my boyfriend doesn't want to eat me out

I was being facetious about him being gay. I have a hard time understanding how this could be such a deal breaker.

 

Little Indian - - - Please let us know your decision and how it works out.

Lady of the Freaks - - Love that pic of the Whip Lady!





Choose carefully, have fun, and play safely!

 

If this is the worst thing going on in your life then I'd be quite glad. It is annoying yes but you cant leave someone you 'love' because of it! Maybe just get some cherry lube or something and do it in a way where it just happens - dont put pressure on it!

 

Thats true actually what some other person said. There are many girls who dont give head to lads, but they dont get thrown the "she muzt be a lezbiannn Lolllzzzzzzzz" card. But when the lad doesnt want to go down on the girl he gets the "oh i cant stay with him then".

 

Voice of experience here....

I was in a long term relationship with a man who was not into eating pussy AT ALL!! But boy, he sure loved it when I sucked his dick..Now, I hope that I'm not offending anyone, but I have found that the majority of African American men do not eat pussy..There are a few that do..and are exceptionally good (current man is at the top of the list ) but most won't and if they do they are almost in the closet about it..weird..Sometimes it was ok not being on the receiving end. Sometimes not ok..I'd say that in the 8 1/2 yrs we were together,maybe 5 times?? And not worth it..a few licks and he was through..Our sex life was generally good..he was not very inventive, but I am so that made up for it. But..after a while he became a very selfish lover...oh baby...suck my dick tonight..I'll make it up to you tomorrow..of course tomorrow there was an excuse..too tired, friends over, some stupid sports game on TV, etc..After a while it got real old. I left him 3 yrs ago this month. It was getting uglier by the day but that is a different story.. Since I've left him I can honestly say that 99% of my partners did/do eat pussy..I know that I will not subject myself to a long term relationship with a partner who does not...ever again...

It is all about pleasuring/pleasing your partner..Obviously some partners are more into their own enjoyment...But to me oral sex is a shared experience...and I enjoy it..

Hope this makes sense...

 

Done the same thing for women

I love me some blow jobs and I am no cheater

 

He sounds alot like me...damnit. Reading all these ladies thoughts really make me feel shitty. I don't really have a reason either. It dont like the idea of bodily fluids going in my mouth. I don't expect oral from her either though. But man...I guess I to try new things if I want to keep my girl huh?

 

I'm going to agree with the post above this one... True love conquers all...
Discuss it with him, for god's sake.

Don't leave somebody because they won't eat you out.
Some people just don't like it, and there doesn't have to be a reason.
There probably is, somewhere deep down inside his mind, but that doesn't mean he'd necessarily know what it is... The subconscious can store things you don't even know about that can affect you in so many ways...

 

Frozen Solid - - Un-freakin-believable! No further comment necessary.

Sarahrei - - Wow! Please don’t be offended, but you seem pretty hard for twenty years old. Doing what you don't like eventually leads to frustration ... I prefer to make every effort to learn to enjoy the things that my partner enjoys. Try it, your might find that you like it.



Have fun, play safely, and remember that only real men perform cunnilingus

 

That is understandable, forcing someone to do something they don't like can be a relationship break as well. If you are willing to take as others say one for the team then cool. But not everyone does or can. I don't think a relationship should be all about sex. It should be about love and understanding. As a partner you should understand that your partner doesn't like it. You know there are actually women who don't like being eaten out. I think that its fair that you don't expect a women to do it. Its actually nice that some guys don't expect it.


Tiffany

 

The major parts of a good relationship are love, understanding, acceptance, compatibility, and lastly sex.

 

Why is acceptance and compatibility underlined. You can't really be compatible about everything, where the interest in the relationship. Acceptance, well I don't know. Maybe she should just accept that he doesn't like it. I don't know, I don't think any of us have the right to tell her to leave her boyfriend for this. It should ultimately be her decision. She really needs to think whats important, the person she loves or the sexual act she loves.

Tiffany

 

You seem to give things a lot of serious thought, so you deserve a thoughtful response Tiffany.

Acceptance and compatibility are underlined only to call your attention to them - - since they weren’t on your original list. This would be my rank order of importance: love, acceptance, compatibility, and sex.

Right on, there are probably no two people in this entire world that are totally compatible, and that is why acceptance is so terribly important. If your prospective partner has a bad habit, say picking his nose at the dinner table, you had better accept it up front because he isn’t going to change and it will drive you crazy …. until you foolishly try too hard to change him, and then you’ll lose him.

Acceptance of each other's character, looks, values, morals, personhood, etc. is absolutely of paramount importance in my experience.

Profound. Should be made a sticky!




Have fun, play safely, and keep your brain engaged!

 

Oh I didn't give a full list. They are so important, accepting someone for who they are is important. Otherwise how can you truly love someone if you trying to change them. Thank you for the compliment. I know sex plays a part in a relationship, but if your relationship is all about sex. Good sex doesn't always last, but true love is something I am willing to give my heart to.


Tiffany

 

A full list would be pretty long, wouldn't it? How about a thread in the Relationships Forum? What are the main ingredients of a potentially successful relationship?

If you don’t unreservedly give your heart 110% the relationship is doomed to fail.

 

I totally agree with you and I must say I really can't image a long term relationship without oral sex. Otherwise, you know what they say - good sex is 10% of a relationship, bad is 90%. I'll talk to my boyfriend tomorrow, but I'm not sure we can fix this.

 

Are you joking me? Everyones advising you to leave this poor guy? You "cant live without oral sex"...sorry, that sounds a bit sad, if you supposedly love this person. Maybe he just simply DOESNT ENJOY IT. Like some people dont like things like bdsm, or role play or the colour orange, you know. People have preferences and you need to respect that.
You cant demand it from someone, and it simply isnt important. Making love is a joint thing, you do things you both like, you cant lie back and enjoy it if you know hes not into it, surely? It doesnt sound like love to me
Im trying to imagine the scene if I wasnt up for oral and my husband said "right thats it, Im leaving as I cant live without it". Uhm, I dont think so

On the other hand it could genuinely be a problem for him psychologically for some reason, so talk it through, try and get more answers as to why, be caring, perhaps
I couldnt do certain sexual acts for a long time after I was abused and didnt explain the reason to my husband for a while. You just never know

 

^^ Of course you can't demand it from someone and I don't want to do that, so that's exactly the reason why I think it's the best we split up. He'll find another girl who won't be bothered by that and I'll find another guy who will know how to satisfy me and will care about my needs and wishes. And please don't say things like "this is not love", you can't possibly imagine how I feel and maybe you think I'm crazy, but I know I'll never be truly happy this way. And here's another thing - I only come during oral sex and I NEVER had an orgasm with him (when he went down on me those 5 times, it lasted about 5min, heh, which is definitely not enough for me). I just don't want to be sexually unsatisfied my whole life! You are accusing me of not really loving him, but what about him leaving me unsatisfied and not even bothering to do something about it? Is this love??!

 

I dont think either of you love eachother tbh. Purely for the reasons you are leaving him, and for him not changing his ways to stop himself from losing you.
Why not get him some viagra and see if you can orgasm from sex, even if it takes some doing.

 

I advise you to break up with him after reading your posts you two are wasting each other's time. I don't really think You are in love with him or you wouldn't even be contemplating leaving him over something so mundane.