Music Tastes Collide

Discussion in 'Music' started by frozenfun, Mar 2, 2016.

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  1. Asmodean

    Asmodean Slo motion rider

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    Too simplified statement for my taste (suprise! :-D). The OP's problem is about expectations.. and wishful thinking. You have to give and take in a relationship. Which is rarely a big problem in a good one.

    2 mind shattering statements here (music irrelevant??? ok happily it is already put in a subjective way). But... :( since when do you have a bf?
     
    Asmodean, Mar 8, 2016
    #21
  3. Piaf

    Piaf Senior Member

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    You're right.
    I take it back.
     
    Piaf, Mar 8, 2016
    #22
  5. frozenfun

    frozenfun Members

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    Huh? I am confused now haha.
     
    frozenfun, Mar 8, 2016
    #23
  7. Mattekat

    Mattekat Ice Queen of The North

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    If he is going to shows with you and driving you there and stuff because you like them and he wants to make you happy, then you should probably reciprocate and go to one of his shows. Suck it up and do something you might not like to show him you care. On the other hand, if he is going to these shows with you because he also likes them and that was a shared interest for you guys, then saying he refuses to do this anymore until you do his thing is pretty childish. It still wouldn't hurt to go to one thing with him to show your support for him though.

    Honestly though, it sounds like you guys are incompatible in a lot of other ways too, not just this.
     
    Mattekat, Mar 9, 2016
    #24
  9. Ashalicious

    Ashalicious Senior Member

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    I've been dragged to shows that I had no interest in going to, and had a really shitty time as a result. Now, I'd never drag a spouse or friend to a show that they didn't want to go to. I'd much rather go to a concert alone, and I have in the past done just that.
     
    Ashalicious, Mar 9, 2016
    #25
  11. Meliai

    Meliai Members

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    As much as I would love to accept this superlative, let's be real here. This is just pretty standard advice by HF standards. I've seen way worse.
     
    Meliai, Mar 9, 2016
    #26
  13. guerillabedlam

    guerillabedlam _|=|-|=|_

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    Hmmm... I cannot think of a single show that I was 'dragged' to that I didn't end up enjoying. Maybe it's a bit sappy to say but usually even if the music is kind of mediocre or something, then spending the time with the people and having those experiences I tend to find rewarding in some way.

    Oddly enough, One of my worst concert experiences was a show I was super thrilled about going to and it was a free ticket, for my Birthday and the band just completely bombed.

    Probably even good advice by my standards [​IMG]
     
    guerillabedlam, Mar 9, 2016
    #27
  15. drumminmama

    drumminmama Super Moderator Super Moderator

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    Well, this last bit does highlight something.
    In a functioning relationship, it helps if people have some intersecting passions. And levels of caring about other things.
    And, it really helps to be game for things you do not think will thrill you.
    In the case of EDM, I have an, oh, hour tolerance, on average.
    I much prefer it blended into other things, deeper textures to the night.
    But I'll go to get the experience, or tag along to make someone happy. It's a few hours.
    I also know when to go alone, or let someone go alone, or with friends.

    I'm happier at some genres solo. I have a point where I suggest the partner ask a buddy to go.
    As long as we go to some shows (mostly his stuff, see the solo comment) together, he's happy.

    So, go to something local and cheap. Try to have fun, get lost in the beat, or lights, or people watching.
    Maybe see if there is any ecstatic dance (drink and drug free dance parties) locally. Those are usually fun, no have lots of chill spaces to get away.

    If the incompatibility runs deep, do yourself, and him a favor and let him go. You will both prosper.
     
    drumminmama, Mar 12, 2016
    #28
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