New Seven Word Story

bringing in new laws which were outrageously

 

excessive, including beheadings if you are caught

 

fapping to storys about fairy pygmie rinos.

 

One particular pygmy, guilty of said offence,

 

saved everyone time and beheaded himself with

 

a butter knife which took so long that....

 

he rented the space for a month

 

so he could buy a better knife

 

in the shop nearby... it took him

 

around fifteen minutes to saw through the

 

neckbone, which is always thickest in pygmies

 

But then the pygmy police showed up

 

before he'd sawn through the final millimetre

 

a tiny air bubble came out his

 

pygmy posterior, making the fuzz recoil

 

and puke from the smell coming from

 

their crack pipes, which they used for

 

smoking that crack rock they bought from

 

Shakes the self proclaimed crack king he

 

met at the roller derby last Friday