Need Advice

So some of you who read this will be familiar with my recent history, divorce & all. Well it's been almost 6 months since the whole to do with my ex declarin' her intentions I've been livin' on this here farm for about a month now & I met a gal I think I wanna get to know. Been almost 10 years since I dated & I don't really know how best to go about kickin' it off.

She's a real beaut, made me laugh the moment I first met her. She lives off farm works when called in. Also she's technically married but he's stayin' up in NYC & they're basically separated. I made the mistake of gettin' involved with my ex too quick without really gettin' to know her & we all know how that ended up.

Been 2 weeks now since she was last here to work & I've been thinkin' bout her almost nightly. Reckon the question is should I pursue or leave well enough alone & if I should pursue what's the best way to go about it? Any advice is appreciated.

 

it doesn't hurt to pursue, just don't jump into marriage too fast as apparently happened last time.

how to go about it? fuck if i know, i've never really figured that part out.

 

sounds legit

 

Anybody else got any advice? Could really use it

 

Did they file for divorce?

Dating someone whose married is risky, imo. Just be really careful.

 

Not as yet. So far I've just been working on building a friendship with her, with her man troubles & what not I didn't want to try & saddle up too fast. Figured the best approach was just to get to know her give her a chance to know me & see that I'm willin' to just be her friend, give her someone to talk to have a few beers with that sorta thing. At this point if & when I do ask her out it'll be awhile.

 

I think you are right about the best approach being to build a friendship with her first. Take your time and really get to know her, and in the mean time you can decide if you still like her, and she can actually get divorced. It will make things much more clean and simple.

 

Stick to getting to know her as a friend until her marital situation is resolved. Listen to her concerns, but try not to get too involved in any potential drama with her "ex". If she is being not completely honest, and is in fact staying married, at least you have made a friend. If she is being honest, and will be divorced soon, you can pursue more romantic interests with her. Either way, at least you didn't rush into anything too soon after your divorce. Granted, it can be hard to avoid a good looking woman when you're single, but it's better than getting caught in the middle of someone else's drama when you are just getting your life put back together. A good woman (or man) is worth waiting for.

Good luck.

 

I don't know. They're "basically separated", but didn't file for divorce.
I would be wary, and to be completely honest - wouldn't put much hope in it.

Sure, you can build a friendship, but you might develop feelings and she might stay married.

I guess...be careful and take it easy.

I, of course, don't know what her situation is, but if I were you I'd want to know if this divorce is actually going to happen.

 

Or he could just cut to the chase and send her dick pics

 

and "u up?"

 

Might be a good idea to get me to proof read, proof view, them first

 

Hey man, you got it figured out then. That right there is the best advice and YOU provided it. Are you afraid someone else will swoop in if you wait too long, is that the concern? Is there another man on the ranch that might be interested in her too?

 

I prefer 'show me them titties' , myself.

But ya gotta make sure you say 'them titties', so it's clear to both parties this is not a classy conversation and you are no gentleman.

Can't be all 'Show me a still of thy bosom, madam' because if you really talked like that you wouldn't be asking to see them to begin with, ya filthy cad. Jesus, Beat, do I need to explain everything?

 

^you are quite the charmer

 

I'd never get involved with someone who is married, separated or not. You can still work on friendship though and then, once she's divorced, you can start putting the moves on her.

 

Haha well... Obviously I'm kidding.

But aside from a laugh I guess my point is he ought to take it easy in terms of forming an actual romantic attachment this soon out of a marriage.

(But Beat, between you and me, you'd be amazed how many will actually do it! They'll say 'omg! I nvr do this lol' but they're lying. They definitely do this.)

 

I think it's too soon...

Plus you know why you are divorced, just hang fire and get a few friends...

 

I been waiting all morning for someone to say that!!!

 

@McFuddy thanks for the good laugh this this mornin'. I'm a bit too gentlemanly to be sendin' dick pics or demanding she show me them titties but still a good laugh. From the other responses it sounds like playin' my cards close to my chest is the best option.

The whole she may not get divorced at all thing definitely was on my mind & played a strong part in my decision to start as a friend, that & just tryin' to be respectful of her in general. Don't worry folks I haven't fallen madly in love or nothin'. If this doesn't work out I'll be fine for movin' on over.

I greatly appreciate all the replies. Thanks for all the great & funny advice.