my MOM.

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by dietcoketree, May 30, 2006.

  1. dietcoketree

    dietcoketree Member

    so my mom and i have had a tension filled relationship ever since i was about 8 (im 16 now). well, those of you who have mom issues may or may not understand when i say that since then, things and problems have just escalated, and basically gotten BAD.

    this past weekend, she told me that i should move out for summer. im going to be staying with my dad for a month of it, and then move in with my aunt or something the rest of the time.

    i dont understand how she can ask me to LEAVE and then in the same breathe tell me how much she loves me. its like, i understand we need our space, but shes telling me she'd be better off if i was gone.

    dont know what im expecting by posting this- i suppose im just getting it out there.
     
  2. starkmojo

    starkmojo Member

    My relationship with my mom improved markedly when i moved out (when I was 16) hopefully your summer apart will help.
     
  3. ihmurria

    ihmurria fini

    sometimes some space can help
    I moved out at 17, before starting university, and my relationship with my mom has never been better. Me moving out and being independent helped her realize that I'm an adult now.
    Just try it, and see how it works out. Maybe she's just struggling really hard with realizing that you're on teh verge of being an adult, that you can legally work now, could legally be on your own if you had to.

    I guess, I'm also used to being torn between houses, my parents split when I was 4 and I've been travelling between them for all of my life, spending most of hte summer with my dad and most of the school year with my mom.

    I think if you try it, and try to make the absolute best out of it that you can, it could be a really amazing, positive experience for you that will strengthen your relationship with your mom. But it's going to take some work.
     
  4. Zepp

    Zepp Member

    ya diet i know how that feels i was 16 too when my mother had kicked me out off the house, after years of fighting. Thinking back on it now the biggest problem with parrents like this is they don't realize that we really are growing up and are not kids anymore. I was often fighting for freedom and stuff, but i relize i may have went about it the wrong way.

    But i must agree with u the hardest part is when they tell u they love u even though u cant live with them/see them. I havent seen my mom for more then 2 hours since then, and talked to her on the phone for maybe 10 minites, although i did phone her this past mother's day, i don't want to be bitter anymore, since thats how i would have acted a few years ago..

    Just so u know you're not alone and to keep strong
     
  5. YankNBurn

    YankNBurn Owner

    I guess Im a bad parent , could never kick my kids out and they know they door is always open no matter what. I would do anything to assist them. When I got mad at them, I would let off my steam and allowed them to do the same, get it all out and I would then apologize becuase as the adult I should have kept my cool. I never said get out or anything like that, more like I cant believe you did that, I thought you would have chosen differently ect. I always allowed them to discuss anything, from curfews ect. I guess I was odd.
     
  6. dawlash

    dawlash Member

    My mother and I would have arguments, but we would always make up afterwards. She was a very special woman, and I miss her very much, and I just regret ever telling her that in all her arguments, and time wasted between us, we could have been enjoying life...
     
  7. moon_flower

    moon_flower Banned

    My mom and I had a really bad relationship. I put a lot of strain on it, and so did she. We're just two different people....it took us years of fighting and whatnot to realize that we need each other and we just have to agree to disagree.
    I've been kicked out of her house like 12 times (she always took me back when I had no place to go). Now, our relationship is great. We still argue sometimes....but it's over pety things and we just forget about it and do something cool together.
    Just give your relationship time. You're just 16....you have your whole life for it to work out....and eventually, it will.
     

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