People making you wait as a power move

Sometimes you have to wait for people in life, but if someone is doing it as a power move it can be very offensive. Have you ever had such experiences? Below are some of my experiences of the matter... some from quite a long time ago which I didn't handle well, and some from more recently. Please share your thoughts - and more importantly - your own experiences.

My first memory that made me think of this was from a time when a colleague was taking over from a security shift from I'd just finished (it involved one guard in a cabin by a gate of a manufacturing plant). We'd said a few words to each other, and I was about to say something else about the job that he 'sort of' needed to know... just one of those things you'd say for the sake of it. He'd just brought something from his car (20 yards away) to the hut, and must have been about to go get the other bag from his car. As I started speaking he said "hang on there a minute" and went back to get the other bag. I waited and when he back as I'd started "yeah all I was saying was that...". He interrupted "yeah yeah, go on away home"! It was sort of like a double blow. I thought "why the fcuk did you even make me wait". If it were me in his position I'd have just waited a sec or two and let the person go, rather than both of us being there for another 60 seconds... as that sec or two wouldn't even really be taken from him anyway. I'm not saying it was deliberate of him. Maybe just natural lack of respect for me being young. Be it deliberate or not, after him witnessing that I'm sure he lost some respect for me. And yes, the guy was an ahole anyway.

As a bus driver (currently) it can happen too. One time these girls ran up to the bus (parked at the stop) to get to it in case it left, but their bfs only walked. They said "see those guys there, will you wait for them?". I waited because I was a minute ahead of time anyway. Guys at that age could be figuring out how to be an a**hole, and testing you to see if they've any power. They probably thought they delayed the bus. Another time I'd a crowd of people getting on the bus, and I noticed some scobes in the background. All the crowd got on and I closed the door. Then a few tourists came running up to the bus so I opened it again. Then after closing it again, only then did the scobes shout out "wait wait wait". This time I saw it coming and just drove off.

Another time I had been finishing a night shift and was hoping to get home before the sun came up so that I could get to sleep. I had a temporary access card at the time, and as I was about to drop it back into security it didn't work at the door. The security guy took it from me through the side window, went over to one of the PCs and proceeded to try and fix it. I knew I'd be ignored when I said "I'm really in a hurry" but still couldn't help but say it. No reaction! He took his time and fixed it. Only then did I realise that I didn't actually need to go in as I'd already handed it back through the side window.

One time was when I'd just clocked out (finished work), and one of the line managers was asking me a question. Then his friend came in and they proceeded to chat. After about 10 seconds I said "I'll be back in a second". He said "Liam, wait a second there". I just said "don't worry, back in a second" as I kept walking. I went and did something else and came back about 3 minutes later. yes, depending on the person that mightn't turn out very well. I couldn't have stood the thought of standing there while they were chatting.

Another time a motorcycle guy (on foot) was crossing the road. A car on the other side of the road beaconed him to go out. He walked slowly considering the situation. I beeped at him and waved at him to go faster. He looked back as if to say "I could kick the shit out of you".

Now the last example is kind of different because it was when I was waiting for an interview. It wasn't a power move on their part. It interests me because when you're going for an interview you can go into a more supplicative mode. I'd already facilitated them by meeting them on very short notice and I'd work later that afternoon and was already cutting it tight. The interview was in a hotel less than 10 minutes away from their actual business. It was very obvious that I was the only one being interviewed before or after me. One of the interviewers was there (in the booked room) when I arrived, but she was waiting on the main interviewer to come. I was asked to wait in the lobby. I was left waiting for close to 40 minutes! The lady who was already there kept coming out to the lobby every 5-10 minutes to reassure that the other lady was 'nearly' there. But I only thought of this waiting time in terms of going over my notes and how to be better prepared for the interview. I did not think in terms of how much time would I need to get to work after if they ended up being very late. In the end the fact that they looked so unorganised seemed to make me look good by comparison, and probably had something to do with why I got offered the job. I declined to take the job for other reasons about 6 weeks later! Looking back, I should've really walked out after about the 30 minute mark.

Thanks for reading.

 

What bothers me most is when I go to visit the doctor, I am always at the schedule time, but many times I am called after a lot of waiting (sometimes hours).
I consider that disrespectful to patients. If they know that they will take much longer, I don't know why they don't calculate better the schedules in which they place the patients.
Another thing that bothers me (although it is a bit off topic, but since you mentioned that you drive a bus), is when I get on the bus and the people who travel standing up don't move into the interior of the vehicle, although they are seeing that more passengers are boarding and that they are piling up at the entrance due to lack of space.

 

It is the trend in America. Lots to people think your time isn't important, and they want to charge an arm and leg for their time.