her what she wanted all she said was "nothing." I guess I was supposed to check the text right then so she could see who it was.

    My question is this. I'm due to upgrade my phone and I've been looking at a few options. If I do get a new phone And I get a privacy screen with it would that make me look suspect? Again, she's got one on her new phone. I'm tired of my wife looking at me with the side eye but I do not feel that I need to show her everything I'm doing on my phone either. Even in a marriage I feel that a husband and wife are deserving of some level of privacy, right? She doesn't show me everything she does on hers and it's always in her hand.

    Would I be wrong?
  2. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter Super Moderator

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    It sounds like a bit of a trust issue .

    I think you both need to talk and sort things out ,otherwise things will fester .
    Toecutter likes this.
  3. Daretobare

    Daretobare Member

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    My wife and I have been married 46 years. I've never gone in her purse or phone without permission and she doesn't go into my wallet or phone or tablet without my permission. Our computers were always set up with individual log ins as is both our smart TVs. In life we need to have our own lives and privacy at some point. Let it start there we figure.
    I agree with the captain. You have to talk and gain some trust or it could cause other factors in your marriage
    Captain Scarlet likes this.
  4. Percyjackson1790

    Percyjackson1790 Senior Member

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    If you both get IPhones you can share apple ID’s and there are sharing apps to prove neither of you are doing anything g wrong not saying you should go this route but may help.

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