My newfound sense of humor: What does Bob Marley drive?

A Marley Davidson!!!!!!

 

Q: Why did it take them six months to put Bob Marley in his grave?


A: Because he kept jammin'

 

The only musician jokes I have are raunchy ones about Michael Jackson. But everyone's already heard those.

For example, what do Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?

They both stick their meat in 5 year old buns.

LOL, isn't that awful? I swear, I'm not normally that crude.

 

Oh man, I have to admit that I chuckled.

 

that interogator looks just like me

 

What does Michael Jackson like about twenty eight year olds?
There's twenty of them.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic grocery bag?
One is made of plastic, and is dangerous for children to play with, the other you can carry groceries in.

What will they do to Michael Jackson if they catch him mollesting another kid?
Give him his own parrish.

 

LOL!

Why did Michael Jackson go to Walmart?

Because he heard the boys' pants were half-off.

There are so many MJ jokes. Mostly because it's just too easy. Though I feel bad for the children.

 

Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder
1. All the DNA is the same.
2. There are no dental records.

 

Difference between Michael & Santa Claus?

They both leave your kid's room with their bag empty.

 

How many trippin' hippies does it take to change a light bulb?
Oh, wow! I didn' even notice it was dark, maaan!

 

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves assigned to
the same sleeping compartment on a transcontinental train. Though
initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two are
tired and fall asleep quickly-he in the upper bunk and she in the lower.

At 1:00 AM, he leans over and gently wakes the woman saying, "Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet
to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replies.

"Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."

"Wow! That's a great idea!!" he exclaims.
"Good," she replies. "Get your own damn blanket!"
After a few moments of silence, he farted.

 

How many dead heads does it take to change a light bulb?​

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​

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THREE​

one to actually change it and two to stand around and talk about how Jerry could have done it better!!!!!!!!!!!​

 

I think I could love you. LOL

 

whats sad about me is, i really think Jerry could have done it better, LOL!!​

 

Now I know I love you!!!

 

:::huggs olhippie:::

We keep a Jerry Doll in our living room, he has his own chair

 

how many guitar players does it take to change a lightbulb?

one, he just stands on a chair and the world revolves around him.

why do musicians keep drumsticks on thier dashboard?

so they can park in a handicap spot.

(sorry, have to have been in a band to understand)

 

My Jerry doll.

 

I just told my hubby that one, he thought it was great HAHA

 

(BTW, no intention to offend anyone)