I took around 5-6 grams of powdered mushrooms because i wanted to learn about my depression and the meaning of life etc. I have made a huge change to my life prior to this experience I have been eating a lot healthier and discipline myself to work out and get in shape. I have takin a small dose of LSD 100ug before and I learned a lot from that trip as well like expressing your feelings is okay and not a bad thing at all. This is what happened I first started off by taking a small dose to see what it the feeling was like and it really felt like I smoked a joint or a blunt, music was better, sight was better, and a little time distortion as well. so an hour or two went by and up the dosage because i felt like i could handle more. I looked up some stuff on the internet to do while tripping since i was new at it and i saw that people were recommended some movies so i decided to watch the movie charlie and the chocolate factory. This movie was so fucking hilarious I like 20-30 min of it and the shrooms were kicking in hard and fast. I started hear this loud ringing noise in my ears and i was seeing colors everywhere. My computer and my desk were literally melting and disappearing. My room was starting the breathe and warp. I was starting to have an anxiety attack and i was questioning everything about life from death - happiness - the corporations - politics - and everything and I thought to myself in the end does it all really matter? And thats when things started to get really weird. I was so scared so i called my friend on skype and he helped calm me down a bit so i ran quickly to get some food and I felt this weird sensation like I was living life in a loop. When i went to go make dinner i grabbed the bowl of rice and when i it looked like it started to disappear. So i ran back to my room and went to go lay down and just completely let go Reality was disappearing material objects did not exist. I started floating up this beautiful mechanical trippy tunnel. And there was a light at the end of it much like my LSD trip. I was finally able to reach the end of the light this time and thats when it felt like I was talking with the mushroom. Because i was in another realm of reality although i couldn't really see anything. I asked the mushroom why am I depressed. Then in matter of seconds it showed me the answer. It showed me the importance of having human connection. What it was like to die alone. And what it was like to be in a relationship with a women and i was so happy in this visual. Since I never have been in a relationship before. The next day I felt stronger, and had an amazing afterglow and wanted to seek out friendship and finally take the leap to be in a relationship. I also have anxiety and it is slowly going away as well.
That's a Heavy dose for a first trip, it's good that you were able to learn from it and sounds like it was therapeutic for you. It's good that you are able to integrate the experience post trip.
