Anyways, my mom... this month alone... owes me $200. There are a few key things that piss me off about this situation that I get into every month with her. 1. Every month she ask for money, swearing up and down that she will pay me back, but she doesn't. 2. She pays other people, though. 3. If my sister comes by asking for money, she will immediately give her the money, that I essentially gave her or she owes me with. 4. If she does pay me back, it's half, if not less than half of the amount she owes me, 5. And when she gives me the money that she owes me... I will get attitude from her for several days. 6. She never or hardly ask my brother for money, when he has more money than I do. 7. She pays him back, and doesn't give him the guilt trip afterwards. On top of that, that stupid credit card I gave her... she is not paying. And now the stupid bill collector is calling me everyday like fucking five times a day. I keep telling her to give me the damn card, so I can pay it. But, she keeps on insisting that she has paid it, and that she will proceed to pay it. And she doesn't understand how they found my number, because when she was filling the forms out... she gave her number. And I'm like, it's because it's a credit card in my name. On a final note, she wants me to pay a $200 bill, that should be $50, but she hasn't been paying it if for the last couple of months. She needs to file bankruptcy. She owes more money than she makes. But, no... she doesn't want to. I'm just so tired. All the time.
That sucks, especially since it's your mom, and I know you are emotionally exhausted with the whole thing. When it comes to loaning money to family, or both of those together for whatever reason, shit doesn't always work out. Spaceman Spiff's reply is the short and obvious answer to your situation, but you obviously feel obligation to help your mom because she IS your mom and you feel it's the right thing to do. I think that's what's eating at you emotionally. You can control this by loaning her a lesser amount than what she asks for and except the fact that you won't get it back. Or, don't loan her any at all. "I ain't got it" becomes effective if you say it numerous times. Don't let it get the best of you.
Comunicate with her, tell her how you think and feel about this. Seek professional counselling, then spend $300 on a finanial advisor to tell her how to spend less money. Im being the opposite of my usual self in this thread, pffttt, like any of that will do anything, but its what everyone usually say. My usual self would say something like roofies in her gin and tonic, then a gentle bath .....with a toaster. But im not going to say that this time becuase i want to be supportive
You're usual self would attack my momma for being a woman, let's be real, VG. That's why I love you. As for communication, oh... that's all I have been doing. It just goes right over her head. I have better luck talking to the wall. Anyhow, thanks for being supportive. I was scared that I would get nasty replies. I mean Aeri can do a thread like this because she is queen A, but me... it's like, bitch get your life together and stop complaining. :unsure:
We knew your Mom wouldn't pay before you even gave her the card, but you just plunge in. How can anyone help you if you deliberately allow these things to happen. That's a mental illness and should be treated. You need an intervention. The novel THE GLASS CEILING, provides some insight into this masochistic behaviour
https://www.hipforums.com/forum/topic/482264-do-you-think-its-a-bad-idea-to-get-a-credit-card-for-someone-else-to-use/?p=8056309 Learn anything? Cancel the card.
