new father...advice?

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by theevilgenius, Aug 8, 2013.

  1. Hey all, I'm a 24 year old disciplined, hand working environmental science student/nyc union laborer.. who will work like a bull and will do have done WHATEVER it takes to provide for his family unlike most people around my age in this city..it wasn't planned but now I'm excited I just don't regret certain. i raised myself from 16 years old washing myself in gas station bathrooms before school bcuz I wanted an education that bad...now I rose from that but I'm just looking for some advice to raise a well rounded, respectful, decent woman any tips will be greatly appreciated no obvious stuff..plz I just want to regret anything thanks
     
  2. We all met those 'good girls' at bars frat parties etc... I know there's no such thing as the 'perfect father' but I wanna have a 50/50 respect/fear ratio with her I'm a wrong believer in tough love my pops was a drill sergeant growing up so I had alto of responsibility and discipline at a young age.. that's what me strong.. any regrets or mistakes or secrets would be greatly appreciated I afraid I'll mess this up plz be honest I don't judge anyone I've been through he'll and back just want the best for her... please I'm freaking out
     
  3. *strong believer not wrong believer
     
  4. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Staff Member Super Moderator

    Is the baby born, or is your partner expecting?
    Are you in the home?

    My son is 21, and I've had a lot of time to think about how I would have done it better.

    More boundaries. Not seriously strict but a definite no freaking way zone.
    More playtime in parks.
    Less worrying about TV at his dad's house.

    More involving him in cooking. And cleaning. He's got some issues with laundry.
    More spur of the moment trips, less stressful packing.

    More financial education. I'd buy him stock at every holiday and birthday.
    Less worrying about how I don't own stocks. :)

    More pressing on schoolwork, but I'd keep my mental health day policy (two per semester)

    I might have encouraged a few more group activities. As an only child, he could have used a pack of his own in which to make a space for himself.
    Music lessons!

    Creating this amazing space of being his best advisor.

    A more clear presentation of my own values in action.
    More anti war protests! But also more concerts in the park (that I didn't work).
     
  5. legalizedrugs

    legalizedrugs Members

    A baby does not need "tough love".

    A child needs unconditional love.

    You want your partner to 50% fear you? or was the your child? What do you want them to fear about you?

    Discipline is fine in moderation, but things can be taken too far.

    Of course your parner deserves just as much input into how to child should be raised as you do.
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. Joker8six

    Joker8six Members

    "Hey all, I'm a 24 year old disciplined, hand working environmental science student/nyc union laborer.. who will work like"

    If your such a Die hard survivalist, in your short lil life, why hell are u asking for advice now? havnt u learned anything in the street? or are u just painting a picture for us of how u think your life went because ur mom or dad or aunt or social worker or who ever didnt get u what u wanted for xmas ??? please please, just be quiet and leave the parenting up to your lady before u accidently sit on your child wile attempting to watch sports on tv. i think you are retarded.
     
  7. dopestats

    dopestats Guest

    Is it me or did anyone else find this extremely insensitive? Having street smarts has nothing to do with raising a newborn baby. Survivalist or not, we all need help or advice sometimes.
     
  8. Aerianne

    Aerianne Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

    I found a flame in it.
     
  9. thedope

    thedope glad attention Lifetime Supporter

    Enough to warm the heart
     

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