my friend is addicted

Discussion in 'Mental Health' started by check., Feb 10, 2009.

  1. check.

    check. Senior Member

    to alcohol and... you're not going to believe it, weed. yes, he is addicted to weed.

    now to start off, i used to drink on occasion, maybe an average of once a month. sometimes i'd go without drinking for a few weeks or so, and then drink every weekend for a long time. I would always get drunk simply because I don't eat much, and I'm short and stuff, and I'm just a lightweight. however, once i started smoking weed, i sort of lost interest in drinking. i dont plan on getting drunk any time soon (i think i got alcohol poisoning this past weekend). as for smoking, i like to smoke with friends, and occasionally by myself but at the most i'll smoke a few times a week.

    so as for my friend... he is a lightweight, like i am. however, he has NO control over himself. in the past i've been out of control with drinking, but i at least know when to stop. like, when i'm already hammered i dont want to drink more. he's the opposite... last weekend he was really drunk and grabbed a screwdriver and threatened to stab his friends because they weren't giving him more to drink. he drinks by himself on weekdays too, when he has to wake up early the next day for school (he's 16). he once drank half a gallon of wine in about an hour on a monday night.

    i've tried talking to him about it, but he just says "leave me alone, let me drink and be merry". i would just let it go, but its hard to see him like this. it's starting to affect our friendship, especially with the whole weed addiction thing too. he's always been my smoking buddy... but we were friends before we started smoking weed and it seems like now all we do is smoke. like i get the feeling he wouldnt even want to hang out with me if i didnt want to smoke with him.

    i would just suck it up and deal with it, but for one, whenever we're smoking together, he's not chill. like hes so hyper and crazy when hes drunk or high, and its just obnoxious to deal with him. then, even when we're already high, he ALWAYS wants more. like he cant just be happy with what he has. this is where the addiction thing starts to come in. its the same when hes drinking, he always wants to be on something. when hes drunk, he wants to be high too.

    its so frustrating but at the same time hes my friend and i still care about him. hes a great guy and id like to still be able to hang with him and maybe smoke the occasional bowl but not EVERY TIME. I know i dont have any control over him, and i have to let him make his own decisions, but i want to help him. i've talked to our other friends and they all agree that hes not fun to be around anymore, because he's always so out of control. hes even high when no one else is, like last saturday my friend had a party, and no one was going to drink until later. but he insisted on me picking up some weed for him so he could smoke before he went to the party.

    i was going to talk to him tomorrow because we were going to hang out (and smoke, of course) but he invited this other annoying kid to join us so now im thinking i'll just go, smoke a bit, and leave so i dont have to deal with him. i just dont know how to talk to him so he'll understand. ive tried telling him i care about him, but he doesnt want to listen. my other friend has tried talking to him before and all that led to was the two of them no longer being friends at all. i dont want me and him to end up like that, but im kinda scared that if i say anything he wont want to hang out with me at all anymore. i would just stop hanging out with him, but we're in the same circle of friends, and i dont necessarily trust that my other friends would stop hanging out with him, so i'd just be left out.

    any advice? i guess someone who has dealt with drug problems before. in my family, my grandfather and two of my cousins are alcoholics. so i know how it can really mess up families and stuff. my friend's dad is an alcoholic as well though, so that might be why hes so unwilling to accept it, because he sees his dad drink himself to sleep every night so he thinks its okay.
  2. I think the booze is more of his problem than the weed. Probably need to take care of the worst addiction first, then move on to the habitual addiction.

    I'd see if you could find an AlAnon or Alateen group (or forum) to stop by. They might have some good ideas to help you help your friend
  3. alcoholics... just like to call it a disease so they don't have to admit to being dumb as a rock

    weed addict.. what a bunch of crap
  4. RandomOne

    RandomOne Member

    sounds like he has some shit he's trying to sort out. try to find the root of the problem.

    Then again a lot of kids are retards and just wanna get fucked up as often as possible. could be he's saying he's addicted as an excuse for that, does he even know what 'addiction' means?
  5. check.

    check. Senior Member

    he's not saying hes addicted, we are. he's in denial i think.
  6. RandomOne

    RandomOne Member

    does he have withdrawals if he doesnt smoke for a couple days? what are the symptoms of his addiction? It's pretty damn hard to get addicted to either of those things.

    I wouldn't say he's addicted, obsessive compulsive maybe.
  7. check.

    check. Senior Member

    well he just wants to be high or drunk ALL the time. like when we arent smoking or drinking, hes like "omg i cant wait until *day we have planned to drink/smoke*" and thats all he'll talk about. he'll drink whenever he can, whether it be on a school night or whatever, and he smokes whenever he can... he'll call me up and beg me to get my car so he can go smoke. its fucking annoying.

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