No anal a deal breaker now a days?

Anal sex has become so common now, that I've heard women say that it's expected for them to do anal, and if they don't it's often time a deal breaker for a monogamous relationship.

Ladies, is this true?

 

From personal experience - i couldn't say

From snippets of what my 22 yr old daughter has suggested - yes, anal sex is expected when dating amongst her peer group. (affluent, educated, 20 something clubbers)

 

Is it a deal breaker to date? No. The lack of anal sex with my girlfriend is keeping me from proposing to her though. She had already told me it's not something she would ask to do, but we tried it and she doesn't like it. She knows that I love it, and the lack of it is causing me to fantasize about it more daily. We'll see how this ends.

 

I think you're manifesting how it'll end.
And I'm guessing it's not going to be by developing self-control to be with the one you care about.

 

There is no shortage of guys out there that would date and marry a woman that does not do anal! The guys that would demand it as part of deal can just keep masturbating to porn at home, because most women do not have problems finding men that want to be with them.

 

The problem is with the internet and instant access, young people have adopted a warped view of sexuality and what constitutes a good sexual relationship.
Failing to recognize that porn is ENTERTAINMENT and not "real" sex has done a lot to give an entire generation skewed appreciations and expectations when it comes to sex.

In my 50+ years of life I have noticed rather consistently that those guys who act all macho, insist on things sexually and approach sex like a porno are generally lacking when it comes to the brains department, have an immature disdain for women (at least around "the boys") and are emotionally perpetual teenagers.

 

+100

 

Yeah when I'm trying desperately hard to chat someone up,trying not to come across all creepy,I usually slip "by the way,do you do anal?" into my witty repartee.

 

oooh yuck....who wants to go out with some anal loving skank when i could have a good girl

i say its a dealbreaker the other way...if you let my buddy bob plunge your poop chute then i'm taking a pass

 

Self-control? Lacking intelligence? You people are indeed hilarious. What ever happened to fulfillment of desire? Ensuring that your significant other doesn't go wanting or fantasying about something that you're not doing for them or doing with them. Why should I (or anyone else for that matter) have to settle for someone who I know without a doubt is not going to fulfill my desire(s)? You're right about one thing, she has every right as I do to simply move on with her life. Your opinion is just that, your opinion and it will not be forced upon me (or anyone else) simply because your view on sex revolves strictly around vaginal sex and/or oral sex. To my knowledge, oral sex isn't "normal" sex yet people so willingly endorse it. Anal sex seems to get so much opposition though? Give me break, let people enjoy what makes them happy and live your lives for yourselves.

 

I for one would be very hesitant to get serious with a girl who does not do anal, and refuses to give it a go. I do love anal, but porn is not the reason at all. It's the fact that I've been with real women who actually enjoyed anal, and even preferred it to vaginal in some cases. According to my current girlfriend, it can be incredibly relaxing when done correctly, and she even initiates anal sex herself all the time.

And I believe that as long as you know what you're doing, every woman has the capacity to learn to enjoy anal. If she just refuses to even try, then for me that would signal a certain closed-mindedness that would annoy me, and probably manifest itself in other ways down the road. And I'm not looking for someone with a number of sexual hangups, as it would be a downgrade from my previous partners. Sorry.

From what I've seen and heard personally, I'd believe that these days it's becoming the norm for the guys to expect anal sex, and the girls to expect being asked to do it. Surprisingly though for myself, there also seems to be a certain minority of (young) guys who see it as something filthy, gross, or bad in some other way. So the girls who don't want to be pestered about anal, better find one of those super-conservative guys; just don't be surprised when they turn out to be boring and unimaginative lovers in the first place.

 

I think it's a good thing to talk openly about sex and choose a partner who's compatible.

If anal is important for one of them, why deny it and pretend that desire isn't there? I don't think people who settle for less than what they want sexually are doing anyone a favor.

For some people, sex isn't important, but for some, it is.

It's a mistake to try to impose only one view of what a relationship should be on everybody.

Just be aware people change. Even if he/she likes something now, it isn't a guarantee he/she will enjoy it forever. Talk about what if scenarios early in the relationship.

 

For me it would never be a consideration, if somebody does or doesn't like Anal then it shouldn't influence a relationship. Should love people for who they are not what they do.

Anal is a fantasy and something I like, but real life is better.

 

If you insisted anal with me I would offer to shove what ever you like up your ass. Anal does not have to mean you get to stick yours in someone else's ass. You want it, take it up like a man. Butt plug and vibrator combo anyone? Yup, I would do anal with anyone as long as he is the one taking it up the shoot.

I hope you do move on and let her be since she's just not into it and you are stuck on it. You do have a shitty (pun intended) base on good relationships values. IMO it's not natural, it's porn crap and now that everyone thinks they want it relationships now have a new challenge, used to be about wanting kids or not and money and owning a house,,, now it's about ass action,,, wow,,,

 

I'll take a nice pussy any day. My wife is not into it, and neither am I. She basically told me what Sallysmart said. When I was willing to take it up the ass she might try it. Only after me.

Only done it in a threesome, a couple of times. The lady wanted dp, thought she was giving me something special. Said she had never allowed anyone but her husband in the backdoor. Never thought it was that great.

 

I would like to see after a lot of these young women have done this a few good years how many have problems holding back from having a sudden shit when shopping, hahaha,,,, bet them muscles get confused after a while,,,

 

Personal question, but it honestly doesn't matter. Is oral sex considered "normal" by you? My view on what I want within my relationship is exactly what it should be. I'm not here to cater to you or anyone else, nor will I sacrifice my happiness because you or anyone else thinks it's "not natural." I could easily list several things that are practiced within relationships, yet I'm not because what you enjoy is your business. Who am I to judge you and what you enjoy? As far as wanting kids, owning a house, etc. all of that (except having my own house) comes after I've found someone who I want to spend my life with, someone that will without the shadow of a doubt fulfill my desires. Until then, I won't settle for less.

 

Bb .

 

I have a feeling a lot of boys in this thread will have trouble finding a girlfriend and I hope they do have trouble because ergh, girls could do so much better than this.

 

That's quite the condescending tone the OP has. So your potential love of your life should provide you with anal sex because it will keep you from wondering or wandering for it? You sound like quite a catch...