Please Help: Can A Total Bottom Become Versatile?

Most gay men are versatile. Being a total bottom or total top makes it harder to find a guy to hook up with and very hard to find a companion. Most men like to bottom and top... there aren't many guys who are just into topping.

Plus bottoming can be a bit painful sometimes... it's not something I can see myself doing ALL THE TIME but it seems like that's what im most turned on by. I think there's some type of mental block preventing me from getting a hard enough erection to top. I've topped once but I only stayed hard for 5 minutes. I think my mind is wired like a females mind in that i get off more on getting dominated and not dominating/fucking

I just want to know why is it when I try to top I dont get or stay too hard and is there anything i can do to change this... once i got int he dudes hole it felt good but for some reason i lost my erection eventually

 

well jfunk - my experience is that there are more guys who want to bottom than top. I always describe myself and versatile since I like both bottoming and topping and being bi have always enjoyed fucking women.

I used to always think of myself as a top until in the last ten years I discoved the delights of being fucked and prostate orgasms

If you are gay rather than bi then I think it's more normal for some gay guys not to be into topping. Just go with the flow and if you prefer bottoming then so be it - if you take care to use plenty of lube it shouldn't be so painful unless your partner is real big.

Good luck,

Simon :sunny:

 

Jfunk i have found that when i think about whatever it is im doing sexually to my partner, even if its not all that pleasing to me, i think about the fact that its pleasing them, that they love what it is im doing, and because i want to make them happy, it helps to remind myself of those things. They do things to pleasure me, to get me off, I have to try and do the same, and to find pleasure in that is pretty awesome. Dont know if that helps, but i find it helps me do things that i wouldnt normally be into,but because i know it will pleasure and please the person im having sex with, i can keep my hard on and do whatever it is they want, and i get pleasure knowing that im making them happpy... good luck dude. Hope you find what makes you happy!

 

I love to bottom. The bigger the better and multiple is fine too. Spit roast , Dp, triple p I loved to be filled with dick

 

Sure, anything is possible. The issue with the gay community is that there are too many bottoms and not enough tops. I am a total bottom and it would be a struggle for me to be versatile. I just love dick inside of me.

 

Being versatile has it rewards. It gives you the flexibility to go into any situation and have a pleasurable time.

As we get older, sometimes there are ED issues that can come up. Blood pressure medication took my sex drive and turned my cock into a limp noodle...so I had my Dr. prescribe meds for that as well. Viagra, Cialis, etc. I wasn't going to declare myself a total bottom when I enjoy being versatile because I couldn't keep it up. Luckily I'm past all that now...but if you want to fuck, then do what you need to do to make that happen.

 

But don't you need to get off too?
Never been fucked, properly. Toys a little play and one pegging.
I want to try take it up the ass but that's to experiment not for the rest of my life.
I want to try stuff but I would have thought guys want to fuck as well as be fucked.
If I had multiple hookups I would fuck a guy but for now I want to try bottom and mutual oral

 

I fucked women my entire life as a top but I was always more concerned with their pleasure than my own. Orally pleasing a woman was a particular delight.

After I discovered transgender women, I knew I was a bottom before I had even tried it. I just knew that my desire to give a woman pleasure was going to take that path. With a transgender woman who is a top, I feel completely fulfilled as her bottom.

 

Do you miss topping and/or for you think you could go back to being with a cis woman? I know you don't think of yourself as gay or even bi, but do you now wonder what sex with a man is like?

 

I used to think that I would always have to top sometimes to be satisfied sexually but after being a bottom, I realized that for me, nothing compares. If my girlfriend asked me, do you want me to fuck you or you fuck me, I would pick her fucking me every single time.

I could never go back to a cis woman for those reasons. As for a man, I am just not attracted to men. I have zero interest in men - my ex wife said I was the man who loved women and she was right about that.

Give me a girl like this and as Shania says, I am in it for life.

 

That is great. You are a very lucky guy. Just hope she doesn't decide some day to remove her cock.

 

I have asked her about that and she says that will never happen. She loves her big cock and she loves to fuck and be sucked.

 

Maybe you just need the right partner/s.
I haven't hooked up with a man but I have desires that are basically bottom in your terms.
If I had regular hookups with a man I might want to fuck him. I might want to try different things.
I'm hoping to sick a dick, take it on my ass then get blown, all going well it's what I want to experience.
If we repeat I might try different things.
I think if it's mutual hookups or a relationship you need to put it out there so you both know what's on the cards.
He might take time to help you get hard so you can return the favour or experiment together

 

I finally got my guy to go to my resort,got him in via a permit for work. Owners require this.

He immediatly thought sex! We do have real work to do but we will get naked in the morning before we leave because I want to suck his cock from soft to hard and then ride out.

Work and get sweaty and then take a shower so we can have sex,this will be my first top.

He deserves my cock up in him since he has fucked me so many times.

I am so excited!!!

 

I tried top. I need some practice. Great sex anyhow!

 

I am a total bottom without doubt....And I sincerely believe that a true total bottom like me could never become versatile .... I don't feel at all masculine while I'm sexually with a man... I instinctively assume a role more akin to femininity ....I definitely don't view my little dicklett as a sex organ....In fact, the more aggressive and manly a top becomes, the more flacid I get.... I consider my mouth and my other hole to be my sex organs... I feel that it's naturallly my place to be penetrated by a man and it's exciting for me..... I have never even imagined attempting to top and I don't believe I would be physically able to do so even though I am able to get an erection under the right conditions...

 

I'm a total bottom I don't fuck my wife anymore I prefer to lick her and get a guy to fuck us both x

 

Wow....That would be what I would consider the perfect situation for me.... I don't fuck my wife anymore either....She is post menopausal and literally has zero desire for it.... I was also married once before....My feeble attempts at fucking her came to a stop about 5 years before we divorced.... In that last 5 years she had a couple of boyfriends who fucked her regularly and sometimes while I was home.... I sucked one of those guys off a few times but always daydreamed about him fucking both myself and my wife in a threesome so to speak just like you described but it never actually materialized.... I once told her of my daydreams but the only reply I got from her was: "I'll think about it"....