One of us not cumming.

Are me and my husband alone in this? We enjoy sex but sometimes when we have sex it ends with either one of us not being able to orgasm. Either he'll cum and try to keep going but starts to lose his erection and it doesnt get the job finished, or I'll orgasm then carry on to give him his but start getting sore and have to give up. We do sometimes have sex where we both cum and sometimes we cum at the same time which is great, but these sessions of one of us not cumming are frustrating. We do have sometimes when we try for a quicky before the school run or work and neither of us cum but we just try again when we go to bed at night.

 

Personally, I like foreplay to last until she cums from my tongue. (I like to use my tongue again after I've cum in her because she likes it.) On the rare occasions when I did not cum from intercourse, she finished me off in her mouth. Sometimes I would hold off cumming, pull out just so he could finish me orally.

 

Sometimes it's hard to accept a gift without feeling guilty.

I enjoy those times when my wife cums, but I don't. She enjoys those times when things are reversed. They may not be the best encounters, but they are happy encounters (better than no encounter, much better).

Change your view of what sex should be for.
I know, its awfully easy to say, less easy to do.

Try this, interspersed with your typical "lets have sex and both orgasm" sessions, add some "I make you cum as quickly as possible and we stop" and "you make me cum as quickly as possible and we stop" sessions. (Predetermine whose orgasm is the goal for that session.) These aren't versions of orgasm denial, but versions of proving one's skills. These are sessions where one orgasm indicates success for both partners.

As the two of you increase your abilities to enjoy a non-reciprocated orgasm, decrease the worry about meeting the expectation of dual orgasm sessions.

 

I like to give the lady several orgasms orally in combination with her favorite vibrator, and licking her tushy-bud. Then after she's nice and warmed up, some slow 69-ing and then glide right into her nice & wet.

I like to give her several orgasms first. The lady cums first !!

 

I would say that it’s much more likely that the woman gets denied especially when younger. I got a penile implant in late July and I can stay hard as long as we want. A common temporary side effect is not being able to cum. Fortunately I’ve only experienced this 4 times. On the other hand if I cum before her, I just wait a minute or so for me to desensitize and start pumping again and my wife loves that. Being able to stay hard as long as you want is a great benefit of the implant.

 

Thanks Angela, I can tell you that if I came first with you, I would take my minute and then pump you till you cum. Then slide down and lick you clean until you cum several times and are clean and begging me to stop!

 

There are times the human body defies the brain and refuses to accept signals triggering an orgasm. The body could be tired, stressed or anxious, or just not ready for orgasm. It's happened to me before. I have had to stop and sit back during intercourse in order to reset my body. That includes going completely flaccid for a short period before regaining the erection. Reentry feels so much better and shortly I blast off. If ether of us are trying to orgasm we can be trying to hard. Forcing our body to orgasm actually inhibits the response to the stimuli. Once you realize orgasm isn't happening soon step back and take a break. Cuddle up, fondle and nuzzle with your partner, and allow your body to reset.

 

It all depends on the mental and physical status of both. If you are too tired then one or both may not cum.Also if you indulge in prolonged foreplay then the male parner may fail to cum. Any mental distraction, stress and anxiety can prevent cumming.

 

I rarely cum during intercourse. My husband almost aleays gives me an orgasm through massaging my clit. And then we move on to BJ/ intercourse. In the event that this is a 2nd round that day he may not cum during intercourse right away and we will move to BJ which we know will always get him.

When we use condoms (we dont use BC) this occasionally happens after we play around without a condom (just feels too good) and then we put the condom on he just cant get there again. We usually laugh that he got too much off the good stuff and i will just finish him with a BJ or in my boobs with lube. It rarely happens but that's our solution. I would never just call it quits witbout him cumming.

There have also been times weve had awesome sex and i dont cum. Sometimes thats fine because driving my hubby wild and pleasing him makes me feel awesome. But other times i go to the bathroom and i am bulging and pulsating and i know i just need a release. I have felt confident to say "i know you are good but if you can rub me for a few minutes, I need a little more" this has aways led to really hot moments. Often leads to a 2nd round because he thinks its so hot to just focus on satisfying my needs.

 

Not all women can climax without clit massage. My wife is same, yet we both enjoy great sex and always climax at the same time.

 

My wife hasn’t been able to have an orgasm from intercourses since her last pregnancy over 20 years ago. But I always make sure that she gets hers before I get mine. She loves getting oral almost as much as I love giving it. After she orgasms, she hops on and goes on a bucking bronco ride!

 

Every man should be like you - take care of her pleasure before you climax.

 

Lots in your posting, but I'll just say that only 15 percent of women regularly reach orgasm through vaginal penetrative intercourse without additional direct clitoral stimulation. You're firmly in the majority. Your husband almost always ejaculates during coitus? Again, the rule, not the exception. If men couldn't regularly orgasm that way, there wouldn't be 7+ billion of us on this planet, and the species would have died out long ago. His orgasm during coitus is an evolutionary and biological imperative. Sadly, yours is not.

Regarding needing more, and the second round being all about satisfying you, it's a form of play that many couples enjoy. Try it as your first round - tell him you need more, and demand that he satisfy you - you'll both enjoy it, I'm sure. Make a game of it. Deny him his orgasm, until after you are well and fully satisfied.

 

Have you thought about adding role play? Pretend you’re out of town for work and met a guy at the bar in the hotel and you decide to fuck each other silly, or that guy joins you and a hot coworker for your first 3sum. Maybe your hubby is watching you fuck a guy you brought home from the gym. Let my mind wander and enjoy being in fantasyland.

having said all that, don’t put to much pressure on cumming. Just enjoy a good fuck.