Hello, I am just coming to terms with my life. I didn't think it mattered about my preferences but the more my wife is withholding, the more I seem to miss my previous life. I am bi, but have preferred men most of my life. 33 m
You guys should go to marriage counseling and you should be 100% open about your desires. It’s all going to come out anyway. Do it on you terms before you develop spite for each other. Maybe she’ll be open to options that would work for you both. Maybe not, but don’t waste either of your time and energy.
Welcome, Bebo - Just gonna say - some of us (maybe even a lot of us) have been where you are. I hope you'll find some support here for what you need and are going through with your wife. What others think can help - but the important thing is to follow your own wisdom and what you can live with - some folks like to tell you what you should do to make things better or right - but truth is, only you can decide what you should do. I am in the same boat as you - but I am much further down the river... I hid my desires for same sex attractions and denied them, not only to my wife, but most importantly, to myself. It is not uncommon for some of us men of a certain age to come to the end of ourselves and realize what we really are, what we really desire, and then we try to figure out how we can be happy about all of that at the age we have arrived at. You can't go back - you can only go forward - it is up to you how you go forward.
Thanks to everyone for your input. I have been wanting to tell her but I know she will leave and I don't want to lose my kids. She will consider this the ultimate betrayal. I have to prepare to leave I think. I hate feeling like I have to hide in the shadow with my whole self. My family will be a whole other thing. I am Puerto Rican and iykyk.
