overcomming jealousy

it`s been 2 months, i still ain`t over it. then, i get very confusing signals from her.

 

stop thinking about it.
i know it is easier said than done, but the less you think about it the better
off you'll be. The mind is a terrible thing and can wonder to places you don't need to go.

the sooner you stop thinking about the ex the sooner you will be able to move on with your own life.

it's ok for you to feel the way you do but try to move yourself away from there.

you will be fine ... you will be with someone even better. now doesn't that sound exciting? it's true, you will and then you'll think "why did i let myself get so upset over that loser" ... you'll see.

in the mean time stay happy... think happy thoughts... think how you can make yourself happier. smile ... have good days... read the comics everyday... laugh again again... i'm tellin you, your ex is just not worth you getting upset over... there are plenty of fish in the sea... you will be fine.

best of luck to you... get happy and have a great day

 

yeah, theWho, when u spend 5 years with someone...
its rather hard to think there are better people there for you.
if there are, what the hell was i doing with him for the 1/6 of my life?

 

Believe me it's true...
I spent half my life with the woman i loved more than anyone ever.
and i promised her i would love her forever.
a house, two children, finacial security, plans for the future.
and yet afte more than 25 years together she fell in love with someone else.
how do you think i felt. I made do other plans for the future except with her.

Now I need to start all over, rediscover myself, start think of myself.
At my advanced age who is going to date me. who could possibly be interested in me. am i even interesting enough to attract someone.

Any questions i had in my mind of ever being with someone again, be interested in someone else, enjoy the company of another etc. were all erased one evening when I met this fine woman that has literally changed my life. She love everything about me and she is beautiful. I can't believe she loves me so. She has made me happier in the short time i have been dating her than any other woman i have ever dated.

But perhaps this too i will lose someday. But i don't care. What I have had the pleasure of experiencing with her has satisfied me for a lifetime. I want nothing from this relationship but I cherish every moment with her.

If she were to leave me i would be sad but i am a loving person and i know i can love again. Although, I hope this will last forever. But in reality nothing is forever, nothing. It is best to accept this reality, learn to deal with the worst but enjoy ever moment when it's the best. Expect nothing and accept everything. Be happy and truly enjoy life. There is so much to enjoy why let one relationship with someone get in your way. You are far better than that.

I know it is easy to say all this and perhaps a little vague trying to squeeze a lifetime on this thread but in short pursue happiness. It is not a Constitutional right, it is a Human right

I have found to seek good instead of evil... to smile instead of frowning ...
to be happy instead of sad. This alone has changed my life to handle just about anything that is thrown at me. I just refuse to get down. Sure it happens but i don't dwell on it. I handle the situation at hand resolve the issue as best i can and get back to my pursuit of happiness.

I wish you all the best and I promise if you make yourself just a little bit happier you will feel 1000% better. Continue down this path and life will be so much more fun.

Peace and love

 

Beautiful quote.

quantum0menace - Jealousy is a natural feeling we all have and go though in life. Ignoring what you really feel just prolongs the healing process, and can be damaging to the psyche. If you feel jealous then allow yourself to fully feel it.

Feeling it and acting on it are two completely different things ! The point is controlling your urges to act or react due to the jealous feelings will help you far in life. Acting on such feelings can be self – destructive or destructive in general.

Allow yourself to work through your feelings – and always remember life isn’t always going to be this way. It will change, you will change, and people will come and go. That’s life. It’s up too you too make the most of it.

 

TheWho Rocks - I like your positive attitude :cheers2:

 

thats right

yeah, thanks, TheWho Rocks, nice post... relaxing, in a way
got me thinking...

 

and how do i do that?
thats what everybody says:
allow yourself to feel... feel it..

but i am feeling it.
i am jealous... if i was a cartoon character, the smoke would be coming out of my green head

what else do you all mean?
really, i dont understand what does it mean to allow myself to feel jealousy...... or whatever, sadness etc...

 

Don't beat yourself up for feeling it, know that it's normal to feel it but take it with a grain of salt. 'Yeah, I'm jealous. I'll get over it at some point.' Just don't be consumed with it and let it keep you there.

 

Like Therese Aline said – don’t beat yourself up over it and don’t be consumed over it too. It is there and it is natural. When you feel it’s showing its ugly head allow the feelings to run for awhile… but always ALWAYS end on a positive note. That is… ‘this will pass, I will find someone who truly sees my worth – cause I deserve it! Patience… patience !! i will be happy again’ – and really believe it ! breath in deeply, breath out deeply. Repeat as much as necessary. If you feel sad, feel it – go listen to sad love songs on the radio for a few hours if you want, have a cry if you want. But always end on a positive and hopeful note…

It also helps to do things that will eat up time. Things that allow your mind to escape your overwhelming feelings for a while. If you allow the painful feelings to take hold 24/7, you can easily dive into depression. And trust me that’s not fun for anyone – including the people that have to be around you. So rent a heap of DVDs. I practically recommend Comedy, or better yet Romance Comedy – it leaves you feeling hopeful about life and love. Laughing will release feel good chemicals in your body and improves your mood and well-being. Watch comedy shows on YouTube or go to comedy clubs and allow them to make you laugh. Do something fun with your girlfriends, read a book, work on that hobby of yours or start a new hobby. These things I have mentioned work for jealously – they are also particularly useful after breakups too

The feeling of pain or jealously wont disappear straight away… but gradually with time. Promise.

Hope that helps sweetie.

 

a voodoo doll and a fuck load of cheap wine

 

ah, a voodoo doll. i knew i forgot something... )

 

That was extraordinarily helpful. Thank you

Namaste.

 

There is always the option of hooking up with one of his friends.

 

I would like to make a comment about the whole jealousy thing. My husband and i have a relationship that i think is close to perfection. Recently, we have decided to bring another woman into our relationship. Not just as a fuck buddy, but more of a friend. It's something that we both wanted and it took a while to make sure of that. But we toook our time and we waited patiently for the right person to come along. When there is complete honesty and excellent communication to make sure everyone is comfy, the end result is a beautiful thing. That goes for any relationship, not just my weird one. So good luck. Peace, Kitty

 

if my ex was seeing another girl that would be pretty hot.

 

thats a great advice. I fully agree with it cause i felt same feelings when someone ditched me whom I loved as much as no other can(as i feel), But in my case it takes longer time (1year) to look outside world , I became introvert preferred loneliness dewlling in her thought... but it changed gradually with the help of myself, I made my heart to understand that u need to change the situation.rest all what I thought and did is quted above , I still think like that,,,,
Nothing is for forever ...live in every moment. Dont blame life but accept.