I...it...seems so long ago now I remember it. No, I can't...I...blurred faces in pain... Have I ever told you my cat with hands idea?
Testing, testing....one two....one two...As in microphone Mike, 'Are we getting any signal at the back Mack!!' (Should maybe have saved it for the random thread.) Or Mickey take? I'm the one looking in from outside here; it's too cryptic for me man!
Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiichael!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Which one?
He's been hitting the wine again. I guess that wagon ride was a bit bumpier than he thought it would be....
Have I ever told you my cat with hands idea? It's basically this, you get a really happy cat, you know, one of those cats that's always purring and rubbing against your leg even when you haven't fed it in a couple days. Yeah. You get one of those cats and you cut off its paws. Then you get someone's hands, preferably not someone who's still using them, ha ha, no, you get, say, a cadaver, or someone who's about to be a cadaver, and you chop off their hands and then sew them onto the cat's. I don't know how'd you deal with the discrepancy with the size of the wrist but maybe you can make an adaptor somehow by stealing some other animals wrist that's slightly larger than a cat's and smaller than a human's. Maybe a dog's. I'd say a pig, but I'm not sure if they have the right little tendons, specially since they've just got hooves. Right, then you sew everything onto where the happy cat's paws used to be, I don't know what you could do with the paws, perhaps sew them back onto the cadaver for a laugh, then you let everything heal for a couple weeks. Maybe lock it in a fluffy box or something so it's hands don't get all rough and gross and calloused. You check on it a lot and watch to see when the hand's get full mobility and when the cat's figured out how to use them. So say, when it's tapping out a decent rhythm or using the pinky and thumb to hold a mug, you pick it up and you put it on your lap and play with it. Do the wavy thing down the spine (at this point, you do everything you do with the cat in the story on the random appendage the girl's lent you), tickle its stomach (whatever side you did the wavy thing on, turn the appendage over and tickle it), pet it long enough to put the cat into that happy state just before it turns around and bites your hand for petting it too long, then pick it up and put it wherever you want on your body, your head, your bicep, your calves, and let it work it's magic. At this point I usually just knead at the arm or leg making little cat noises and snuffling through my nose until an appropriate time has passed then stop and finish the story with a lame "and that's why it'd be awesome to have a cat with hands."
You wont find mike - not until he comes back this way. He has rowed the boat ashore. Michael Row the boat ashore halleluja michael row the boat ashore halleluja theres some people on the other side hallelulja Theyve been there so long theyve died halleluleja
No...not Rover_Lass...no...NO!!!! No...not...she was okay... It was...was...it was...oh my head It was N...Ni...N...n...n...Nir...
