Oral Sex

Discussion in 'Vegetarian' started by Loki84, Jan 5, 2005.

  1. Loki84

    Loki84 Member

    I'm sure that many of you guys are aware that Oral sex is not vegan, as it involves swallowing semen, which is an animal product, as it comes from humans, but fear not, because help is at hand. For any vegans here who have reservations over swallowing, I've managed to find a vegan alternative:

    Loki's Vegan Cum
    1 pound silken tofu
    1 teaspoon canola oil
    3 tablespoons salt
    1.) Mix tofu, canola oil and salt together in a blender or food processor until it forms a paste.
    2.) Mix in water until it forms a runny consistency
    3.) If it gets too runny, add cornflour to thicken it up again
    This recipe will make plenty, so it's perfect for bukkake or any other sexual acts which require a lot of semen. However, it will store for about 4-5 days in a fridge, and it can be frozen.
  2. superNova

    superNova Member

    now that is funny ;)
  3. minjeig

    minjeig Member

    i absolutely love it!
  4. Crayola

    Crayola =)

    lol ah u live and learn everyday... *points and laughs at vegans* cant swallow cant swallow!!

    jk jk
  5. Loki84

    Loki84 Member

    Feel free to email this recipe out to any of your friends. the kind of response i want is for people to think "Holy shit - those vegans are really really weird, that they can't eat cock snot, and because they actually made a recipe to replace it!" they'll think that vegans are sad losers with no sense of humour, who take things seriously, and then they find out that the joke's on them!
  6. Oh my God...that is some funny stuff...I'll have to send that out to folks...

  7. gertie

    gertie Senior Member

  8. kindwoman

    kindwoman Sista Golden Hair

    This gets my vote for strangest thing I've seen on this forum...:eek:
  9. TreePhiend

    TreePhiend Member

    I always just used egg replacer and water. Now I know!!
  10. gertie

    gertie Senior Member

    now how would suggest one uses this? :)
  11. kitty fabulous

    kitty fabulous smoked tofu

    *uses baster to give self a "faux pearl" necklace* :D
  12. that was pretty damn funny...but how much spare time do you have loki..that's certainly a *creative* way of procrastinating.

    (alternative recipe: Kangaroo spunk....you mix pva glue with window cleaner - it looks kinda like sperm - but it bounces )
  13. Sage-Phoenix

    Sage-Phoenix Imagine

  14. DoktorAtomik

    DoktorAtomik Closed For Business

    Oral sex is for pussies.
  15. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Lifetime Supporter

    you guys need a life...lol...how long til this is spamming the world?
  16. RainbowCat

    RainbowCat Senior Member

    ya, probably
  17. Loki84

    Loki84 Member

    the sooner the better! hehe, it only took me five minutes to come up wit ha fake vegan spunk recipe. On another forum I post on, a troll posed the age old question, so I thought that for a chnage, rather than posting up a "Spunk is Ok for vegans" as per usual, or just ignoring them, I'd say that cock snot wasn't vegan. However, most trolls have an ounce of common sense, so a fake recipe for manjuice was swiftly created to do the job.

    now it's not like i've actually tried this recipe. It might end up looking like spunk, or it might end up looking like tipp-ex. but the point is, most people will see a convincing-looking recipe for a vegan alternative to love liquid, and will jump to conclusions. oh, that, and i find it mildly amusing.
  18. Claire

    Claire Senior Member

    Hehehe :X

    You bring up an interesting point though... People do think you're barmy or humourless when you're a vegan...

    Vegan's rock:sunglasse

    Love Clairexxx
  19. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Lifetime Supporter

    um US translation:tipp-ex? I can't recall anything like this name. but I was in the UK in 89
  20. Loki84

    Loki84 Member

    Tipp-ex is liquid paper correction fluid stuff. Tipp-ex is the leading brand of the stuff around these parts.

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