My girlfriend is afraid of anal sex, she's never really been interested in it at all (along with the fact I am 8 inches long and 5 3/4 inches in girth, which scares her even more being an anal virgin), until I started dating her and showing her that anal play can be extremely pleasurable. While I have been experienced in anal before and I love to do it and can't get enough of it, but I can't seem to get her on board with this idea and I really want to do it and open her sexual world even more ( and by no means is she a sexual prude, she does almost everything except this). Any advice in how to sway her, without forcing her to do it?
maybe she thinks anal area is for "exit" only and not "entry" --i say no biggie . if u love her who gives a fuck anyway ?
Keep applying gentle conversational pressure, and keep exploring different ways to pleasure her ass. If it's truly a matter of anxiety and not values then I believe it will happen; be patient and don't sour the idea for her by pushing too hard or getting impatient with her. Let her know it's 100% ok if the answer is no, never, and keep gently warming her up to her own pleasure down there. Maybe talk through a game plan with her; "first I'll kiss you there, then i'll play with a finger, then i'll slide it in, then we'll try 2 fingers, then I will rub with the head of my cock, then i will push very gently and massage you with it . . . " etc get her super turned on and remember that foreplay begins when you wake up in the morning. be affectionate and maybe have a special date planned out, steak wine and love have a way of loosening inhibitions
Behind your question, I hear "I really like anal. Therefore (once they experience it) everyone should be into it and make it a regular part of their play." No, some people might not be into it, even if they've enjoyed it once. I also hear an attitude that prudishness is the only reason that one would not be into anal. That not being into it is a lack in some way. Wrong, its a personal choice. Similar to preferring strawberry ice cream over chocolate. Your experience will help her check it off of her bucket list, but, at that point, its her decision how often it becomes a part of her play.
Never give up your dreams - but maybe accept that is all that particular act will be. Don't forget, every so-called credible survey still puts percentage of women who've never had anal at over 50%. It's not everyone's dream. But gentle persuasion is okay, provided you respect a final decision as final.
How often do you engage in anal play together, and is she enthusiastic about that after discovering how pleasurable it can be? Understand that the road to anal sex can be quite long for some people, but if she enjoys anal play there is hope. Continue sharing that together, try to make it always as pleasurable as you can for her, rub and finger her asshole during oral and vaginal sex, make anal play a regular part of sex together, etc., slowly ramping up the amount over time and the size she can fit—if you finger her ass with one finger now, work up to two, etc. The more she likes that, the more likely she will be to want to progress further to anal intercourse. Don't push, just work with her slowly to explore what she does enjoy and the more you explore the more you may also expand what she enjoys.
What tommyhot said. It sounds like it's just not her thing, don't push it. (No pun intended) I can relate, I have no interest either.
