Okay Women or Maybe Men... This is serious for me... please help.

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by Nisha, Jan 3, 2005.

  1. OSF

    OSF Señor ******

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    Well, Nisha, of course you didn’t. You can not be faulted for doing what you did after the fact. Many a philosopher would say that, given your situation, a reasonable decision (on what to do or how to act) could not be made.

    I can not pretend to understand what it would be like in your situation. I will never know how hard it is to act in the best manner in this situation. All I can offer you is my own personal opinion on how I think you ought to act in this situation. I do not see (outside of the natural and understandable fear) how hiding what might have happened is a good thing. You may have to go through hell and back to get where you need to be, but you ought do so.
     
  2. Love_N_it

    Love_N_it Banned

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    I'm too realistic, maybe.

    But my idea, however demented and twisted it may bee deemed by others, is a damn good way for to go to sleep at night without having to worry about this happening to her again.
    My advice for her to 'lure' him into thinking she was a normal child who could be in the same room with her father without appearing to be sick to the stomach, has to be borderline sadistic to most people.
    but if it's really happening then I would think it best for her to discover and acknowledge what's actually taking place, tonight if possible, and be prepared to take the necessary steps to ensure that it won't happen again.

    Nisha, would you like to see your father dead?
    or at least make your nightmare disappear?


    and Nisha I'm sorry if I'm causing you more problems than helping you, but I don't regret not just giving my condolences and moving on like it didn't matter, I completely understand the pain involved with not knowing if what's happening to you is a dream or not.
    naturally we have different ideas on the best methods of 'dealing with it',
    I hope things get better soon,
    my heart goes out to you.


    Fuck You OSF !
     
  3. OSF

    OSF Señor ******

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    I stand corrected.


    T H A T was the biggest load of horse shit I have ever read.
     
  4. interval_illusion

    interval_illusion Deceased

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    STOP! you are both right.... you both have your ideas and they both MAKE SENSE...

    the only thing wrong with lovin's idea is that... well, nisha COULD get in trouble or hurt or even killed for that...and she DIDNT DO ANYTHING. she doesnt deserve that.

    but i do think that you, nisha... need to go to a police station- clinic or something. dont tell them your going. say you're going to a friend's house. dont accuse him, just tell the truth. the truth cant hurt... well, USUALLY it cant.
     
  5. Love_N_it

    Love_N_it Banned

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    :D that's ugly,

    maybe a swift jab in the ass would make him holler too . :p
     
  6. interval_illusion

    interval_illusion Deceased

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    but you gotta understand... as much as that would be good... if she did that.. you dont know how he could react. she could really get hurt.

    that's why in some cases... pepper spray isnt good, etc.
     
  7. mariecstasy

    mariecstasy Enchanted

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    did you think about calling your mama.....or what about locking the door and putting stuff in the way in the mean time until you leave....
    please go to the police though....you gotta stop it from happening to you or someone else again....
    and much strength to you dear!
     
  8. FallenFairy

    FallenFairy Senior Member

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    I know what your going through right now. I had went through it when i was 11. I was sleeping but I was aware of my surroundings and well my step father had anally raped me. I am unsure of how i can put this......... If you think oyu were raped tell an adult you can trust and is behind you no matter what happens for instance a family memeber or your guidance counsler. Then go to the doctors and tell them what you think might of happend and ask if there is any possible way to tell if you were penetrated.I know for a fact that they can test or whatever for any sperm inside of you but if the guy was smart he would have used a condom. Also go see a psychiatrist for 2 or 3 sessions see if they can help you figure out what is going on. As I read further on in this thread I had read that it is your father whom is raping you is this correct??? If so Please Please PLEASE make notes of any violent acts he does during the day and have someone in the house hold (mother or sibling) initial it so that you can show your counsler, lawyer, guardian enlitem, and who ever else these violent acts and that you have "witnesses". Or if you have no one to sign make notes any way date them and put the time next to them. If at night you feel so unsafe go to a friends house or a neighbors house. The number one thing for you to do right now is to tell an adult and an authority figure what is going on. After you have told the authority and you have all the right proof ( doctors have proven you were penetrated, the notes of violent/ strange acts) and you want to press charges child services may be called you will be appointed a guardiam enlighteum (a child's lawyer) you will be asked alot of questions and you must answer them honestly that way they can help you. A date will be set for a trial and during that time the judge may put a restraining order on your father if you dont feel safe around him. Dont let any one make you do or say something that you do not want to do or say. I cant stress it enough but let someone know what is happening in your house hold and voice out that you fell unsafe and violated. PLEASE PLEASE tell someone that will help you. I hope you figure everything out I really do. If you need to talk to anyone or need advice on what to do just pm me I am on most of the day.

    *HUGS*
    ~Fallen Fairy~
     
  9. velvet

    velvet Banned

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    Just skimmed through this pretty long thread and I'm soooo hoping everything is OK with you, Nisha..

    Secondly I'd like to say that if you get pregnant, you wouldn't have all the obvious signals (bigger breasts, lots of peeing, morning sickness etc) in the first few weeks I think. Sometimes after sex I 'feel' like I'm pregnant too but I think that's just psychological.. usually a pregnancy tests (that is ofcourse negative) makes all the symptoms go away. I'm not saying that you're making things up, not at all, just that you sound like you're panicing (not like running around screaming, but you know, that surpressed kind of panic that wears you out emotionally).

