Open Relationships But Married?

I say hell no.

I'm possessive, and I have no shame in that. He is MINE!

And he's the same way, I'm his.


I don't ever want to share my bond and love with anyone else, man or woman. So this party is exclusive, no invites going out to anybody.

 

With all due respect, you are so far removed from the reality that is my life & marriage. Our marriage is considered by everyone that knows us AND us to be th most perfect. We have not a twinge of guilt and 1/2 the time we are out we check out hotties together. We have both watched each other with another person...people with close ties to us and nothing in our relationship has changed but it has got 100x stronger, 100x steamier, and makes us 100x more satisfied. The 50% divorce rate in the U.S. is not on my side of the house!

 

In my marriage, among many things, two things are acknowledged. Neither of us is property to be owned by the other. It may be unfair to expect one person to meet 100% of the needs and expectations of another person 100% of the time. My marriage would have ended two years ago without this understanding. That would suck. He's my best friend, and I am the only woman he's ever trusted. Other than one of us wanting sex monthly and he other prefering nightly, it is a good fit.

Do monogamous people expect me to believe that there is never anything that disappoints them, that seems missing from their partners? There is no compromise? There is nothing they hoped for in their partner that they have given up in light of no one being perfect? Monogamists, like anyone else, have their acceptable trade-offs, and tolerance for compromise. I have mine.

 

With respects to your own opinion and lifestyle -- who cares if others think your marriage is perfect? Is it? Because I have never known a perfect marriage. Everyone has issues and problems at one point or another.
No matter what your sex life is, it's not a perfect marriage.

What matters is behind closed doors. Not what people think. Just you and her. The bottom line honesty of everything that no one else could possibly know, except from each of you.

And in my opinion, beyond sex, there isn't much marriage. Because you give each other away to others. You share your wife with other men. You give what is yours to others for them to act out their lust and desires rather than to cherish her and make her yours alone out of love and respect -- and the deepest desire one could have for another. You don't see her as a gem or truly beautiful inside and out, but rather a commodity to experience sex acts - because if you did, you would think twice before passing her around. And that has nothing to do with jealousy, but the most intimate bond and sanctity of marriage.
You can mask the truth by living off of sexual pleasures, but deep down inside, she'd rather have a man who truly wants her and her alone.
...with all due respect, and my opinion only, and not to anger you or anyone else.

The divorce rate isn't high because of infidelity alone. We'd have to be naive to believe that.

I'm leaning toward the opinion that you just found someone dumb enough to go along with the old saying "having your cake and eating it too."

 

This is what I agree with.

And to add to the second bolded section, I believe part of marriage is duty. What kind of duty would I be preforming if I succumbed to every lustful desire I had? Giving my body to another man is not honoring the one I have at home.

My fiancé and I have had this discussion, independent of this thread. It was a long time ago, we were assessing the issues another couple we know had faced. One thing he said to me was, "if I'm giving away myself to someone else, I'm giving less to you and I don't want to do that, I want you to have everything I have to give". It wasn't a selfish reason for not cheating/going outside the relationship, i.e.: I don't want to get caught, I don't want to lose the relationship. It was that he wanted to give me the most he could. It was a new perspective I had not yet considered.

 

There's no problem with having an open relationship as long as it's really what both people are happy with. It can't include one partner just giving in to the idea. It has to suit both people equally, without tarnishing the first and foremost relationship. If the two people have no relationship, then it's just a couple of people having sex with some other people.

But no, it's not for me. There's also nothing wrong with what some have called a "possessive" love. I don;t think it's possessive. Some people just want a unique bond with only one person. That's just as okay.

My question, however, is why do some men have the fantasy of wanting to actually watch their wife with someone else?
Does it make you feel like, "Oh yeah, that's mine" ? Or is it like watching porn, but with someone you know?
I just don't get that part. You wanted to marry this one women, and now you want to watch her get fucked by someone else? It's a really strange concept to me.

 

Beautifully put. Marriage or any committed relationship is a work.
I too, want the one I love to have "everything I have to give" all of me
and for him only. It's an amazing thing.

Plus what a turn on to tell your guy "this is YOUR pussy" and for him to get off on that AND it be the truth!

 

That phrase implies ownership. You are saying "You own her, so you can pass her around or not pass her around."

I personally think that possessive love is stifling or it will become so over time.

 

But it doesn't have to be. People can be into to that kind of thing. Just like they can be into the sharing. It's not ownership, it's a mutual agreement.

 

Your perception is your reality. I can't change that, I"m sorry.
I never implied that, if you had read every single thing I wrote.

 

I say this to my fiancé all the time. He loves it, he says "its mine" and other things to that effect.

Possessive love gets a really negative wrap because there are people who get violent, and abusive. But possessing someones love doesn't have to be negative. It can be a very positive feeling of reinforcement and security within a relationship. If that works for me, good for me. If it doesn't for you, thats ok too I hope you (generally speaking) find what does make you happy.

Reminds me of a song…

www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI3sSlKvA3o"]Miguel - "Pussy is Mine" (EXPLICIT VERSION) - YouTube

 

You know, it has me thinking, if it's really good pussy, a man doesn't want to share that stuff.
Maybe they are just average or less -- pussy.
It would make me worry if I were married and he wanted to share me!! I'd think something was wrong with me.

Miguel can make anything sound sexy lol.

Same with a man's dick, though. If it's good, WHY would I want some other woman to have it? I want to fuck what's mine and mine alone in a loving healthy, trusting relationship.

I think the word possessive is being thrown out as a defense to use as an excuse to sleep around. A little tit for tat game.

 

This entire post is entirely inaccurate for a lot of people. You can't determine the way another person views sex and good pussy or good dick.

 

If its good pussy why share it? A man biologically does not want to share his wifes pussy because that is his plot to grow seeds - not contaminate with other men.

 

Because it's his choice to do so if both partners see fit.

 

that was a rhetorical question

 

long words for a youth jas

 

Im not a youth

 

are you sure cause you speak like one

 

:iagree: