Newbie with no gay friends, just the g/f and confused

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Lil__Missy, Sep 18, 2013.

  1. Lil__Missy

    Lil__Missy Guest

    So I don't even know where to start...

    In my first female relationship, 7 months now.

    Love her dearly.

    There's so many questions I have, things I wonder if they're her own personal qwerks or if it's gay norm (mean no offense in that, as I'm experiencing gay & straight relationships are VERY different).

    She is a 30yo gold star. Who has never really had ANY penetration, says she's more of a giver. I want to make her feel the way I do, but she's very uncomfortable with penetration, should I just let it go?

    Other big problem not sure how to handle, I'm comfortable being out, she's not. She's stud like and built! Crossfitter. She's experienced hate & harassment in college & doesn't want to expose me to that or endanger me for how she looks. Comments, concerns or shared experiences?

    Thanks for any help!
  2. nectar

    nectar Member

    I would say definitely let the penetration thing drop. Never been with a stone butch myself, but from what I understand, they don't really like to be penetrated, and she will absolutely feel as much pleasure as you do just by giving and hearing you happy.
  3. Beca012

    Beca012 Member

    Some girls are just not into being a bottom and that's just how they are so I would not push it.

    I'm still in that phase myself when I'm not all that comfortable in my own skin because I'm afraid I will get so much hate but it all boils down to me not being around people like myself. So I would definitely suggest just surrounding yourself with people who are comfortable with being out whether if it's at a dinner party with close friends or at a gay club.. I know this would encourage me to be more truthful to myself and eventually being able to embrace my gayness completely!
  4. Gaypride13

    Gaypride13 Guest

    I do agree with letting the penetration thing go when it comes to your gf. I am sorry to hear that your gf has experience that. You say she is stud like, so I am thinking when people look at her, can tell she is gay. If she is worried about being out in public with you, is she willing to change what she is wearing? I am not saying you have to change her in anyway. People are cruel no matter where you live. Another thing is does it matter to you to be with someone who is out or not? Also does it matter to you to be with someone who wants penetration? Are you ok with her being a top and you being a bottom. I am mean no offense.

    I know for myself I want someone who is out of the closet, because I like public affection. I also want someone who likes both, giving and receiving.

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