    It sounds like your dad is doing way more to hurt you than to make you feel good.. so please take actions to avoid being with him (and I'm not suggesting killing). I was thinking.. if you want to know if someone was in your room while you are sleeping, make some sort of boobytrap, like a small string that will rip when your door is opened.. that way, in the morning, you can see if someone entered.

    About the sex dream and the feeling.. if I have a sex dream that is very vivid I sometimes feel this burning feeling in my vagina when I wake up.. think it's some sort of 'wet dream' effect.. but the fact that you immediatelly think your father did it is enough reason to stay well away from him.. seriously.

    Take care sis.. we're all here for you! *cuddle* Love ya.
     
  10. Nisha

    Nisha Forlorn.

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    double post
     
  11. Nisha

    Nisha Forlorn.

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    thanks alot girls.

    no... this holiday has been very bad. i have suspected him reading my journal too. i sort of did what you suggested, velvet. but with my diary, at first. i put it a certain way and i found it in the opposite way. he denies it.. but i know how i positiioned it.

    he has been acting very strange lately.. as if he has done it. he interrogates me and bullies me about my thoughts. he always asks if im angry at him for anything,or if im feeling alright. i todl him if i am, i shall tell him... he has been buying me whatever i want aswell. i dont know if he is trying to make up for what he did, if he did it. but.. he is just very cautious. when i rested yesterday... feeling sick and really nauseous he was very interesteed in knowing exactly how i was. he called me "baby" that made me want to punch him. im thinknig about this too much. i know its enough to make me go crazy.

    and velvet- i sleep on a matress in the living room. it has no doors.

    im gonig to give the underwear i was wearing to the police and get it tested to see if the white stuff is sperm or my discharge. im also going to get a pregnacy test and see if im pregnant.

    fallenfairy- im gonig to take your advice too. but see- currently im visting my father in the usa. im going back to my real home with my mother on saturday- so there i'll be able to get everything done.

    i'll keep you guys updated.. thank you so much for your help girls... you really dont know how much it means.

    edit** when im home, i'll be able to get everything tested. because here, i have no friends or anything and my dad keeps a close watch on me at all times. he escorts me to wherever i go and everything- no privacy.
     
  12. velvet

    velvet Banned

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    Ohw.. .good luck with everything!

    *cuddle*
     
  13. FallenFairy

    FallenFairy Senior Member

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    well hun I strongly strongly suggest that you tell an authority figure in the USA. If he follows you every where one day just go for a random walk and walk to the nearest place with a pay phone and call the police station and ask them where they are located and then take a cab there if you have no money ask one of the neighbors tell them your situation and then ask them for their help I know they will be more than willing to help you. You need to take car of this shit while your stil in the USA cuz if you go back home and tell the authorities there they cant do alot cuz he might not have a record or whatever but if you make atleast a complaint to the police or make a report they will have it on file and it will help your case out tremedously. Beleive me I had to learn it out the hard way. GOOD luck with everything and keep me informed.

    ~Fallen Fairy~
     
  14. Nisha

    Nisha Forlorn.

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    thanks.. but my dad is a canadian citizen- wouldnt that still be okay for the cops?(in canada)

    im not pregnant.. i got a test done... but something is definetly not going well down there... because im having this really bad ass cramps and i feel like pains down there all the time. there was a bit of blood, like half an hour ago. but it wasnt in my underwear, it was like, off the toilet paper thing...

    i m going to get the underwear tested for sperm.. i put it in a ziplock bag.. im going there soon...

    see you later.. an dthanks for your help.
     
  15. peacefuljeffrey

    peacefuljeffrey Senior Member

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    What, you think that if the father IS doing this, that the piece of shit should LIVE?

    What better way to take back the power from your rapist than to kill the fucker?!

    -Jeffrey
     
  16. OSF

    OSF Señor ******

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    Yes. I do.

    Perhaps a more peaceful way, Jeffrey.
     
  17. OSF

    OSF Señor ******

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    You know what jeffrey? I can't think of a single ethical system by which your suggestion would be justified.

    Even Mill and Bentham are rolling over in their graves.
     
  18. Nisha

    Nisha Forlorn.

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    guys, take out your little fit somehwere else.. no affense, but this thread is not really created for that..
     
  19. OSF

    OSF Señor ******

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    Pardon my saying Nisha, but our "little fit" is on topic.
     
  20. know1nozme

    know1nozme High Plains Drifter

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    Nisha,
    Are you back in Canada?? Any news? Or have you dropped the idea of taking action completely...

    It's been my experience (and I know quite a few people who have suffered various forms of abuse by family members over the years) that the longer you let these things sit, the less likely you are to do anything about them. It's hard (and more than a little scarey) to bring a family member (or even a friend, for that matter) to task over tabboo offenses. No one want's to talk about them or even admit they exist and it's likely that other members of the family will look at the exposure as a sort of betrayal.

    I feel so bad for the situation you are in... I hate it for you. But you really ought to take SOME form of action (though I suspect that if your father has really read your diary, he'll be more careful... if there are no repercussions, though - he may see your obvious knowledge of the situation and your inaction over it as some kind of obscene green light to keep doing it (it's my guess that this is a high probability). Also, if he does it to you, what other young female relatives does ha have access too? Perhaps you ought to call some of them (if there are any) - there is strength in numbers.
     

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